PPD and real pants

Tracilaroo

So, I was back in normal pants (granted they were one size too big when I got pregnant) within 3 days, could wipe with TP and have zero pain when going to the bathroom within a week and had no hemmies. My punishment for this goodness? Severe post partum depression. I cried ALL the time. ALL THE TIME. I had panic attacks, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep and I would look at my precious baby and feel nothing. I went to the doctor and they gave me zoloft but it takes time to build up and the panic attacks were still happening. I now have xanax which helps me sleep somewhat and keeps the attacks at bay but makes me feel tired all day (of course, part of that is from waking up to feed the baby). I can no longer breastfeed because of the xanax. So, things have been difficult to say the least.

Macy is such a good baby though, she pretty much only cries when she needs something and I just love her so much. I can't wait for the zoloft to take full effect so I can feel more like myself again. I hope everyone else is doing better in the emotional department than I am. I've gotten such great support from friends who have kids and have gone through similar situations and it has really helped me pull through. Plus my DH has been doing more than his share of the work since I have a hard time sometimes. I am so lucky to have him.

ames243567

I am sorry you are going through PPD.  I met with my dr. yesterday and will be starting Zoloft tomorrow.  I think the worst part is when I look at DD I also feel nothing.  It is an awful feeling!

bobbi5342

Hang in there, ladies. Glad to hear that you have great support systems behind you.

SoonToBeMsP

So sorry to hear you're dealing with PPD, but so happy to hear you've got the support you need. We're here for you, too!!

Lhand11

I also felt nothing when I looked as DS. It has gotten better without meds, DH has been keeping a close eye on me looking for cues of ppd. I don't think it left the arena of the baby blues, but has def been teetering on the edge. DH has been amazing at helping out and making sure I am getting the sleep I need and special quality time with DS. He always tells me how much DS loves me and how comfortable he is with me and in my arms. 

I really hope for the best for both of you. I know how weird it is to feel a disconnect between you and your baby. It makes me feel so guilty. It will get better (so they say), but good for you for reaching out and getting help! I hope I will be able to do that if things seem to get worse instead of better.  

megaloo27

I'm so sorry ladies. I pray you to get back to yourselves soon. Hang in there, your little ones love you no matter what!  I think for me, I feel like everything is surreal. Like I'm babysitting someone else's baby and I'm going to give them back. I'm not having trouble bonding, but feel like "is this for real?" 

Tracilaroo

Thanks ladies! I am slowly starting to feel better and I am feeling more attached and more in love with my baby every day. My MIL is coming several mornings a week to help us out for a couple hours so that usually means we can get another hour of sleep and eat breakfast and get ready. She's an amazing help. I also got some herbal remedies by Hyland's that have helped a little as well. If you have "baby blues" they may be something really worth checking out.