I am bored and nervous. Somebody confess something.

L L CG

And make it juicy!

atlantic

Someone told me last week that their sister had triplets and got to the point where she couldn't wipe herself. It's now become my greatest fear.

L L CG

atlantic:

Someone told me last week that their sister had triplets and got to the point where she couldn't wipe herself. It's now become my greatest fear.

Ha!  I would fear that, as well!

So, how'd she manage?? 

atlantic

I'm assuming someone wiped her! I'm pretty extroverted with my husband but I do NOT want to go there.

kellenickle

L L CG:

atlantic:

Someone told me last week that their sister had triplets and got to the point where she couldn't wipe herself. It's now become my greatest fear.

Ha!  I would fear that, as well!

So, how'd she manage?? 

For future reference

MrsAJL

Heidi Klum and I had crazy hot lesbian sex last night in my dream.

L L CG

kellenickle:

L L CG:

atlantic:

Someone told me last week that their sister had triplets and got to the point where she couldn't wipe herself. It's now become my greatest fear.

Ha!  I would fear that, as well!

So, how'd she manage?? 

For future reference

GENIUS!! 

L L CG

MrsAJL:

Heidi Klum and I had crazy hot lesbian sex last night in my dream.

LUCKY! 

felinity

It took some effort, but I was able to maintain the hygiene of my nether regions all the way to 37 weeks, carrying over 14 lbs of twins. My feet, on the other hand... I couldn't reach them. 

atlantic

kellenickle:

L L CG:

atlantic:

Someone told me last week that their sister had triplets and got to the point where she couldn't wipe herself. It's now become my greatest fear.

Ha!  I would fear that, as well!

So, how'd she manage?? 

For future reference

Ohhh....mahhh...gawd. Ew, ew, ew!!!! I'm scared to read the reviews!

 Okay...

"so I tried a shoe horn. swiffer handle and curved stick"

 "I suggest you buy one for an obese family member or aged parent. It makes a thoughtful and useful gift. " -- ummm...awkward?

and this gem...  . "As a result I became morbidly obese. Soon the children in the neighborhood would call me sticky pants and my least favorite, skid row. My confidence was slowly eroding away until I found this amazing invention. For the first couple of years my mother didn't not mind cleaning and taking care of my anal area until my dad found out he was out really my father. He had my mother deported for being an illegal alien. I thought I was going to be stuck being called stinky boom boom pants and skid row for the rest of my life. Then I found this miracle invention."

 

Ok..i'm done, can't read anymore

ETA: Can't stop... And I also got my revenge on the school children that made fun of me and all with the help of this product. I called up their mothers and told them I had some old comics they were welcome to take but they had to come over and get them because I can't afford the jaws of life to help me get out of my front door so it seemed believable. When the children walked in I smacked them in the face with my freshly used butt buddy. My fecal matter was all over their faces including little billys golden hair, thats what he gets for poking me with a stick all those days my knees buckled under my own weight and I was unable to get up.

Taytee

I had a rather obese patient ask me to wipe her. I asked how she managed at home since she said she lived alone. She told me she just put a bunch of toilet paper on the side of the toilet rib and rubbed back and forth until the TP came clean. This more than explained the raging UTI she was being admitted to the hospital for.

 

molliedb

i confess that i already confessed my only secret to you like a month (or TWO?!) ago and i STILL cant post about it because its STILL a secret.  dammit.

L L CG

molliedb:

i confess that i already confessed my only secret to you like a month (or TWO?!) ago and i STILL cant post about it because its STILL a secret.  dammit.

Hmm.  This is not a secret that can be kept forever.  The beans need to be spilled!  Or spilt! 

MrsAJL

Taytee:

I had a rather obese patient ask me to wipe her. I asked how she managed at home since she said she lived alone. She told me she just put a bunch of toilet paper on the side of the toilet rib and rubbed back and forth until the TP came clean. This more than explained the raging UTI she was being admitted to the hospital for.

 

That is both really ick and really sad.

FireChiefsBride

L L CG:

molliedb:

i confess that i already confessed my only secret to you like a month (or TWO?!) ago and i STILL cant post about it because its STILL a secret.  dammit.

Hmm.  This is not a secret that can be kept forever.  The beans need to be spilled!  Or spilt! 

I NEED to know!  Bc you now have about 56 people that think you're KU.

And I got ripped off last night.  I had a nightmare that I was murdered.

My confession: While I am getting some work done, I'm also running out of internet.  Not juicy, but the only good stuff I can think of is sex-related and I'm sureasshit not going to post that on the internet. 

agran

I sooooo did not need to know about the Bottom Buddy. 

I have nothing exciting to confess... other than we're driving around in my husband's grandmother's 1988 Oldsmobile 88 and I really want to throw gang signs when we're around the courthouse.  At least now I fit in. 

L L CG

FireChiefsBride:

L L CG:

molliedb:

i confess that i already confessed my only secret to you like a month (or TWO?!) ago and i STILL cant post about it because its STILL a secret.  dammit.

Hmm.  This is not a secret that can be kept forever.  The beans need to be spilled!  Or spilt! 

I NEED to know!  Bc you now have about 56 people that think you're KU.

And I got ripped off last night.  I had a nightmare that I was murdered.

My confession: While I am getting some work done, I'm also running out of internet.  Not juicy, but the only good stuff I can think of is sex-related and I'm sureasshit not going to post that on the internet. 

She isn't KU, I promise.  Tell me about the ripping off.  Who's ass needs kicking?? 

FireChiefsBride

L L CG:

She isn't KU, I promise.  Tell me about the ripping off.  Who's ass needs kicking?? 

I have no idea. It was a crazy person from outside that got into the building where I was that was supposed to be locked- I ran but couldn't hide.  He stabbed me to death.  I should not go outside anymore today.  Except to shop.  

Nessia

I've been off all week and have been the opposite of productive. I need to clean out the kids toys, put away the tree, laundry, and lots of stuff for work. I've done none of that but have cleaned out the DVR. 

KSandAE2008

I have 2 1/2 days left at my job and my motivation is very, very low!

I have baby fever bad. BAD!

molliedb

FireChiefsBride:

I NEED to know!  Bc you now have about 56 people that think you're KU.

 

not a icicle's chance in hell of that.  and its not not exactly my secret to tell (i mean obvs i'm not great at it since lisa knows) or i WOULD.

 

and frankly its entirely possible i spilled the beans to you around halloween?  i'm terrible at secrets.

michelleaxo

molliedb:

FireChiefsBride:

I NEED to know!  Bc you now have about 56 people that think you're KU.

 

not a icicle's chance in hell of that.  and its not not exactly my secret to tell (i mean obvs i'm not great at it since lisa knows) or i WOULD.

 

and frankly its entirely possible i spilled the beans to you around halloween?  i'm terrible at secrets.

LOL  If you were KU again, you would have a whole helluva lot of confessing to do. Now I'm dying to know your secret.

Taytee

agran:

I sooooo did not need to know about the Bottom Buddy. 

I have nothing exciting to confess... other than we're driving around in my husband's grandmother's 1988 Oldsmobile 88 and I really want to throw gang signs when we're around the courthouse.  At least now I fit in. 

I think I love you!

GuavaGal

I found out today that my XH is engaged. He called my mom a few weeks ago, and told her. He told her he was going to send me a letter (?!) but she asked him to wait until after the holidays. I don't care that he's engaged, and in fact the only part of this that annoys me is that he called my mom and that she asked him to wait to tell me. As if I couldn't handle the news! Ugh.

sundot

I did it: breast lift with implants. Surgery was yesterday morning and I am recuperating...I'm sore but not in pain. My "Girls" are HUGE but I have been assured that this is swelling and it is normal. I am excited for the big unveiling when everything has healed--not for another two weeks.  I have my 24 hour followup in one hour and I have to get dressed...(sorry for my scattered thoughts--I wanted to participate and share

L L CG

sundot:

I did it: breast lift with implants. Surgery was yesterday morning and I am recuperating...I'm sore but not in pain. My "Girls" are HUGE but I have been assured that this is swelling and it is normal. I am excited for the big unveiling when everything has healed--not for another two weeks.  I have my 24 hour followup in one hour and I have to get dressed...(sorry for my scattered thoughts--I wanted to participate and share

NICE!!!!  Congrats!  I am super jealous!

I want to see a before and after pic! 

Taytee

L L CG:

sundot:

I did it: breast lift with implants. Surgery was yesterday morning and I am recuperating...I'm sore but not in pain. My "Girls" are HUGE but I have been assured that this is swelling and it is normal. I am excited for the big unveiling when everything has healed--not for another two weeks.  I have my 24 hour followup in one hour and I have to get dressed...(sorry for my scattered thoughts--I wanted to participate and share

NICE!!!!  Congrats!  I am super jealous!

I want to see a before and after pic! 

DITTO! and sundot wins the confession post

MrsAJL

sundot:

I did it: breast lift with implants. Surgery was yesterday morning and I am recuperating...I'm sore but not in pain. My "Girls" are HUGE but I have been assured that this is swelling and it is normal. I am excited for the big unveiling when everything has healed--not for another two weeks.  I have my 24 hour followup in one hour and I have to get dressed...(sorry for my scattered thoughts--I wanted to participate and share

Awesome!! I want to do this so bad.

sundot

Taytee:

L L CG:

sundot:

I did it: breast lift with implants. Surgery was yesterday morning and I am recuperating...I'm sore but not in pain. My "Girls" are HUGE but I have been assured that this is swelling and it is normal. I am excited for the big unveiling when everything has healed--not for another two weeks.  I have my 24 hour followup in one hour and I have to get dressed...(sorry for my scattered thoughts--I wanted to participate and share

NICE!!!!  Congrats!  I am super jealous!

I want to see a before and after pic! 

DITTO! and sundot wins the confession post

1. No one is allowed to be jealous until this is over. Until I have perfect, young, firm boobies again! I am really, really sore--like I was in a car accident sore. It hurts to move. I can't drive for at least 10 days. I can't lift anything greater than 10# for four to six weeks. This is really tough.

2. I win "the confession post?" How awesome! I rarely win anything!

3. And, the win is important because...dd used to much toilet paper today and flooded our upstairs and downstairs when the potty overflowed...carpet damage and ceiling damage (ugh);and, wait for it,

4. two of three kids have pink eye! ACK! And they are enrolled in a day camp today and tomorrow. They had a wonderful time today and I really need them away from me. Add on the trip to the pedi and I'm just not a happy camper...again, no one can be jealous until this is over!

 

MrsMillerTime

sundot:

I did it: breast lift with implants. Surgery was yesterday morning and I am recuperating...I'm sore but not in pain. My "Girls" are HUGE but I have been assured that this is swelling and it is normal. I am excited for the big unveiling when everything has healed--not for another two weeks.  I have my 24 hour followup in one hour and I have to get dressed...(sorry for my scattered thoughts--I wanted to participate and share

I'm glad to hear surgery went well!!  How was the appointment today? 

sundot

It was perect. Everyone is really happy with my results and my progress. I am most definitely swollen and I'm hurting, though!!

MrsMillerTime

sundot:

It was perect. Everyone is really happy with my results and my progress. I am most definitely swollen and I'm hurting, though!!

I hear ya.  The elephant on your chest will go away in a couple days and it won't be so hard to breathe anymore.  That was the worst part for me...just feeling like I was constantly out of breath.  Just keep up the massages - they hurt like hell but are sosososo important.