Question re: visitors

ArcticFox

DH is OOT and my friend is coming over with her boyfriend tonight.  My 4.5 year old goes to bed around 8, and I don't want to keep her up too much past that because it has been a LONG week and we might go to Breakfast w Santa as soon as we wake up in the morning.

My 2 year old goes to bed around 9:30.. she also needs a bath because she already had 2 poopy diapers and has sticky stuff in her hair..

So my friend txts me that she's going to get here prob 6:30 or 7 (meaning prob 7).

Should I encourage her to leave at a certain time?  My DD gets SO worked up, and if people are here, she won't stay in her room for bed.. plus I have to get my other DD bathed and in bed by 9:30..

I am so stressed out because I have been so busy and the kids are exhausted.. I feel like maybe it isn't a good idea for her to get here like 45 minutes before I usually start putting my DD down for bed.  I can't have her rough-housing with guests and then 2 minutes later have her in bed, she needs time to relax/calm down.

Telyco

Can you just have them come over after she is in bed?

Two*True

Or maybe included friend and bf in the nighttime routine?  Instead of rough housing maybe they could read books.  So maybe they can read to DD#1 while you bathe DD#2.  I'm assuming that part of visiting you is also visiting with your family.

wendyj

Is your friend coming over to keep you company/help you out because DH is out of town or is she just coming because she feels like it? Would your friend be willing to help during bathtime/bedtime? Maybe she could strike a deal with DD that if she gets ready for bed quickly without a fuss, she'll read DD a story, come up to say goodnight, or something like that. If DD puts up a fuss, set some limits with her and don't give in.

If it stresses you out too much to have your friend there, either don't have her over, or don't have her come by until your DDs are in bed.

festivus

If nothing else, you may just want to give your friend a heads up about the timing of everything. That will give her an opportunity to offer to help, suggest maybe another day might be better, etc. Tell her your concerns, and, if she's a good friend, she'll help find a reasonable resolution.

mrsoc

When I have friends (without kids) over in the evening, I either tell them to come after the boys are in bed (which is usually never later than 7:30, which is easier than 9:30) or I just say that they will have to bear with me through the nighttime routine (which takes about 20-30 minutes).