Enlighten me :)

sarakiefer

What's the difference between EP and EBF?  I seem to be getting some judgment about only pumping.  DS and I tried nursing and all it did was frustrate both of us.  The act of him being directly on the breast isn't something that's important to me.  The breastmilk is what has all the nutrients that I want LO to have.  Breastmilk is breastmilk right?

jlsimon56

I've asked this too since I pump at work and nurse at home, so I'm neither.  The concensus was that EBF meant ONLY breastmilk, in whatever form. 

Some take it a bit farther to exclude solids/food.  So if your LO gets breastmilk and solids, you are no longer EBF.  But some people don't count that - they mean for the E to imply no formula, but food is ok.

Who is passing judgment on you?  Tell them to take a hike.

sytom

It sure is!!! 

In my opinion, EP is double the trouble and double the work!  Don't listen for a second to those judging you!  Still in my opinion, you need to do what makes you and your baby happy.  Quality time is a lot better than EBF if it's not going well. 

quickstepstar

I think it is awesome that you can EP. I admire your dedication to it! I tried it with my older twins, and failed miserably. I am EBFing this one (she does get a pumped bottle about every other day, but I still consider it EBFing). Whoever if judging you should try it for themselves then talk.

tokenhoser

Because your baby is only 2 weeks old, people may be encouraging you to keep trying at breastfeeding directly because it's so much easier in the long haul. EP-ing is a huge task to keep up week after week, month after month. Breastfeeding is really rough for the first few weeks, and then gets much easier.

It's not necessarily judgment, it's just people concerned you're taking the easier route now and ending up on the harder road.

sarakiefer

tokenhoser:

Because your baby is only 2 weeks old, people may be encouraging you to keep trying at breastfeeding directly because it's so much easier in the long haul. EP-ing is a huge task to keep up week after week, month after month. Breastfeeding is really rough for the first few weeks, and then gets much easier.

It's not necessarily judgment, it's just people concerned you're taking the easier route now and ending up on the harder road.

Why will pumping be harder down the road?  Imo, pumping and nursing are both kind of annoying.  Pumping seems to be easier for me, at least for now.   

tokenhoser

sarakiefer:

tokenhoser:

Because your baby is only 2 weeks old, people may be encouraging you to keep trying at breastfeeding directly because it's so much easier in the long haul. EP-ing is a huge task to keep up week after week, month after month. Breastfeeding is really rough for the first few weeks, and then gets much easier.

It's not necessarily judgment, it's just people concerned you're taking the easier route now and ending up on the harder road.

Why will pumping be harder down the road?  Imo, pumping and nursing are both kind of annoying.  Pumping seems to be easier for me, at least for now.   

Pumping moms tend to have more problems with supply over the long term. Pumping stays the amount of effort it is for you now - it takes ~20 minutes per session, you have to wash parts and bottles, someone has to feed the baby in addition to the time it takes to pump.

Right now, for me, breastfeeding is pretty effortless. LO eats for 5-10 minutes, nothing to wash or prep or bring when we go out. It's been that way since about 3 months, and it's great. 

It is absolutely your choice as a mom to do what works for you, your baby, your life. But it's not judgment to encourage you to keep trying - it's just knowing that EP is not as easy as it seems in the heat of the newborn moment.

jlsimon56

Ohhhhhh I missed the part where your LO is only 2 weeks old.  And I agree with PP that people may just be trying to help by offering the suggestion to try BFing over EPing.  If I didn't have to pump, I would throw my pump out the window and never look back.  It suuuuuucks. 

My LO wakes once in the night still and I would shoot myself in the foot if I had to go prep a bottle. 

EPing works for some, don't get me wrong.  If that is what works for you, then run with it.  Who are the people who are judging you?

sarakiefer

jlsimon56:

Ohhhhhh I missed the part where your LO is only 2 weeks old.  And I agree with PP that people may just be trying to help by offering the suggestion to try BFing over EPing.  If I didn't have to pump, I would throw my pump out the window and never look back.  It suuuuuucks. 

My LO wakes once in the night still and I would shoot myself in the foot if I had to go prep a bottle. 

EPing works for some, don't get me wrong.  If that is what works for you, then run with it.  Who are the people who are judging you?

Some of my family and rude people that come up to me and ask if I'm breastfeeding who I barely know.  My dad in particular was very disappointed in the fact that I'm EP and keeps comparing me to my mom, who had 4 kids (including twins) and "if she can do it then you can too".  My dad is one of those people that tries to tell me how to live my life and his way is the only right way to go about things.  He said that DS and I won't be as bonded, etc.  But he isn't the only one.

I know the difference between judgement and people giving advice, but some of these old school people just can't believe I'm not feeding him directly from my breast and I end up having to explain myself.  I know it's no one's business, but the situation is awkward.  Not to mention, I don't really care for the "stick with it, it will get easier" stuff.  I don't WANT to do it.  It's not worth the stress of us both getting frustrated when there is an alternative method and LO still gets what he needs.

tokenhoser

In person judging is even sillier than online, especially (IMO) from men. That sucks.

Do what works for you, but get used to letting "advice" roll off you. Feeding is just one decision that you as a parent make but everyone and their dog wants to discuss with you. Try to just change the subject - "Oh, look, he's so cute when he's sleeping".

ejagk

As a mom who EP's and has since my DD was 1 week old, I can relate to what you're going through in regards to the frustration. My DD was struggling to latch because she would wake up and want to eat immediately. There was no time to whip out the boob or calm her down- she wanted food.

I agree with PPs that it is the harder road to EP for the long haul, but I think the beginning was the hardest, IMO. Pumping every 2-3 hours for 10-15 minutes day & night, plus feeding DD was definitely a struggle. As time went on and she got older, I was able to stretch out my sessions (once she was about 7 weeks old). I used to pump at least 8 times in a 24 hour period. Now that DD is almost 4 months, I pump 4 times during the day and once at night. Pumping has gotten a lot easier in regard to the time spent pumping.

 A few tricks I've picked up along the way to save time is to buy extra sets of pump stuff. I have 4 complete sets of flanges, connectors, etc. and extra bottles. This allows me to wash what I've used if I want to or to just use a new set at each pumping. We stick everything in the dishwasher each night, so it is clean for my night session and the next day. I also have a hands-free pumping bra which allows me to feed DD while I pump if I want to, or to do other things.

In the end, it is up to you what you want to do. While I think actually BF may have been easier in the long run, EP is what works for our family. As long as you are happy and baby is happy, then you are doing the right thing!