not postpartum...yet

MelissaMiso

But dealing with depression at the end of my 2nd trimester. The past two weeks I've noticed that I have totally started biting my nails. Then, after waking up to pee, I have not been able to fall back to sleep because I am worrying about things in life (I've been terribly underemployed since June, unable to find permanent employment, bills are piled up, etc.). The past two days, I have gotten up feeling "off" and weepy, and at 1:30 am this morning, I woke up and began having an anxiety attack. Now I'm up trying to vent and distract myself.

I've dealt with depression and anxiety periodically in my life and did have some depression in my first trimester (combination of hormones, being exhausted, severe underemployment and the aftermath of our house being robbed). This recent anxiety has me really concerned. I'm not sure if something is coming up in my dreams as I am not remembering them, but there is certainly something being stirred up in my subconscious mind. So frustrating. Looks like it may be time to get some therapy again.

Thanks for reading and allowing me to express myself. As a therapist myself, I am more often on the listening end, taking on other peoples' problems, and don't  have many avenues to express my own struggles. 

EVA116

You are stressed and that is normal. As for the waking up...I don't think it is dreams. Your body is getting you ready for the baby and is starting to wake itself up. This will be a good tool for when the baby comes. I was a great sleeper until I got pregnant and then I would wake up periodically too.

here is an article on sleep and pregnancy. Everything you are going through is normal. I know that having previous anxiety can make you think that all the symptoms are a panic or anxiety attack but most of it is just being pregnant.

https://kidshealth.org/parent/pregnancy_center/your_pregnancy/sleep_during_pregnancy.html#

MelissaMiso

No, I'm not blaming the waking up on the anxiety. I woke up because I had to pee. The anxiety attack occurred when I got back into bed. I know the symptoms of anxiety attacks and this definitely was one. As for the dreams, there are some theories that believe that the subconscious mind will frequently start working things out in dreams that the waking mind/ego is not ready to face yet. I almost always remember at least one dream a night. The past three nights, I have not been able to recall a single detail of any dreams. This is coinciding with waking with a general feeling of anxiety, and the anxiety attack last night. It makes me wonder what is going on in the dreams and if it could be connected.