advice is needed please

bunnyc1246

So I need some advice on my current situation. Currently I am not legally married to Westons dad. He lives with us of course, and pays for half of all the bills. Were doing very bad relationship wise, and he cant seem to change. I feel like a single mom as it is, im the one who consistantly takes and picks weston up, i do the whole night time bed routine, and the only thing he does is make is night bottle, doesnt feed him, just makes it. So my question for you guys is after bit^7hing at him constantly and nagging about what he needs to do, should i stay or should i go? Im going this afternoon to talk with my pastor, but I know what she is going to say already. I need to stay and work it out. I have got so much on my plate, i work full time, go to school online, im a mom, a home owner, and everything we have is in my name. This is another thing ive considered, if he moves out, how would I afford to pay everything... I have both vehicles in my name, the house, the cable, utilities, EVERYTHING. any advice is appreciated

achase123

Whether or not you should stay or go is NOT a decision that can be made by a bunch of e-strangers based on a background of the relationship that consists of one paragraph.

Him not helping you enough seems like a mild enough complaint, in all honesty, but I am sure there is more to the story.

All I can tell you is, as far as logistics (expenses, etc.) you can and WILL find a way to work it all out, if you decide that leaving is in your and LO's best interest.

msualum96

I'm a lurker, but my situation is VERY similar to yours...in fact, I could have written your post almost word-for-word...

Of course there may be a lot more to your story, but I can tell you that for the 1st 6 months of my LOs life, we were constantly at each others throats.  The stress of a newborn on 2 people that had no idea what they were doing caused so much resentment that there were at least 2 times that we fought so badly that I kicked him out, and he left for 2-3 days.  We were both so tired & overwhelmed that we just weren't communicating our needs to one other.  It was bad.  My aunt is a lawyer, so I consulted her, got paperwork to have LOs last name changed to mine, researched child support & custody, etc.  I informed him of all this, we fought more...

Without getting into ALL the gory details, we have continued to work on things, and are currently together with a very sweet one year old that we both love dearly!  Things have gotten infinitely better since I let go of my "expectations" so to speak, and we've settled into our "roles" as parents.  But YOU have to be willing & able to do that in your situation, no one can help you make that decision. 

PLEASE feel free to send me a PM if you'd like to chat more!