How to make 12 month old more gentle with infant?

jgoetz:)

Hi there.  DD is 15 weeks old and she just started going to daycare at my friend's house who is a SAHM. Her son is 12 months old and has already hit and bitten DD.  I was very upset by this and am thinking about taking her somewhere else now but in the meantime am looking for suggestions as to how to teach her 12 month old how to be more gentle with her.  She said she had him in timeout most of the day and this doesn't seem to be too effective.  Any ideas?

kcisthebombdotcom

I taught my son "nice-nice" around that age. Starting at around 11 months, I taught him to lightly pet me/the dogs/cats. When he would do nice, I would offer a ton of praise. He pet my DD like a dog (still does, lol!) but it keeps him from hitting.

When he entered a hitting stage, I wouldnt punish him but I'd remove myself/the baby from the area he was in. Since we have a lot of baby gates up, I'd just move somewhere where he couldnt get to. I'd shower the baby with attention and ignore DS. I'd go back after a minute or so. If he hit again, I repeated the process. Pretty quickly he caught on that hitting=being ignored and he stopped doing it.

jgoetz1

That makes sense.  Thanks for the tips!

beyoga

Thanks for posting this.  I have a 3 month old dd and a preemie that is 12 months adjusted.  He scratches her face sometimes and other times he's very loving.  He doesn't quite get it yet.  

starb4long

12 month old babies barely even understand the word "no," they do on some levels, but they don't have any control over their compulsions.  So time outs will not work.  I like the idea of positive praise and just taking the little one out when the other gets too rough.