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luvmybaby28
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how do they determine global developmental delay
luvmybaby28
member
as opposed to simply developing at their own pace. EI determined that my son has a global developmental delay but I wonder how much of it is related to my husband and myself both reaching milestones late. I didn't walk or talk until after 2.
I just wonder if he is simply going to reach milestones on his own without the intervention. We are scheduled to see a pedi neurologist for a second opinion in a few weeks.
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Re: how do they determine global developmental delay
No EI or doctor will be able to tell you about what your son is GOING to do. They simply evaluate what is currently happening. They determine a global developmental delay through their evaluation. Milestones, skills and speech all have age ranges associated with them. If your child is not doing the thing in his age range then he is delayed.
There are several domains I can think of that they test such as: gross motor (walking), fine motor(pointing, writing), self help(eating, self regulation), language (talking), social and cognitive.
I would trust what EI is saying, but it always good for your piece of mind to get a second opinion. Delays are more than just "walking and talking". I also agree that waiting is out is not really a good plan.
Based on lurking on a few of your other posts on the toddler board, it seems like there are other concerns that you have regarding transitions/tantrums and sleeping habits. You have stated that the duration and intensity of some your DS behaviors are more than what you would consider typical. These other behaviors will also probably be discussed at your appointment along with any sensory issues such as picky eating etc.....
It is good you are getting these things checked out now and a plan in place in case he needs a bit of help.....Good luck with your appointment and let us know how it goes.
May I ask why you are so resistant to early intervention for your son? In a previous post you said you canceled the recommended ABA therapy and now are saying you think he doesn't need services even with a big delay. EI is such a wonderful thing- we love our therapists and they have made a huge difference in my girl's life. She might have caught up on her own, but that's not something I was willing to risk. What if he doesn't catch up on his own? At what point would you be willing to accept help for him- if he's not walking at 2? At 3? How would you feel knowing that these services were available and that you didn't take advantage of them?
I know it can be hard to accept that your child might need some extra help, but this isn't about you and is not a reflection on your parenting. If he needs therapy the best thing you can do is help him get it.
What she said. (thank you Soapstone)
Based on your badges, I get that you have put a ton of effort into the raising of your son and making choices you felt were "right" for him. Is your "wait and see" approach really right for him is is it more right for you? I suspect the latter.
Sometimes you have to put aside your ideas of what a perfect child is, accept the one you have. He is 'perfect'. He is perfect for you and you are the perfect Mommy for him.
Unfortunately, there is no badge for "I did everything right, and my kid's still messed up" I laugh now at all the effort I put into my pregnancy. What a colossal waste of time. I should have just drank the damn caffiene. I really hope you get some answers and are able to get your son the help he probably needs.
I was also speech delayed as a kid and so is DS. In the early 80s, when I was a toddler/preschooler, the same services didn't exist. However, I had a ton of reading and writing struggles through grade school. I eventually made my way into the "honors" track and you'd never know it now. That said, I have to wonder if I would have had the same struggles in grade school had EI existed as it does now.
I'm a teacher, and I was talking with a colleague of mine today. I've had both of her kids- both FANTASTIC students. The older one is the only non-family member who has ever babysat for us if that tells you how much I respect this family. I found out that she would have been on an IEP in early elementary school due to her reading issues. Her mom is one of the most highly respected teachers in my district and a model parent. You would have never known it when she was in high school- she was a straight A student who took challenging classes. That said, mom also shared with me that she struggled a ton in early grade school and it was a ton of work on her part to get her to where she needed to be. She thinks had she has the EI she needed earlier that she could have avoided those struggles in grade school and the stress they endured at that time.
I honestly think that we know so much more about how the brain develops and can affect so much change when addressed early enough. Take advantage of the services and see what happens... maybe your LO will develop faster and exceed his/her potential because of it.
I often wonder this about my own son. And if I'm honest, my husband always says "well I did this late, or I'm like that, or I don't like that either, my Dad didn't talk until he was 4 and look at him, he's a Yale professor...."
But. What if he doesn't? What if he does need intervention and you didn't get it for him and you wasted these critical early years - time that you will never be able to get back?
I don't have a diagnosis yet for my son, we have some suspictions, but not an official diagnosis yet. But I've pushed for every single service I could get for him since he qualified through EI at age 2. I don't always agree with their observations, or like what they have to say and its the biggest, toughest pill I ever had to swallow, but at the end of the day I know I'm doing everything I possibly can for him to have the best possible chances of being the best he can be.