tantrums or struggles getting ready in the AM?

kadensmama09

DS had a tantrum of epic proportions this morning.I am at work feeling really guilty about how I handled it, and I'm wondering how others might handle this situation with their LOs.

Part of the issue is probably that DS does not go to DC cosistently, he is there two days a week, and goes with my MIL the other day. I know if he were there 5 days a week, the whole transition in the morning would be a bit more structured and go a little smoother. I take him on Wed mornings and DH takes him Tuesdays, which also makes things a little chaotic, because I have to be to work so early on Wednesdays, and we have to be up and out of the house in an hour and a half, whereas if DH takes him, he doesn't take him until 9:30 or 10 and he gets to hang out and play for a bit.

This morning, he woke up acting kind of sassy, and I knew it would be a hard morning. I told him that if he got dressed and we got ready for daycare, that I would give him a small xmas cookie for being such a good boy (I don't usually bribe him, but it was what I had this morning). I did make sure we watched some Yo Gabba and played together for a bit, but when it was time to go upstairs and get dressed, he lost it. I had his clothes out and he kept screaming "No" and throwing a complete tantrum. I told him he needed to calm down and stay in his room until he did so, and then we could get ready. I closed the door to his room (Not sure why I did that, that may have been my big mistake) and he just kept screaming and yelling and going ballistic. I was starting to get anxious about being late for work (I had a new client this morning, and I was already running way behind), and I basically held him down and put his clothes on while he hit, screamed and scratched me. I was trying to remain calm and I just picked him up and carried him outside and out him in the car. Once in his car seat, he cried for a bit and calmed down, and then of course asked for his cookie. I explained to him why he did not earn the cookie.

What would you have done in this situation? What do you do when your LO is resistant to getting ready to go in the morning, and you really have to go?

jenn_darrin1515

we have definitly had our share of morning tantrums and late work arrivals...

When I get the girls up, they don't even get to leave their room until they get changed...I find this helps b/c 1. they are usually still a little too sleepy to fight me and 2. b/c they know to do anything else (get milk, a fav toy, whatever...they HAVE to first get dressed)...I also always offer them a choice between 2 outfits so they have some control over what they wear...occasionally if we have time I even let them pick out their own...not to say I haven't sent them to school in pj's or wrestled them into an outfit on occassion....and I have carried my fair share of screaming toddlers to and from the car....always a good time!

Our morning routine tho is very streamlined...I get myself ready (in 15 min) go in, get them up, changed, brush teeth and everyone down the stairs for milk/coats/maybe 5 minutes of playtime...from start to finish we are out hte door within 45 min of me waking up....

kadensmama09

jenn_darrin1515:

we have definitly had our share of morning tantrums and late work arrivals...

When I get the girls up, they don't even get to leave their room until they get changed...I find this helps b/c 1. they are usually still a little too sleepy to fight me and 2. b/c they know to do anything else (get milk, a fav toy, whatever...they HAVE to first get dressed)...I also always offer them a choice between 2 outfits so they have some control over what they wear...occasionally if we have time I even let them pick out their own...not to say I haven't sent them to school in pj's or wrestled them into an outfit on occassion....and I have carried my fair share of screaming toddlers to and from the car....always a good time!

Our morning routine tho is very streamlined...I get myself ready (in 15 min) go in, get them up, changed, brush teeth and everyone down the stairs for milk/coats/maybe 5 minutes of playtime...from start to finish we are out hte door within 45 min of me waking up....

wow! I am so completely envious of this, I need to seriously figure out a way to implement way more structure into our morning routine.

clee2009

I agree that getting them dressed right away helps a ton. It is hard to do this with a baby to take care of but the best mornings for us are the ones were DD wakes up and gets dressed as soon as she goes potty. Then since we are in the bathroom I brush her hair and teeth and she is free to do what she wants until it is time to go.

 I probably would have done the same thing in your situation. I have carried a kicking and screaming toddler to the car before as well and I agree it is no fun! We will all survive in the end

monlyn9

I don't get DS up until I am ready to go. I have found that if I turn Bob the Builder (we have a bunch on the DVR) on the TV in our bedroom before I get DS out of bed I can then bring him into our bedroom with his clothes, lay him on the bed and change him without him really even noticing what I am doing. The key is the half asleep state! I then bring the toothbrush to him and brush his teeth on the bed (he doesn't spit anything out yet). The show is only about 12 minutes long so when it is over we get coats on and load up.

The last couple of mornings have been more difficult because he wants to play with his train table that he got for Christmas but we managed with less screaming today than we had yesterday. 

meldoo2002

I get up at 6:15, get myself ready and them up at 6:45.  We are out the door by 7:05.  And it's 3 days a week so it's not totally consistent either.  As soon as they come out of their room the tv is on, but only on Sesame St. which they don't love so it's not like they are begging to watch a whole show.  If I started something they really liked it would be too hard to pull them away.

 I dress them as they stand there and watch t.v.  I make them each run to the bathroom, brush their teeth, and off we go.  I do their shoes, but they do their own coats.  

 If I encounter a morning like you did... which does still happen I would do what you did and force him through it. Sorry mommy has to get to work.