how to pose as a catholic?

jewelbride07

i really hope this doesn't offend anyone who is catholic:

DH and i were asked to be godparents for our friends son.  We are not catholic but its required for one of us to be catholic in order to stand up at the baptism as the godparents.  My friend told us we have to go to a class and get a certificate before they can schedule the baptism but we'll have to "pose" as catholics at the class.  I really don't want to lie to a priest!  What do they ask you at these classes?  I know nothing about the Catholic religion so have no idea how to "pose" as one.  Any one help? 

Sorry, I'm sure this sounds really lame but my friend seems to think it's no big deal.  I'd just be mortified if they figured out we were trying to "pose".

Meg41208

I'm Catholic, and not even a strict one, and I really don't see that as no big deal.  At least one of the godparents has to be Catholic.  It has to do with the guidance that you will provide the child through its life, pertaining to religion. 

GASuzuki

I'm Catholic... I'm as clueless as they come, so I guess you could just go and be like, "I'm not practicing..." or "It's been a loooong time since I went to church!" I dunno about lying to a priest, though. I'd be scared, but that's years of guilt drummed into me.

JulieC53

I'm not sure "posing" will help.  My church checks both God-Parents to make sure one is catholic.  One of my God-parents will be asked what parish they belong to and then the priest will check with that parish to make sure they are an active member.  Not sure you can get around this one. 

MamaMyers22

They will probably ask to see your certificate of baptism.  It depends on the church but there are lot of rules and regulations. Some are more strict than others. 

The whole point of being Godparents in the Catholic Church is to continue the childs religious upbringing  and education should something happen to the parents.  I don't see why the parents would pick someone who is not Catholic, doens't make a whole lot of sense.

rachi

I do not understand why they would pick you being that you are not Catholic. ::ponders::

I don't think this is something you should or could be able to "pose."

pretty_helmet

You will need a certificate of baptism issued by the Catholic church in order to be the child's official religious godparent.  The Catholic church keeps a registry of all Catholic baptisms.  If you are not on the national database of certificants or do not have a certificate of Holy Communion you cannot be recognized by their church as the godparent.

I agree with PP in that as practicing Catholics the parents should have picked someone who is also Catholic, not someone outside of the church. 

jewelbride07

thanks ladies - i'm glad everyone seems to agree with me.  i feel awful about faking it.  i'll have to tell them its not possible to fake it!

dmogmo

Doubtful this will work. Like pp said, you'll probably need to produce a baptism certificate. ?And btw, I don't agree that this is "not a big deal," if that's the rule then they shouldn't try to work around it imo.

BananaPancake

Wow, yeah, that would be a huge disservice to the child as well as truly wrong on the part of the parents. I would tell them to find someone else to pretend to care about the kid's spiritual life, preferably someone who understands the Catholic faith, because they obviously do not.

 

kada626

You should be fine. If they ask say one of you was baptized catholic but you don't attend a church regularly. I don't think they are going to grill you on it though. Good luck!

MTB05

MamaMyers22:

 I don't see why the parents would pick someone who is not Catholic, doens't make a whole lot of sense.

Ditto!  The whole point of Godparents for baptism is to promise to help raise the child in the Catholic faith.  How is she expecting you to do that when you are not even Catholic yourself?  I know that many priests are okay with it if at least one of the Godparents are Catholic, but lying to a Priest....yikes!  Talk about "Catholic" guilt!  : )

 

MamaMyers22

BananaPancake:

Wow, yeah, that would be a huge disservice to the child as well as truly wrong on the part of the parents. I would tell them to find someone else to pretend to care about the kid's spiritual life, preferably someone who understands the Catholic faith, because they obviously do not.

 

::golf claps:: I agree with you 100%! 

pretty_helmet

kada626:

You should be fine. If they ask say one of you was baptized catholic but you don't attend a church regularly. I don't think they are going to grill you on it though. Good luck!

You obviously don't know the power of the Catholic church.  Sure, they won't "grill" you but as I stated earlier they have a database of Catholic baptisms and Holy Communions and Confirmations and simply have to search your name.  Also, you will have to tell them which parrish you were baptised in and they will contact them. 

Not to mention the fact that lying just to be a child's godparent completely negates the purpose of being the child's spiritual guide.  Way to go! 

rease.

I would give you advice on this, but im catholic and wouldnt want to spend eternity burning in hell.

Thanks though!

BananaPancake

kada626:

You should be fine. If they ask say one of you was baptized catholic but you don't attend a church regularly. I don't think they are going to grill you on it though. Good luck!

 

DItto PP - They have a database and godparents are asked to provide baptismal certs, dates, and sometimes proof of other sacraments. They will also contact the parish you're registered in to make sure you're a member in good standing.

I just can't see how someone could be ok standing in front of an entire parish and lying in such a way. Ick.

dmogmo

kada626:

You should be fine. If they ask say one of you was baptized catholic but you don't attend a church regularly. I don't think they?are going to grill you on it though. Good luck!

?

LOL?

zlam812

I work for the church...While they won't "grill" you at the class, you still won't be able to pull it off.  Like pp said, one godparent is required to be Catholic and is required to have their pastor send a letter on their behalf to the parish the child is recieving the sacrament saying that you are a registered, active parishioner.  Hope that makes sense. 

dmogmo

BananaPancake:

I just can't see how someone could be ok standing in front of an entire parish and lying in such a way. Ick.

?

I totally agree.?

KatXav

I recently went through this process for my niece and I had to get our confirmation certificates from the parish which I was confirmed (had to have a seal, copies not accepted) and the same with regards to my marriage certificate.

Your friends are probably only thinking of who would take care of their child should something happen rather then finding mentors to guide their child through their spiritual faith (usually this can be the same people except in your case).

 I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to turn down your friends offer and I appreciate the respect you have for the Catholic faith by not trying to "pose"

nikinoodles

I'm a catholic. Not a strict one, but there are people in my family who are. How can you promise to raise the said child in a catholic upbringing, by the way of the church....if you're not catholic? You should be honest to the church, and see what you need to do to be named as a godparent (if you still can). I dont think "posing" as one is right, or fair. Plus, depending on the church...they would probably want to see record of it anyway. IMO, Its just a pretty disrespectful thought all around.

velvetflip

This is so utterly ridiculous....just say no and tell her to find someone who is Catholic. ?Not that I am the most religious person, but I hold certain things sacred, and it is totally wrong to lie about this! ?

me&mymonkey

If your friends really want you and your DH to be godparents they may have to pick just one of you depending on the church they attend.  I know at my church only one of the godparents have to be Catholic (and yes they check your baptism/confirmation records).  So if they pick one of you and then someone who is actually Catholic then it might not be a problem.  Again depends on the rules in their area.

desmerelda317

If your friends and you are really set on having you and your husband as the God parents then you could convert and go through the baptism, communion, etc. but I wouldn't do it unless it was something you wanted to do for your own life not just to be somebody's godparents.  I agree with the pps in that this is a really awful thing to lie about.  It isn't just a little white lie, you're lying to an entire congregation, not just a priest and you'd definitely be caught in the lie anyway and that's no way to start out being a child's spirtual guide in life.

SCMcMahon

I'm usually a lurker on this board, but thought I would add what little information I have.  I work for a catholic diocese as well.  My best friend asked me to be her child's godmother.  At the time I was single and the church asked where I had received ALL of my sacraments (baptism, first communion, reconcilliation - that was it at the time).  Well my friend waited too long for the baptism, and I had married a non-catholic, in a non-catholic ceremony.  Once the church found out that I had not been married in the church, they said I was no longer eligible to be a godparent.

This may not be the policy for all diocese/churches but I thought I would mention it.

soontobemrsthoreson

from my understanding you would have to prove via baptism or confirmation certificate that you are Catholic. Also, i think the teacher of the course and the priest will notice when you confused with all the standing, sitting, kneeling at Mass during the baptism. I don't thnk its going to be possible for both of you to do it. Plus being a godparent means you are going to raise that child Catholic so really one ofyou should be Catholic. How else will you teach them Catholic doctrine and beliefs?

cranberry27

If your friends want you to be the guardian for their child should something happen to them, that goes in their will. ?You can still do that, and nothing that says that the godparents are also the default guardians. ?Mention that - it may be that they want you as guardians and are trying to ensure it though making you the godparents.

As a lapsed, cynical Catholic, I still think the faking it idea is rough moral ground, and the other posters are right. You would never get away with it. ?I wouldn't blame the parish if they refused to do any baptism at all if the parents got caught trying to pass off non-Catholics on their first try.