lining up the duckies

scout426

So besides documenting things stbxh has done or said to me and actions that I have actually seen take place, what other things should I be looking into.  I started to look into his phone records but the amount of phone calls from random out of state numbers is overwhelming.  Is it worth the money to figure out who he was talking to?  He deleted everything from my computer but would it be worth paying to have the hard drive pulled and trying to find out what he was up to.  In all honestly i believe that a lot of his computer usage and phone usage is drug related.  As of right now he is passing drug test but I really believe he is still using.  The thought of him having unsupervised visits with his daughter is frightening.  

 

DHYGchica3

if it could prove his drug use then I'd say if you can hire someone to sort out all the data it would be worth it. Other wise I'd hire a private detective or try to find someone who could be a character witness and could provide proof of his drug use.

You may be able to get all txt records from the cell company if it is a phone under you own plan. Even if he deleted them, they should be able to pull everything up.

scout426

DHYGchica3:

if it could prove his drug use then I'd say if you can hire someone to sort out all the data it would be worth it. Other wise I'd hire a private detective or try to find someone who could be a character witness and could provide proof of his drug use.

You may be able to get all txt records from the cell company if it is a phone under you own plan. Even if he deleted them, they should be able to pull everything up.

The phone plan is in my name.  I went to att and there is no way for them to pull up text messages without his phone.  He put a security lock on his phone right after our dd was born.  He also later admitted to using "once or twice" around this time.  I have all these phone numbers that he calls all the time.  There is one that I asked about 5 months ago.  He told me it was his AA sponsor's sponsor in another state across the country.  Funny thing, he never actually attended a meeting since admitting he relapsed.  Before his relapse he would go to a few meetings a week.  He is still calling that number every few days.  

DHYGchica3

: They must need that little chip in the phone huh? Some companies don't need that. Ugh. Too bad there isn't some way to get a hold of the phone.

cmanmom

What about calling the numbers yourself?  From a different phone than your own?  Is that an option?

scout426

luckystarz:

cmanmom:

What about calling the numbers yourself?  From a different phone than your own?  Is that an option?

This. I did it when I first left and found out that STBXH had TONS of girls on the side. Of course he denies it all, but I had seen weird/suspicious texts in his phone and this just confirmed it to me. I just asked how they knew him b/c I was looking into some stuff. Most were forth coming, one was rude. It helped me and I wrote the names next to the numbers on the cell bill and gave it to my atty. I am in a no fault state, but it still speaks to his character. He was seeing other women when his wife was pg, in the hospital giving birth and after, as well as when we had a nb. Disgusting. 

 

I'm getting close to doing this with the local numbers.  As far as the other numbers he's been calling 3 so far have been linked to a new drug called bath salts.  I have been pretty sure for awhile that this was what his problem was.  Now if only I can find out where he is having the drugs delivered to. (they come in the us mail)