I can't make this sh!t up..
JCGreene85
member
Ex leaves me a voice mail saying he has something very important to tell me. So I call him back and he tells me that he wasn't going to tell me, but he got a job and started on Tuesday. He told me that if I told my lawyer he would deny everything and lie about it. Basically he doesn't want his CS to go up.
Apparently he wants to make a deal with me. He wants 90 days to pay his arrears balance plus he'll start to pay his current CS amount. At the end of the 90 days he will start to pay the original amount in our support order before we modified it. I seriously think he's crazy.
1. In our CO it says he is to notify his lawyer immediately if he gets a job so we can reconfigure CS amounts.
2. Why would I trust him to actually pay the amount he "says" he is going to.
3. He never said anything about the $100 a month he owes me for back support or the over $500 he owes me just for past hospital bills he hasn't paid.
If your EX called you with this "agreement" how would you handle it? I never agreed or disagreed mainly because I was in the car with DS and didn't want to argue with EX. I said a lot of "uh huh", "OKs" and "I see's". I am interested to see what my lawyer says tomorrow. He is trying to be in control and I want to make sure I handle it correctly.
TIA!
Re: I can't make this sh!t up..
Follow the CO. Log that he told you he started a new job so when he fails to tell his lawyer and the court, you can demonstrate how far back they should recalculate if necessary.
Your stbxh is so predictable it's scary.
Obviously no deals, especially if they use the word deals. I would defiantly let my lawyer know, as well as let them know any details about the job that he told you.
I don't even trust the word "agreement." I am glad that you kept your replies neutral well. Good move!
I feel when ever they "offer" something it is there way of thinking they can nice you into gaining control over something again. I have even had situations where I had to put stipulations in place, XH agreed, and then a day later went off on the part he didn't like, wouldn't agree and made court threats.
All through lawyers is my motto now.
Because he claimed to have something important to tell me and since he never calls I was interested in what he had to say. I didn't entertain anything, I listened.
My XH does the same thing. Starts off like that, with something worthy of telling me, then it's "oh, while I have you..." and into the manipulation and abuse. It's hard to find the line of being civil yet not allowing him enough rope to play his game. I completely know where you're coming from.
THIS!!! Follow the CO to the "T". Don't get sucked into the "I have something important to tell you" line. We've all heard it. Been there, done that, got the sticker. ::yawn::
JC-you really need to read up on manipulation because you're still falling for his BS, hook, line, and sinker. I just read "Who's Pulling YOUR Strings: Breaking the Cycle of Manipulation" and I highly recommend it. You need to put your foot down with him otherwise you're in for a long 16.75 years to come.
Just because I listened to what he had to say doesn't mean I am falling for his manipulation. I was never going to agree to this and I've already spoken to my laywer. I have followed the CO since day and I have no intention of straying from it no matter what he sends my way.
All I asked was for you ladies to tell me how you would handle the situation. I am smart enough not to fall for his B/S anymore.