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TTC after 35
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Riley crossed the Rainbow Bridge today

Mrs.McIrishMrs.McIrish member
in TTC after 35

I am beyond heartbroken. 

 We thought he was doing so well with the fluids. But when I came home last night he was walking into things and I figured out that my baby could no longer see.  I googled renal failure in cats and they can have hypertension that causes the retina to detach causing sudden blindness. DH and I agonized over the decision but made the appt this am to let him go.  I slept (should say stayed with him as I didn't sleep) in the family room all night.  He was doing amazingly well for just losing his sight as he seemed to memorize the places in the kitchen for his water bowl etc with out crashing into things. He felt with his paw for his cushion on the floor where he liked to sleep.  But his litter box was upstairs and I didn't want him trying to go up there so I moved his litter box downstairs and showed him where it was. I must have dozed off because at one point I woke up and he was gone. I went to look for him and found him upstairs using a second empty litter box.  Despite my baby being blind, he walked up the stairs and still used an empty litter box to pee. Even on the brink of death, he was being "proper".

He had some hamburger as his last meal and licked my hand. It broke my heart to bring him in today but it wasn't fair to him anymore so I had to take on the pain and let him out of his. I hope he is running around tonight playing with my childhood animals.

I will love him forever and he brought such joy to my life. I was barely an adult when I got him at 21 and I don't know how to move forward tomorrow without him.

Thanks for everyone's good wishes and concern about him in the past week and a half.

TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

imageimage

SAIF/PAIF Welcome


http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

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Re: Riley crossed the Rainbow Bridge today

  • brooklynesquebrooklynesque member
    I'm so sorry, McIrish.  It's so hard to put a beloved pet to sleep.  May Riley rest in peace.
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  • happywifemomofonehappywifemomofone member
    McIrish-I am so sorry to hear about your Riley.  Know how hard it is to say goodbye to our precious fur babies....May he play on the grounds of Heaven until he can rest in your arms again. T & P with you during this difficult time.
    TTC since 10/09 Me-43 DH-44 RE and testing 10/10-11/10, Recommending IVF 1/11 New RE AMA and DOR-DH low motility IVF #1.1 cancelled 3/11 due to poor response IVF #1.2 May 2011, one perfect 8-cell embryo, 3dt-BFN, IVF #2.1 Converted to IUI d/t poor response. New RE 9/2011. IVF 2.2 completed using HGH,EPP,DHEA, Q-10 and accupuncture. Transferred one 8-cell, grade one embryo on 10/19. BFP 10/31/11 Chemical pregancy on 11/2/11. Started stims for IVF #3, our final try, on 12-2-11. ET on 12/18. Transferred 3 Grade A embryos-BFFN Planning DE IVF, late March/early April- Donors ER expected to be 4/2-4/4. PAIF/SAIF welcome
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  • Amyaggie97Amyaggie97
    I am so sorry, it is so hard to lose a pet. 
    Me- 37, DH- 32. TTC- June 2010- Adoption journey started April 2012 image
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  • gundy21gundy21 member

    So sorry to read this.  I hope you find comfort in all the memories of your time with him and peace that he is no longer hurting.

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  • LlamamamaLlamamama member
    I am so sorry.  Your description of his last meal brought me to tears.  I know you deeply loved him and I believe he also knows that.  I am sure he is happy now..no longer trapped in his discomfort.  You did the right thing.  The most loving thing that you could do for him.
    Me: 40 Dh: 41, TTC since August 2009, began Acupuncture and Herbs Sept 2011, began Temping and Charting Nov 2011. image
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  • Nita14701Nita14701 member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how hard it can be to loose such an important part of your life.  Sending warm thoughts your way.
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  • mtlaurelmtlaurel
    Big hus, McIrish. I am sure that he had a wonderful life with you, and am glad that you had each other for so long - though I know it could never feel like long enough.
    TTC #1 since June 2010
    Me: 36, DH: 42
    Dx: DOR and MFI

    DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
    Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal

    IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
    IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
    DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
    DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!

    SAIFW/PAIFW
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  • tfkre8ivetfkre8ive member
    I'm so sorry, I'm crying for your loss. I will be devastated when we have to make such a decision for my kitties. Again, I'm sorry.
    Baby #1 due 2/10/14!
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  • pillowasspillowass member
    I am so sorry for your loss. Like the others said, you gave him a wonderful (and long!) life that most cats would envy. Take care of yourself ((hugs))
    image


    TTC #2 since July 2010
    FSH = 11 (20 on day 10 of CCCT)/ AMH = .98 / AFC=12ish
    5 IUI's with oral meds = all BFN
    March 2012 IVF (MDL Protocol) Started stims 3/3; ER 3/11 (9R, 8M, 7F) ET 3/16 (5dt of 2 blasts graded 3AB and 3BA, 3 frosties(!!) Beta 3/26 = 386; Beta 3/28 = 827; u/s 4/11 says TWINS! Boy/Girl Twins delivered at 36 weeks 6 days

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  • Country Girl in the CityCountry Girl in the City
    I am so sorry for your loss.
    BFP on IVF #2 6/29/2012. Beta #1 7/3 = 522; Beta #2 = 1180; Beta #3 = 6491 image BabyFruit Ticker
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  • steverstever member

    ::ticker and siggy pic::

     

     

     

    I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I've been following your posts about your sweet boy and am so terribly sad to hear that he's passed. 

    I'm crying and want to give you a big hug. Here's to hoping your Riley enjoys a snooze in some sunlight with my precious kitty that died almost 3 years ago. 

    Left HugRight Hug 

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  • lhcooperlhcooper member

    SIGGY WARNING

     

     

    Hi McIrish -- your post has made me cry.  I am so sorry.  I am also so glad you got a little more time with him, and it sounds like it was a very gentle good-bye.  I'm sure he's chasing mice and birds and smelling wild catnip right now.  

    Thinking of you.

    me - 41 (dx: DOR); DH - 53 (no problems); 7/18/09 - married!; 8/4/09 - BFP on first (real)try; 9/14/09 - missed m/c; 9/15/09 - d&c; 11/09 - 3/10 - 4 natural cycles = BFN; 4/10 - dx hyperthyroidism caused by Graves' disease; 6/10 - thyroidectomy; 7/10 - 12/10 - 1 natural and 5 medicated IUI cycles = BFN; 1/11 - new RE; dx low ovarian reserve (AMH .42; 1/26/11 -- BFP (ectopic) from IUI #6; methotrexate 2/10/11; 6/2/11 - IVF #1 = BFN; 9/12/11 - prescreening for DE; 9/15/11 - IUI #7 (unmedicated)= BFN; 11/8 - begin DE cycle (shared risk program); 12/5 - ER (5 eggs/4 mature/3 fertilized/2 left by day 5) 12/10 - ET of one 1BB blast (expanded, "fair" quality), none to freeze; 12/22 - totally shocked by +hpt; beta #1 = 413; #2 = 3952 2/14 - CVS reveals a healthy baby girl! EDD: 8/27/12 DD born 8/31/12, 10 lbs 10 oz and perfect in every way. 
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  • owlprofowlprof member
    I'm so sorry, McIrish.  I'm glad that you got a few extra days with Riley and got to make sure that he was comfortable at the end.
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  • irishgirl0525irishgirl0525 member

    I'm so sorry McIrish.  I'm glad you were able to get some extra time with him in the last week and a half.  Sounds like Riley wasn't quite ready to go back then either and wanted to take some time to spend with you and DH. I'm tearing up writing this.

    I'm so sorry.

    TTC since 3/2010. Me 41, DH-49. After 3 years, 6 IUIs and several IVFs we have finally have our beautiful baby girl, born on 11/7/13.



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  • kat1221kat1221 member

    I am so very sorry.

    I know how hard that is.

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  • NuggetJoNuggetJo

    Ticker warning:::

     

    I am so so sorry, I cannot even imagine the sadness you are feeling right now but you know you did the best for your Riley and that's what matters. I am sendin you thoughts and prayers. 

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  • ELF4321ELF4321 member
    Crying for you right now sweetie.   I'm so sorry.


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  • Roxie5739Roxie5739 member
    RIP Riley ......

    Multiple ectopics, 2 failed IVF's
    IVF #1: Did not get to ET, embies all failed PGD (major chromosomal defects)
    IVF #2: We have 2 chromosomally perfect embies as a result of PGD (Boy/Girl) 1 failed the thaw (Girl) Transferred 1, yet ended as a c/p
    Thought it was the end of our TTC Journey 6/20/2012
    SHOCK BFP 9/28/2012: IT'S A BOY! and everything is normal !!!!!!

    Little A born 38w 2d on 05/23/13 and is a true miracle for this IF Vet!
     

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  • Temp556193750005695Temp556193750005695
    I'm so sorry for your loss.  Losing a pet is always hard.  I'll be keeping you in my prayers.
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  • winidpuwinidpu
    Your post made me tear up. Reminded me of when I had to put my last pet down. My thoughts and prayers are w/ you. It's always such a hard thing to go through. Your baby is in a better place. Running and playing w/ the other cats w/ her sight and all her faculties chasing lizards and having fun. Hang in there. It does get easier day by day.
    TTC #1 since 2/10 Me 38 FSH 12.9 & AMH 0.16 DH 47, low sperm count due to meds. 07/11 We have sperm! 28 million, 70% motility, morphology 1% normal. 08/14/11 1st IUI unmedicated BFN. 09/11/11 2nd IUI w/ Femara + trigger BFN 10/14/11 trigger & Final IUI 10/16/11 BFN 10/21/11 Started acupuncture and loving it! 01/21 ET one embryo 6 cell grade C. Beta 02/02. BFN. Taking a much needed break. image
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  • Maybe JoleisaMaybe Joleisa member
    So sorry for your loss.  I hope you can find peace knowing that he is no longer in any pain and you did what was best for him.

    image
    TTC since 10/2010
    IUIs # 1-5 = BFFN
    IVF # 1(July 2012) = BFN
    IVF # 2 (November 2012) = BFP (MIssed MC D&C @ 8w3d on 1/10/13)
    IVF # 3 (June 2013) = BFN 
    IVF # 4 (September 2013) = BFP Fraternal twin boys! (Loss at 21w6d due to IC on 1/26/14...devastated.)
    3/21/14--TAC (transabdominal cerclage) w/Dr. Davis in NJ
    IVF # 5 (May 2014) = BFN
    FET (August 2014) = BFN

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  • Bubs711Bubs711
    I am so, so sorry for your loss.  It sounds like at least you were able to help him know he was very loved before he crossed the Rainbow Bridge. 
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  • aurora1974aurora1974 member

    Ticker warning

     I am so so sorry for your loss.  Sending you lots of hugs.

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  • AbeilleAbeille member
    I am sorry to here this. It's so hard to lose a pet.
    Me: 38, PCOS/ DH: 37

    DD born 12.21.09, conceived w/ injects and IUI



    TTC#2 since Nov 2011

    BFP 2.6.12 m/c 6w5d | BFP 5.25.12 c/p

    -Back to the RE-

    3 medicated IUIs, all BFN

    -Taking a break from treatment-

    BFP 11.20.12 ~ EDD 7.28.13

    image image

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  • shyntrueshyntrue

    Ticker Warning

    I'm so sorry for your loss McIrish!  I remember when we had to put down my first dog.  He wagged his tail at us and licked our hands.... Like he was saying "It's OK" 

    Whenever we have lost an animal, it always helps me to think of them up there together playing with each other and sitting on my grandma's lap.

    Sending you (((Big HUGS)))

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  • 10-4LilBuddy10-4LilBuddy member
    I am so sorry.  Your kitty was lucky to have such a loving mommy.  
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  • CheezeFaceCheezeFace member
    I'm so sorry.  My thoughts are with you.
    ~Married 11/08~
    ~TTC since 01/09~
    ~SA & B/W - 06/09 - Normal~
    ~Encouraged by OB to "just keep trying" 06/09 - 06/10 (oh, the wasted time)~
    ~HSG - 08/10 - Clear/Normal~
    ~Lapo - 01/11 - Normal~
    ~Clomid 50mg, Trigger shot, Prometrium - 01/11, 02/11, 03/11~
    ~BFN - 02/11~
    ~IUI #1 03/15/11~
    BFP 3/28/2011
    Diagnosed with GD at 28 weeks. Controlled through diet and exercise. No insulin.
    Diagnosed with Cholestasis of pregnancy @ 36 weeks.
    Delivered via C-section @ 36 weeks on 11/9/11.

    TTC#2 for a few months naturally (ha!)
    ~IUI#1, Clomid, Trigger,  10/13 - BFN
    ~IUI#2, Femera, Ovidrel, 11/13




    image




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  • bridekimmiebridekimmie

    ****ticker warning****

    So sorry McIrish.  You are in my prayers!!!  Sad

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  • lmydogallylmydogally
    :(. I'm so sorry. 
    IVF#1 May 2011 15 Eggs Retrieved, 11 Fertilized using ICSI + HPT on 6/9/11 Beta #1 420 Beta #2 2167 US 7/1 TWINS!! Due 2/18/2012 Brooke and Nora born at 35.6 weeks Jan 20th 2012
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  • XV11StarXV11Star member
    Oh what a smart kitty Riley was, to have picked you to be his person!  You showed him so much love and compassion... My heart goes out to you as you grieve his passing.  :'(
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  • benoitfanbenoitfan member
    Oh mcIrish, I am so sorry.  It is never easy to say goodbye to a pet that loves you unconditionally and is there for you whenever you need them.  I know you know, you did the right thing and Riley is watching over you and waiting for the day when you are reunited (many, many years from now).  I hope you find peace in knowing Riley is back to his playful self and has no health issues or physical challenges in heaven.  RIP Riley. ((HUGS)) to you McIrish.
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  • MelleTXMelleTX member

    I'm so sorry sweetie. I cannot imagine how difficult this is for you. Many, many hugs to you.

    Single Mother by Choice. Life didn't work out the way I planned so I did it on my own. IUI #s 1-3, unmedicated = BFN, IUI #s 4-6, 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel = BFN IVF #1: 23R, 20M, 17F. 5 day transfer 2 blasts. 2 Snowbabies BFP 6dp5dt, Beta #1 7dp5dt = 58, Beta #2 9dp5dt = 114, Beta #3 10dp5dt = 187 1st Ultrasound = 5/3, not much to see yet. 2nd Ultrasound = 5/17, TWINS!!! Hospital Bed Rest at 32 weeks due to pre-ecclampsia and severe edema. Audrey Grace, 5lbs9oz, & Lydia Louise, 6lbs, born via emergency c-section on 12/6/12 at 36w1d My IVF Journey
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  • SaintCitySaintCity

    RIP sweet, sweet Riley.

    The tears are flowing.  I am so very sorry for the loss of your beloved Riley.  I can't imagine how hard it was for you the spend that last night with him.  He has been a constant in your life for so long.  I have my own "Riley" that I've had since I was 29.  She's my 'girl' and i know it will be virtually impossible for me when her time comes.  Many hugs!  Left Hug

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  • KZ2010KZ2010
    Oh, McIrish, I'm so very sorry for your loss.  I have been there and can empathize with how difficult and painful that decision is to make.  Big hugs to you. 
    m/c at 6 wks 2002
    Endometriosis, s/p lap 2009
    Behcet's disease, s/p partial vulvectomy 2010
    Started bromocriptine to lower prolactin level 2010
    Clear HSG 11/2010 :)
    DH morphology = 4, rest of SA looked good 01/2011
    02/2011 First Clomid 50mg cycle
    BFP 03/02/2011
    No heartbeat at 10w5d 04/18/2011; D&C 04/23/2011
    07/2011 Second Clomid 50mg cycle, BFN
    08/2011 Third Clomid 50mg cycle, BFN
    10/2011 First Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = BFN
    11/2011 Second Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = BFN
    12/2011 Third Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = BFFN
    01/2012 Fourth Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = ?
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  • MAtoNCMAtoNC member
    I am so sorry for your loss. Your story on this post was heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time. hugs.
    Married 4/12/08 DS born 11/17/2009 via c-section at 39 weeks. 11/12/2011 BFP #2!! m/c 7w5d. 2/28/2012 BFP #3 Beta #1-12dpo = 18; Beta #2-16dpo = 185; Beta #3-18dpo = 505. EDD 11/10/2012. Ectopic discovered at 5w4d. D&C followed by methotrexate.
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  • Haribo1Haribo1

    ****Siggy and ticker warning ****

     

     

     

     

    I am so so so so sorry.  I wish I had the words to comfort you and cannot imagine your pain.  I hope this link gives you some comfort. It is from my favorite rescue group, Small Paws. Thinking and praying for you.  Riley was so blessed to have you as his momma.

    https://www.audirsch.com/mizpah/PetsOne.html 

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  • amandaleigh1amandaleigh1 member
    I am so sorry. ((big hugs))

    IVF #1 ET 1 d3 embryo 10/30/11 BFP
    3 Embryos frozen (1 d5, 2 d6)

    DS born 07/29/12

    FET #1 ET 1 d5 embryo 02/10/15 BFN

    FET #2 1 d6 embryo didn't survive thaw, transferred last d6. CP :(

     image
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  • mkwtmkwt member
    Oh sweetie, I am so sorry (((hugs)))
    http://tinyurl.com/bj29y4p
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  • jb2rnjb2rn member

    ++ticker++

    Oh, I am crying reading this. I am so sorry for the loss of your baby boy. much love to you xoxo

    b/w=FSH 15.6, AMH 0.4 surprise natural BFP on 3/12/11
    DS born via unplanned C-section at 40w6d

    image

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  • BeckyP005BeckyP005 member

    As if I haven't cried enough the past few days I am again crying. I am so so very sorry to hear about Riley. Like other pp have said I am sure he is up above climbing tress and is pain free. I hope he meets all of our animals that we have owned that has passed. Maybe they even have their own "community" like we do. Take care and you did the right thing. HUGS

    ME:46 MH:44 DE IVF 2014
    Met with RE 4/11. 2 IUI's BFN. DE best option. Switched clinics to do "shared" program. Had to retake all tests and a mamm that put me behind and then on a DE waiting list for 12 months. Picked a donor!! (10/13/13) Got matched. Estimated transfer in December. After 2.5 years of patiently waiting I will finally cycle....can hardly believe it. DE cycle got cancelled. One of her tests came back positive.  Waiting for another donor. Donor picked!! (1/18/14)

    DE IVF #1 (4/26) BFN  DE FET #1 (6/4) BFP! Beta 1=339 Beta 2=852 Beta 3=9957 EDD 2/22/15!!


     

     

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