The First Few Days of Breastfeeding!

Happily Overwhelmed

Looking for a bit of advice.

I had my son late Tuesday night. We just got home from the hospital. The first night of breastfeeding (right after birth) went pretty well. He looked to be a natural at latching and such. He was circumsized the next day and all hell somewhat broke loose there. He was in tylenol-coma for most of the day and didn't wake up to feed. I had about 4-5 nurses through the time of his circumsion and coming home. Each one had different views and I felt like someone was constantly pushing me to have my boob out to a very uninterested (and unresponsive) baby.

Today he's better but feedings hurt so bad! I met with the lactation nurse this morning and she was impressed with his latch. But also said it shouldn't be hurting at all. He's really good at opening wide and having his lips out (like the "fish face"). Beyond this I feel like a bad mother if he's not always at my breast. The lacation nurse did say at his last feeding in the hospital that he looked like he was using me more for a pacifier than eating then.

So...here's my questions:

#1---Is breastfeeding truly "not supposed to hurt"? I'm wondering if I'm just getting used to the process and that's why it hurts or if he's not latching properly.

#2---Anyone have a guideline on how often LO should be having a feeding and how long it should take? This seems like a difficult question. He's had more than the required poops and pees per day. I know he's not starving. But wonder if I'm forcing the boob at him too much and then getting used as a pacifier (and getting more and more sore, frusterated, and exhausted).

#3---Do you personally feel like "nipple confusion" is a big issue? I've always been "anti-pacifier" but now I long to stick one in his mouth. We live 45 minutes from the hospital/his doctors/my doctors and he SCREAMS in his car seat. With all our appointments and the length of driving I'd love to give him a pacifier.

#4---Do things get better when your milk comes in. Or is it no different?

OurJellybean

Till my milk cane in lo was constantly at my breast and screaming between feeds. I had so much pressure to supplement but I never did. I felt the more they sucked the more milk I would produce and it's natural. My nipples hurt a lot, I don't see how they couldn't the first bit when your not use to something sucking on them all day. It usually hurt the most the first ten sec of latch then got better. At 3 weeks pp it doesn't hurt at all but it took time. Its a lot easier once your milk comes in so hang in there! I'm still antipacifer, babes are meant to suck a lot to help establish your supply but it gets better and eventually they nurse much less frequently for less time. If u do use a paci wait till ur supply is established or a few weeks. Really there is no need to use one cuz breastfeeding should be sufficient enough. Sometimes they cluster feed and that's ok too.

erikaplustim

I will answer number one.

IT HURTS!!! Breastfeeding is a learning process. It is kind of like breaking in a pair of new shoes. It hurts at first but after awhile you don't even notice it. Part of it might be a bad latch but it takes time for momma and baby to figure things out.

blu-eyedwife

#1---Is breastfeeding truly "not supposed to hurt"? I'm wondering if I'm just getting used to the process and that's why it hurts or if he's not latching properly. Does it hurt the entire time he's feeding or just in the beginning?  One of the lactation counselors who ran one of the classes I took described it as "ow ow ow-ahhhhhhh."  The initial latching on can be painful because it's a new feeling, but once things start going the pain should ease up.  Otherwise, if his latch is really good, you might want to have him checked for some other mouth issue that could be affecting his latch from the inside and causing pain.

#2---Anyone have a guideline on how often LO should be having a feeding and how long it should take? This seems like a difficult question. He's had more than the required poops and pees per day. I know he's not starving. But wonder if I'm forcing the boob at him too much and then getting used as a pacifier (and getting more and more sore, frusterated, and exhausted). It's going to be different for every person.  In the very very beginning (at the hospital) my guy was not a great eater.  He would latch on and look at me like "okay lady, turn the tap on."  A couple of compressions in and he'd eat, but his eating took a while and I'd have to coax him throughout because he'd fall asleep or hang out.  I feel like the first couple of weeks he was doing every 2 hours during the day and I was waking him every 3 hours at night because he did not want to get up and eat.

#3---Do you personally feel like "nipple confusion" is a big issue? I've always been "anti-pacifier" but now I long to stick one in his mouth. We live 45 minutes from the hospital/his doctors/my doctors and he SCREAMS in his car seat. With all our appointments and the length of driving I'd love to give him a pacifier. I'm not the best to answer this question because we waited 3 weeks to introduce the pacifier, but I know others have introduced sooner without an issue.

#4---Do things get better when your milk comes in. Or is it no different?I didn't notice a difference when my milk came in in terms of his feeding.  I got really engorged - including in my tail of spence, so I was a little uncomfortable but it didn't last very long.  I didn't have nipple soreness though, so I don't know if that gets better/worse/stays the same.

gabriella78

I'll answer #4 first.  Yes, things do get better when your milk comes in. Much better!

#1 For me, it hurt at first.  My nipples were raw and there was some bleeding. I used lanolin after every feeding and that helped a lot. Your body has to get used to breastfeeding, so it will most likely hurt for awhile and then it'll get better. 

#2 Unsure how to answer except to say that if he'll take your breast, he's probably hungry. Nursing is hard work at first for the baby and you, so I don't think you can force the boob on him if he's not interested.

#3 Never had an issue with nipple confusion. We didn't start pacifiers until about 3 weeks old when he wanted something to suck on and I walked around a store with my pinkie finger in his mouth for half an hour. After that we got some pacifiers, the Green Soothie ones, and have been fine ever since.

Good luck!

 

MommaA117

1- It hurt a LOT for me at first. Like knives. It gets better. DD's latch was ok too. It just took time.

2. My DD ate/eats on demand and in the beginning she ate VERY often. Sometimes every 30 minutes, sometimes every hour. Usually 2 hours at the most in the beginning. I fed from both sides per feed to establish a good supply and she ate maybe 10-15 minutes a side. As they get older that time gets shorter and you can only do one side if you choose.

3. We never had nipple confuson but my DD never really liked a paci and only got a pumped bottle after maybe 5 weeks...

4. It gets WAY better when you get it down. I LOVE BF'ing now and I promise when you overcome the first few weeks-month or so it will get really easy. To me it is WAY easier than if I would FF.

uncharch7

I'll answer what I can since we have issues...

It hurts. It now hurts worse for me because of a shallow latch.

Are you noticing any swallows? I can't tell with DS, but the LC confirmed yesterday that DS isn't really eating, again an issue with latch for us.

We are using a paci right now. It's only been 12 hours, but so far no issues. He gets supplements by bottle and I've noticed a big latch improvement with the shield. 

Fisherman'sWife

Happily Overwhelmed:

#1---Is breastfeeding truly "not supposed to hurt"?  - It sounds like you have had the latch checked and its probably just hurting because you are getting used to breastfeeding.  This takes about 3 weeks.  Try cold packs to help sooth soreness between feedings. 

#2---Anyone have a guideline on how often LO should be having a feeding and how long it should take?   We fed our LO about every 2 hours (start to start).  It would take her 30-40 minutes to nurse.  She would scream if we pulled her off before that.  So yes, that means, nursing session #1 starts at noon, finishes around 12:45 and the next session would start by 2.  Sometimes she would only make it 1.5 hour between feedings. 

#3---Do you personally feel like "nipple confusion" is a big issue?  You just have to play this one by ear.  We tried to give LO the paci when she was a few days old and she wouldn't really take it.  We did start a bottle once a day when she was about 2 weeks old and never had any confusion. 

#4---Do things get better when your milk comes in. Or is it no different? Yes things get better!!!

ns1

1. Yes, it hurts.  One of the pedis who came in likened it to going barefoot at the beginning of summer - your feet have to get calloused before it doesn't hurt.  Same idea.

2. I think every LO is different.  It seems like it was every couple of hours for DD at the beginning.  I wouldn't force it though if you don't think he's not hungry.  If he's not swallowing, he's probably done (unless he wakes up soon after hungry...).  For swallowing, the best thing I read was to listen for a "keh" sound.

3. We waited 2 or 3 weeks to introduce a pacifier, no issues there, but I don't know about any earlier.  Probably depends on the baby too! 

4. I think things were about the same when my milk came in.  Just engorged and in pain!  Ugh! I think some of the best advice I got in the hospital was to "keep doing what you're doing" when you get home and your milk comes in.

Also, at first I felt I was getting a lot of different advice from everywhere (drs, online, etc.) and it was so confusing.  There's no one right answer for each baby / mom.  Take in some sound advice, but ultimately, trust your baby and your body.

lijuan09

You and I are having some of the same issues, so I can't answer all the questions.  But I will respond to #3 - my LO was given a soothie at the hospital nursery without my knowledge/permission.  He was about 2 days old.  I was LIVID because we were having trouble with latching anyway.  But the nurse who gave it to him actually turned out to be my favorite because she seemed to "get" what I was going through and helped me formulate a plan.  Anywho, we have not had trouble with nipple confusion at all.  I think the soothie and the bottles we used while I was EPing for a few days may have actually helped him learn how to latch.  Now he'll take the soothie occasionally, like when he's gassy and fussy or during a diaper change. But he still knows how to get the milk out!  

GL!

AprilAngie

#1---Is breastfeeding truly "not supposed to hurt"? I'm wondering if I'm just getting used to the process and that's why it hurts or if he's not latching properly.

 

nursed all three of my kids- no it doesn't hurt unless you are doing it worng and have a bad latch- that said until your nipples toughen up - it is a weird feeling- and it is a lot of pressure if that even describes it. 

#2---Anyone have a guideline on how often LO should be having a feeding and how long it should take? This seems like a difficult question. He's had more than the required poops and pees per day. I know he's not starving. But wonder if I'm forcing the boob at him too much and then getting used as a pacifier (and getting more and more sore, frusterated, and exhausted).

 

depending on the baby- but I find a NB feeds usually 2- min.- 1 hours 

If he is pooping and peeing he is taking in enough 

#3---Do you personally feel like "nipple confusion" is a big issue? I've always been "anti-pacifier" but now I long to stick one in his mouth. We live 45 minutes from the hospital/his doctors/my doctors and he SCREAMS in his car seat. With all our appointments and the length of driving I'd love to give him a pacifier.

I would give him the pacifier.   when I had my 2nd child we did exclussive breast and he never took a bottle at all - took us 7 months it was hell as I had a medical condition and had to wean him

#4---Do things get better when your milk comes in. Or is it no different?Totally better.  baby eats better- you will know when your milk comes in- you will be full and might be engorged - you may need a pump to releive

 

good luck 

JosephsSweetie

#1---Is breastfeeding truly "not supposed to hurt"? I'm wondering if I'm just getting used to the process and that's why it hurts or if he's not latching properly.

It hurt for the first 6 weeks to some degree. The first three weeks I had bloody, cracked nipples on and off and used a nipple shield for part of the time. Between 4-6 weeks, it would only hurt for the initial latch. After about 6 weeks, no pain whatsoever. LO had a very strong latch from the very beginning.

#2---Anyone have a guideline on how often LO should be having a feeding and how long it should take? This seems like a difficult question. He's had more than the required poops and pees per day. I know he's not starving. But wonder if I'm forcing the boob at him too much and then getting used as a pacifier (and getting more and more sore, frusterated, and exhausted).

After coming home from the hospital, feedings took about an hour. I'd get about 90 minutes off, then another hour feeding. I fed him as often as he wanted and still do. EBF babies can't overeat.

#3---Do you personally feel like "nipple confusion" is a big issue? I've always been "anti-pacifier" but now I long to stick one in his mouth. We live 45 minutes from the hospital/his doctors/my doctors and he SCREAMS in his car seat. With all our appointments and the length of driving I'd love to give him a pacifier.

I gave him a pacifier at 2 weeks, but he really didn't like it and use it regularly until about 12 weeks. Every baby is different. We introduced a bottle for pumped milk at 4 weeks and he took it with no issues, and we've never had a "nipple confusion" problem.

#4---Do things get better when your milk comes in. Or is it no different?

Yes, it gets better when your milk comes in, but in my experience not WAY better until after 3 weeks or so, then again around 6 weeks. Using a nipple shield for some nursing sessions can really help take the edge off of the pain. I used it when I couldn't stand the pain any longer, and it helped get me through. He didn't nurse as well with it, but you need to do what you have to do to stick with it those first few weeks and come out of it pain-free on the other side! Just remind yourself why you're doing it and that it WILL get better. TONS better. Good luck!

sarteratops

Happily Overwhelmed:

#1---I would love to meet the person who can breastfeed and not have an ounce of pain from day one! Yes, it does hurt at first. It take a while to get used to. Just make sure that he takes as much of the nipple as he can and it should hurt less. The first 6 weeks had me clenching my teeth most of the time when he fed, but it gets SO much better after that.

#2---The first few weeks he's going to be eating all the time. We were feeding almost every hour except at night when we'd sleep 3-4 hours. It is exhausting, but just feed when he is hungry. One trick that worked with us is when we'd put a knuckle in his mouth he'd suck real hard when he was hungry. If he just chewed and gently sucked he just wanted to soothe.

#3---Nipple confusion was never an issue with us, but DS would never take a paci. He's great with the bottle, but always prefers the boobie.

#4---Things get SO much easier but it does take time. IMO, it took about 6 weeks for us to both get into a groove where we were happy and it was no big deal. They go through a couple growth spurts that up your supply and are sort of tough to get through, but once that's over with it's smooth sailing. 

I remember when we first started out I was in tears almost every day and wanted to quit. It never helps hearing "it gets easier" because it doesn't help you at all in your current situation. My best piece of advice is just to take it one day at a time. I set short term goals for myself like "we'll just get through today and see how tomorrow goes." Then a day turned into a week, a week turned into a month... it's so worth it in the long run. You don't have to deal with expensive formula, spend the time preparing and washing bottles, and once LO gets more independent it's a great way to make him cuddle with you  GOOD LUCK!!

alli&dan

#1. It hurts. Your nipples aren't used to being treated like that! Between the nipple pain and uterine contractions, I was constantly taking Tylenol or Ibuprofen in the first week. Then, when your milk comes in it feels like someone crammed a bunch of golf balls in your boobs until your supply regulates. Not trying to scare you, just trying to let you know what to expect!

2# As long as he wants. It took me awhile to realize when DD was done actively eating. She would start to do short fluttery little sucks at the end of a session and start to fall asleep when she was full and didn't want to eat anymore.

 3# See question 2! Once I realized DD was using me as a human paci I started giving her a pacifier. She also hates the car seat. She actually cries anytime I put her snow suit on her because she knows it's time for the carseat. She only likes NUK pacifiers but has had absolutely no problems with any bottles we've used--Dr Browns, Avent, Evenflow, Playtex Ventaire. She'll use them all.

4# I'd say things get better once the milk comes in and regulates and then progressively better after that. It didn't become easy for us until 8 weeks.

aspade

Try some music in the car.  Poor baby!  What a long ride!

If you think you might be having issues with latch, positively do not try a pacifier.  It's too early.

You've got plenty of wet and poopy diapers, so good going!

Be sure to get your baby checked for tongue-tie--it does affect about 10% of babies, and it can be not severe enough to affect feedings (maybe posterior) but still bad enough that it means pain for you.  It's a little snip, and you'll see an immediate difference (in other words, don't let a pedi tell you "your baby will grow out of it," etc.).  I do agree that's there a little normal soreness at the beginning, but it shouldn't hurt the whole time.  And it shouldn't be "clench your teeth" bad.

When your milk comes in, you'll be able to hear swallowing, which might alleviate some of your worries.

You're doing a great job already--hang in there!  There is a learning curve. 

TeaForMe

I'm probably late with this and I don't consider myself an expert at all, but here are a couple things I read in my early BF days

1. This quote : "If you rub any part of your body for 30 minutes at a time every 1-2 hours, of course it will be sore." What a cruel joke of nature that one of the most sensitive parts of the body is made for near-perpetual suckling for a period of time. Poor design, if you ask me   My babe had a perfect latch from birth but it still was definitely uncomfortable and I had sore/irritated nipples for the first month or two (as others have said).

 2. It isn't possible to nurse too much. It is possible to nurse too little. I took this and ran with it the first few weeks and nursed the ever-loving crap out of my child. Pretty much any time he cried or seemed unhappy or anything, I assumed he was hungry. Which was pretty much constantly. And from what I understand, that's pretty much par for the course with newborns.

Yes, it may take over an hour to feed for the first month or two and he may be hungry immediately after a feeding and you will feel like all you do is nurse, but believe everyone when they say it won't be like that forever. Try to enjoy the time as much as possible - kick back and catch up on some seasons of TV or find a new show. Read a few books. Simply stare at your beautiful child. Learn to crochet/knit. Learn to type 1-handed and post advice on message boards