Mini vent- Do guys realize... ?

Spruce14

how many times we have sex with them when we're exhausted? And i'm talking pre TTC when there was no goal.

This morning DH asked me if we have anything to do tonight. He's tired cause he just started a big job. I said no nothing but a little you know what... he said "we'll see i'm pretty exhausted" I just felt like saying "stop being a wimp and suck it up!" haha. I mean he's been pretty good with all this TTC stuff but that just annoys me. Good thing we did EOD this cycle! 

Vonbabe

I feel his pain! We haven't BD since the 9th and I'm STILL tired!

kerryann22

Yes! I literally had to BEG my DH to have sex with me the other night (my O day). I did actually say, "I've had sex with you many a times where I was tired and not in the mood." hahah I did convince him, but it definitely wasn't one of our "best times!

That Icy Snowflake

BrazilianPeach:

To each his or her own but when that happens to me... I turn on a good movie and follow the motto "if you rub it, he will come"

 Never fails. A little teasing goes a long way LOL 

Exactly!

DH is (luckily) in the mood when I bring it up each time, but on the off chance he isn't, I stir things up a little bit and go elsewhere. Men want what is offered and they now can't have. Total magic. 

Shayliz

No, I don't push it if he's too tired, because I'd expect him to respect me if I was too tired. 

blp0118

BrazilianPeach:

To each his or her own but when that happens to me... I turn on a good movie and follow the motto "if you rub it, he will come" 

 Never fails. A little teasing goes a long way LOL 

Lol, love it!

Spruce14

BrazilianPeach:

To each his or her own but when that happens to me... I turn on a good movie and follow the motto "if you rub it, he will come" 

 Never fails. A little teasing goes a long way LOL 

 

That's usually the route I take if he's being grumpy... haha! 

karma&co

Give the poor guy a break. He was tired.

 

Spruce14

kerryann22:

Yes! I literally had to BEG my DH to have sex with me the other night (my O day). I did actually say, "I've had sex with you many a times where I was tired and not in the mood." hahah I did convince him, but it definitely wasn't one of our "best times!

I wanted to say it this morning but I figure i'm better off just going home and putting something sexy on rather than telling him it's time. Hopefully I won't have to resort to convincing him but i'll do what i have to do since it's probably O day for me- it's time for business!

SchruteBucks

Shayliz:

No, I don't push it if he's too tired, because I'd expect him to respect me if I was too tired. 

 This.  If we're not in the mood or too tired we don't do it whether I'm fertile or not.  I want sex to be enjoyable, not a chore  

Ladylec

If either of us are tired we just do the super quick version.

WiscoMom67

This post is making me feel a bit better... DH is on board with TTC, but I don't think he gets "the window," despite my explanation.  I think I will make him watch the video this weekend...

cookie280

Seriously, if the guy is too tired and exhausted not even a little teasing might help. MH comes home late every night now from work and he's exhausted he eats and knocks out. How can I get him out of his funk?? I feel bad for him and he's always complaining about his job, it's too demanding, he's always busy and doesn't even have time to eat lunch and on top of that, his whole body hurts, like he's falling apart!

 

I don't know what to do anymore.  Any suggestions? 

mrsjollybrown

cookie280:

Seriously, if the guy is too tired and exhausted not even a little teasing might help. MH comes home late every night now from work and he's exhausted he eats and knocks out. How can I get him out of his funk?? I feel bad for him and he's always complaining about his job, it's too demanding, he's always busy and doesn't even have time to eat lunch and on top of that, his whole body hurts, like he's falling apart!

 

I don't know what to do anymore.  Any suggestions? 

Tell him you can help him relax. Give him a massage or a bath. Cook dinner in something sexy. Fertile windows are NOT to missed. Lol. Send him dirty pics throughout the day. make it fun for him so that he doesn't feel like its more on top of stressful day but something to look forward to when he gets home. 

kerryann22

BrazilianPeach:

Spruce14:

kerryann22:

Yes! I literally had to BEG my DH to have sex with me the other night (my O day). I did actually say, "I've had sex with you many a times where I was tired and not in the mood." hahah I did convince him, but it definitely wasn't one of our "best times!

I wanted to say it this morning but I figure i'm better off just going home and putting something sexy on rather than telling him it's time. Hopefully I won't have to resort to convincing him but i'll do what i have to do since it's probably O day for me- it's time for business!

Don't say anything (begging = not sexy), just go to the bedroom alone. Mine feels totally left out if I am having fun on my own and shows up for duty right away! 

Agreed, it's not sexy...which is why I rarely do it but started to get frustrated that night. I'll try your suggestion next time! I never say anything about ovulating or my fertile window, but I don't think he "gets it." I just act like I REALLY want to, which usually gets him in the mood!

Spruce14

cookie280:

Seriously, if the guy is too tired and exhausted not even a little teasing might help. MH comes home late every night now from work and he's exhausted he eats and knocks out. How can I get him out of his funk?? I feel bad for him and he's always complaining about his job, it's too demanding, he's always busy and doesn't even have time to eat lunch and on top of that, his whole body hurts, like he's falling apart!

 

I don't know what to do anymore.  Any suggestions? 

That sucks. I know the feeling cause DH used to have a really demanding job and he didn't want to do ANYTHING when he got home but sleep. That was before we were TTC though so I didn't mind as much as I would now. Today is the first time while TTC that DH has said something about being tired- and i know i would be really frustrated if it was all the time. 

I once had a bath ready for DH when he got home- that worked well. But I guess hot baths while TTC isn't a great idea for sperm so maybe a shower. Whenever DH used to have a bad day I always talk to him about the bright side of things instead of just talking about the negative. It usually helps. You know like "at least you have a job, be grateful for what you have" etc etc. GL 

aprilh17

I guess I should consider myself very lucky that my DH is down for BDing anytime! lol Sometimes I am just NOT in the mood and it aggravates me that he always wants to. But when TTC this is definitely a plus

Mother Meghan

SchruteBucks:

Shayliz:

No, I don't push it if he's too tired, because I'd expect him to respect me if I was too tired. 

 This.  If we're not in the mood or too tired we don't do it whether I'm fertile or not.  I want sex to be enjoyable, not a chore  

I agree with all of this. I had planned on having sex last night but we got in bed and DH immediately fell asleep. We were both tired and while it was on my mind, I didn't have the heart to wake him.

I can understand how some are able to convince their DH, but that's just not what we do. To each their own.