I'm pregnant with #2. DD#1 will be 6. As I have said many times, the things we did have for her we donated to a family in need soon after she outgrew them.
However, when I had DD#1 I was the only girl in my family to have a baby out of wed lock and it was very, um, hush hush. I had just turned 21 when my shower came around and my dad's side of the family is Persian and didn't really know how to handle this and my mom's side italian catholic. While everyone welcomed her with open arms and she is the light of their lives NOW when I had my first "shower" it was mostly just a few group of friends 20-21 year olds that just came to my mom's house and we had a cook out.
My mom did a lot but no one made it a huge deal. My mom ended up buying the travel system and bigger items and she is ultimately the one that told me about the family that needed them. I had originally planned to save everything to reuse as I had picked gender neutral items and my mom insisted we donate the items to this family.
Now, 6 years later, I am having an actual "shower" being thrown by my soon to be SIL ((still out of wed lock but I think since I went back to college and got my degree and did everything I set out to do, the families aren't as "weirded out," THAT AND .. we were told we wouldn't have a #2 and have been planning our wedding that will take place in September of this year))
All that being said, to each their own. Their is no right way, wrong way, backwards way, forwards way. If your sister wants to do this and you don't mind, let her. If she wants to do this and you feel awkward, tell her. Good Luck.
stajon:Easy!! Every baby should have a shower! They are all special and deserve to be welcomed by family and friends 1st 2nd or 5th...
This. I know if I were invited to someone's second baby shower, I would not be offended. It is, first and foremost, a celebration of the new baby to be born. I don't think that should be reserved for the first baby only. Just my opinion.