My mom and Sam

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I know the pic is a bit wonky.

I also know now I need to contact someone to deal with this -- specifically my mom's incredible attachment to my son. But I've been talking about her, so I wanted to post a pic. I can't look at most of them, really. Talking to people who have lost someone very close to them has helped, but I have a very, very long way to go. 

jettagurl

Beautiful pic.  

Take care of you.  You must.  Whatever it takes, Sam needs you.  ((hugs)) I think of you often, and will keep you in my T&P. 

Yodajo

I see lots of love in that picture!

Your mom was beautiful.   

amiamish

Yodajo:

I see lots of love in that picture!

Your mom was beautiful.   

this is exactly what I was thinking when I opened the pic.

(((hugs))) 

hikerbeth

Yodajo:

I see lots of love in that picture!

Your mom was beautiful.   

ditto, ditto.

((hugs))

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Thank you. She was so beautiful and she loved my son beyond measure. 

ghm

I can look at a picture of her and feel the love radiating from her. She's beautiful. be easy on yourself and remember none of this is supposed to be easy. It's okay that you're struggling. I think talking to a therapist is a good start.

BubblyToes

Yodajo:

I see lots of love in that picture!

Your mom was beautiful.   

This.

They look alike.

You are in my thoughts. 

shopgirl78

What a sweet picture!  

Hugs to you and your family!  I know she is missed.  

MayorMcCheese000

Lovely. Your son sure does resemble her! Take care of yourself but allow yourself time to grieve, you obviously loved each other very much. I can't imagine what it feels like to lose a parent.

Mominator

The picture is beautiful! I can see the love that you Mom has for Sam in her eyes. I am so very sorry for your loss, I can't imagine dealing with what you are going through. I admire your strength. If you need anything or even just want to talk it out, I hope you know that we are all here for you.

docmay25

Love this picture.  It is so sweet.  Be gentle with yourself.  I never lost a parent, but after losing a child I know it is a process.  It takes time and having someone to talk to and help you thru that process can be helpful.  Also post here.  It helps to get it out and this can be a great outlet.  We are always here for you.  

jnicks19

Losing my Dad was the most awful thing I've ever experienced.  I cannot even fathom losing a child or spouse.  You can't even begin to imagine the loss until you go through it yourself.  I had lots of friends who were so caring etc but none had lost anyone closer than a grandparent (I'm not discounting that loss but none of my friends were super close with theirs) so while I appreciated their words and gestures I knew they had NO clue as to what I was really going through.  And like you, I found most comfort from the people who had been there.  It's a crappy club to belong to.

I just passed the 4 year mark and when I used to hear people say that it had been 3, 4, 9 years or whatever I felt like way more of a victim than them because my dad had JUST died.  I was in the thick of it.  But the reality is, is sucks for everyone no matter how far out it is.  I just last night listened to a voicemail from a cousin that called me on the 3 year anniversary of his death and bawled my eyes out.  I know you feel like you are in a hole of sadness and can't get out but eventually you'll find a day will get a little easier and you'll develop a new normal.  

Definitely use this as an outlet, I wish I would have more but since I'm not a super regular poster I felt sort of dumb.  There's quite a few of us who've been there and are more than happy to listen.  Hang in there.