When does it get hard?

Ruby_Soho

DS#2 is 3 weeks old now. Not to sound like a total douche but I'm wondering at what stage 2u2 becomes difficult. I've been lurking here for a long time and before he was born I was expecting to be struggling for some time.

So far, life with 2u2 is sweet. I'm still working on getting DS#2 into a routine but we have a vague one in place we're perfecting around him. DS#1 is a brilliant big brother. He's patient when I need to feed #2, he's gentle with him and not showing any signs of jealousy.

It's definitely busy and I definitely need to plan my days a lot better than I used to but overall I'm thoroughly enjoying it. I keep waiting to wake up one day and for sh!t to have hit the fan. Am I just lucky? Or does it get harder as they get older?

celiabwatson

My younger one is 5 weeks so I don't really have that much on you. But the thing that is hard for me is naptime. My older one has never been a good sleeper and needs help to go to sleep. Help comes in many different forms but I can't just put him down and walk away. Many days it seems like my baby is hungry etc right during the window when my older one needs to be put down for a nap, so I can't put her down and can't help him effectively with her right there etc etc. We had no nap today because I missed the window and then he crashed at 5:30 and is still asleep (I'm hoping he stays asleep all night but I'm not optimistic).

But other than that I agree, it's not nearly as hard as I thought it would be. 

NavyPilotWife

Having two mobile kids changes things.  They are constantly getting into everything, you have to deal with sharing toys or lack thereof, and there's little to no nap overlap.  Your DS1 is still pretty young...wait until he hits the terrible twos.

I thought the first 9 months were pretty easy.  It's more challenging to get stuff done around the house with two mobile kids.  It's wonderful to watch the girls play together, but they also get on each other's nerves from time to time.

12bailey18

Your second sentance cracked me up....LOL. I was also expecting it to be way harder than it actually is. However, I have noticed it's starting to get a lot more challenging because DD is out of that newborn stage. For example, I can't just lay her down while I tend to DS. She needs to be entertained now with things and is becoming more mobile. It's not "hard" but it definitely is keeping me on my toes more now than before.

LJR 84

I thought it was easy when ds was a newborn, too. That has definitely changed! For me, I think it started getting harder once ds was about 4 months. (and not sleeping as much!) I want to tear my hair out most days now. Of course, all kiddos are different though.

MamatoJackson

I have found that certain phases were difficult but overall it's not as challenging as I had anticipated.  I will say that the first month was really easy because DD slept all the time.  That came to a stop fairly quickly.  Of courtse a lot depends on sleeping.  Our DD still doesn't sleep through the night more than once every few weeks.  Lack of sleep is a challenge for me.

 

Also, DD dropped her second nap WAY too early at 7 months - I think mainly because her teething was keeping her up.  I have early teethers - She has 10 teeth already, 3 of which are molars.  Up until just a couple weeks ago, their naps didn't overlap.  So one of them was up literally all day which meant no down-time and a difficult time keeping up with cleaning, dishes, etc.

You'll have challenging periods and easy periods and I would recommend just enjoying the easy periods when you are having them. 

Qmommy

I think it's going to get more difficult when DD2 is mobile and awake more.  So far it's much easier than I thought it was going to be.  DD1 is a stellar big sister (but DD2 hasn't gotten into DD1's toys yet... hehe)  I have always believed that the newborn phase will be the easiest phase with having 2u2 until they are both potty trained.  

Mama Jan

For me it was when DS2 was 6mo-18mo.  Partly because DS2 was becoming mobile, partly because DS2 suddenly wanted to play and DS1 realized it wasn't all fun & games anymore  Then DS1 hit the 2's and 3's and DS2 hit the 2's and I hit the wall.  *sigh*

IRL I've never heard a mom of 2u2 think it was easy.  The newborn stage is completely different. But who knows, maybe you really are just lucky.

doubleOmommy

Right now is pretty darn challenging for me! DD is very difficult these days and DS cries anytime I walk away and is becoming mobile. They are not on the same nap schedule so I dont get a break. The newborn stage was super easy for me compared to where we are now!

etude de la vie

Ya I was thinking the same thing when DS was 3weeks! THEN....he woke up! He had an opinion, couldn't put himself to sleep yet, took 5 naps a day each only 30 min, easily woke up with Sound of the house (DD playing), wanted to play especailly with his sister's toys but couldnt get to them and cried and then he became mobile at 6.5-7 months! Now he is into everything and they fight over toys and snacks. DD is a texture sensitive kid and hardly ever put anything in her mouth as a baby but DS will eat or lick every single thing he can. Every piece of lint, crayon, leaf, dirt, you name it has to be picked up . With a toddler around im vacuuming and sweeping 2-3x a day. Overall With every stage what was hard becomes easier and you get a new set a challenges!

kcisthebombdotcom

1 year into it and still waiting for it to get hard. It hasn't yet. Busy? Yes. Hard? No, not overall. There's tough weeks when both kids are sick, but otherwise I wouldnt consider my life difficult when I had 2u2.

Unlike the pps I find 2 mobile kids easier. They can entertain each other for a bit so I can get housework done and they're not so needy anymore. Sure, they do have their tiffs over toys occasionally but nothing too bad (yet). Most of the time my oldest still interacts well with his younger sib.

I kind of like not havng overlapping naps for one on one time with each child. plus you get to appreciate how easy life with just 1 kid is. lol!

Ask me next year with a 3 and 2 year old and my answer may change. lol!

Ruby_Soho

Thank you ladies, for sharing all your experiences. I'm hoping it stays this good but you've definitely shown me that I shouldn't be resting on my laurels just yet :-)

delg23

KC_13:

1 year into it and still waiting for it to get hard. It hasn't yet. Busy? Yes. Hard? No, not overall. There's tough weeks when both kids are sick, but otherwise I wouldnt consider my life difficult when I had 2u2.

Unlike the pps I find 2 mobile kids easier. They can entertain each other for a bit so I can get housework done and they're not so needy anymore. Sure, they do have their tiffs over toys occasionally but nothing too bad (yet). Most of the time my oldest still interacts well with his younger sib.

I kind of like not havng overlapping naps for one on one time with each child. plus you get to appreciate how easy life with just 1 kid is. lol!

Ask me next year with a 3 and 2 year old and my answer may change. lol!

Ohh man I hope this is me!! So far I've been wondering the same thing as OP. I think partially my interpretation of it being easy is because DS#1 was very difficult from the very beginning. But every day I pray that DS#2 stays so angelic. But yes he is in the sleepy stage. However, I actually found DS#1 to be easier when he became mobile. Yes I had to watch him to keep him from getting hurt but he was cranky as an immobile baby & much happier w/ some freedom.  

LDQAM516

I think it gets harder the older they get!  Looking back...when they were both little and quiet was actually the easiest...like you are saying.  Right now...all they do is fight, steal toys and whine...and I consider my kids to be well mannered and good at listening.  They are just being kids, I know...but they are always competing with each other which I can't stand.  They are absolutely ANGELS by themselves...but once the other shows up...holy cow the claws come out!  I would say it started get more difficult when DD#1 started to talk more...so maybe 4 months ago. 

Bride2b2004

Funny, I was wondering the same thing as the OP.  I am amazed at what a great big brother DS2 is so far.  I heard the first 3 months with 2u2 were torture, so I was prepared, but so far so good (fx).  I am guessing mobility will offer its challenges?

WhitePicketFence

We've had some rough periods and some easy periods thus far but I don't really think it's been hard yet. DD2 is just starting to become more mobile (lots of rolling and trying to sit) so I'm sure things will start to become more difficult soon when I have 2 kids to chase after.

Echowysp

For me, things were super easy, smooth sailing until Ava started walking at 14 months.  Now, I feel like I'm constantly breaking up a fight, getting one kid out of trouble or having to clean up someone's mess.