Maternal Instinct?

Chellezy

Is this my maternal insinct kicking in??

When my baby is born, this is how I would LIKE things to go.
-Baby is born in a hospital, the only person other than the doctors in the delivery room is my husband.
-Family can visit in small groups in the hospital.
-Go home. Stay home. Hide out with just my Hubby and my Baby.
I dont want visitors. I dont want to be bothered by constant phonecalls (Whos knows what kind of sleep ill get, dont call me! Ill call you!)
Do this for a month while we figure out a schedule and just bonding with baby alone.
Like, I think if someone shows up and wants to pick up and cuddle my new tiny baby I might loose it! Like, I just feel, dont come over, leave me alone, dont touch my baby, dont pick up my baby! I just want a few weeks ALONE with my baby and my husband in peace (or something like that).

Is this logical?! I just feel so protective of this child and baby isnt even here yet! I have this overwhealming sense of "this child is Mine."
Im also a super independant person by nature and want to do it alone with my husband and no other help unless I ask for it.
Am I crazy?

tnd81

No, I was similar with my DD. but not bc I was super protective, I didn't care if my family & friends wanted to hold her. I just wanted to chill with my new lil family. I wasn't in the mood for a revolving door and I don't understand why everyone wants to bombard the new parents. It's really nice that everyone cares & wants to meet the new baby but after a few weeks was cool with me, let us settle in. I also didn't care much for help, I was fine with doing it all on our own & letting us figure it out. 

 Just make that clear before delivery.  

faith_urz4eva

I was happy to have my mom there to cook and clean when I had DD! I will however be A LOT more straight forward with visitors this 2nd time around, we were bombarded in the hospital, and I let people come out of obligation. It really bothers me looking back. This time there will be little to no visitors at the hospital. I mean I literally still had blood on the sheets when my DHs family came in. I felt pressure because they had been waiting for so long. This time i plan to tell people not to come to the hospital at all. It is just all too overwhelming, 

dreambig527

I want a similar situation except that I want my mom around daily to help out and show me what to do with certain things (bathing, nail clipping, burping...etc).  I've had lots of experience with infants but I know when I'm sleep deprived and nervous as heck to mess something up, I'll want her around to at least say, "yep you're gonna be ok".

 But I agree that I don't want a mad rush of phone calls and visitors all the time- I want the first month or two for us to just get on a schedule and for me to be able to just sleep whenever baby does.

surprise3rd

Agree with a few different thoughts for my life.  I like to have friends visit in the hospital, get the first let me see the new tiny baby out of the way, they all have to sterilize their hands, can't bring their kids, only stay for a short time, and I don't have to play hostess.

My sister...who is awesome 99% of the time is coming to take care of my kids while I am in the hospital.  C-section means 3-4 days.  She will probably stay for a day or two after I get discharged.  I know she will entertain my kids, clean and do laundry.  She doesn't cook, but DH does.  Then my mom will come for a few days, but probably 3-4 weeks after we get home. (mom will be here day of delivery, but then they have plans and need to be in the mid-west) I totally agree with having limited visitors to the house and most people know to let you call them, or they will leave a message that say something to the effect of...

"just wanted to say Hi, see how you guys were doing, I know you may not be able to call me back for 2-3 years, but Juste wanted to let you know that we are thinking of you and your precious new baby.  xoxo"  Just leave your phone off so it goes straight to voicemail.

It has been my experience that people are pretty understanding after you have a baby and give you your space.

myluckypig

I was really fortunate and all the visitors I had were 15 min or less visitors (except for immediate family).  I was getting fed up with having to entertain people...I didn't really mind people wanting to hold her...a short break every now and then was okay.  Whenever my mom, MIL, or sisters would come visit, I would use that time to go lay down and rest. 

JennDave+1

The first time around I wanted everyone to meet my little guy. I was in the hospital for a few days and it was all new to me so I didn't mind visitors.

The second time around I was in the hospital for 24 hours - visitors non stop and visitors at the house non stop for a few days after (mostly DH's side). With another child to take care of all I wanted to do was have a nap and that didn't happen.

This time around. I don't want any visitors at the hospital except immediate family (mom, dad, mil). With such a short hospital stay I would like to try and get a nap in lol because I know when I come home with #3 this will be next to impossible.

Our hospital policy is that you don't leave LD until an hour after birth so it will just be DH and I in there.

As for staying home for a month I would be going stir crazy. I was out within the week with both my boys (groceries or errands). Plus the second time around hard to keep a 3 year old inside for a whole month.

MrsMandaK

I get it, but I feel differently.  I have a super close family and I couldn't imagine telling any of them to stay away for a month.  Of course, I'm strict about hand washing and not coming around if you're sick, but otherwise I want to share this new little life with everyone I love.

I do have to admit though, I felt a burst of that maternal instinct kick in with my first daughter.  I had several visitors at one time in the hospital and just began to feel really overwhelmed.  I think my mom sensed this and was like, 'Okay! I think it's time for us to go and let you rest.' 

You have to do what you feel comfortable with and if that means getting used to your new surroundings with a little, that is perfectly okay!

Eddy1

I am independent too despite being very close to my mom. I had no desire to have her come stay with us. I wanted to learn on my own and I wanted H to be very involved in the process as well.

I don't mind visitors but I didn't want them to stay long. A day or two for out of towners. Then come back when we have gotten settled. It worked out great.

This is what we plan to do this time around as well .H take a couple weeks off and we start to introduce the new little one to our family.

Eliza12

Um... if you are crazy, I am too! I could have written this post.

 

Chellezy:

Is this my maternal insinct kicking in??

When my baby is born, this is how I would LIKE things to go.
-Baby is born in a hospital, the only person other than the doctors in the delivery room is my husband.
-Family can visit in small groups in the hospital.
-Go home. Stay home. Hide out with just my Hubby and my Baby.
I dont want visitors. I dont want to be bothered by constant phonecalls (Whos knows what kind of sleep ill get, dont call me! Ill call you!)
Do this for a month while we figure out a schedule and just bonding with baby alone.
Like, I think if someone shows up and wants to pick up and cuddle my new tiny baby I might loose it! Like, I just feel, dont come over, leave me alone, dont touch my baby, dont pick up my baby! I just want a few weeks ALONE with my baby and my husband in peace (or something like that).

Is this logical?! I just feel so protective of this child and baby isnt even here yet! I have this overwhealming sense of "this child is Mine."
Im also a super independant person by nature and want to do it alone with my husband and no other help unless I ask for it.
Am I crazy?