Questions to ask Divorce Lawyer?

LoveyFNR

So my mom knows a slew of good lawyers as she was a single mom and is also a business owner and I'm going to figure out which one I think will do the best job for me. Never had to do this before so I'm at a loss as to what to ask him/her. What are some good questions to ask them first and foremost? What should I look for?

My background: H is in jail awaiting sentencing for felony domestic abuse and terroristic threats (they can serve him papers in jail right?), we have a one year old and another on the way due in June. We have been married 9 months only. He has a ton of debt and I have none. He has a huge background of trouble and violent behavior that dates back to him as a YOUNG child, I have a couple minor things when I was young, nothing serious. I have had a steady successful job for 5 years (good for a 25 year old I think) and he can't hold a job longer than 3 months. You can see where I am going with this.

I don't want to "take" his kids from him but am hoping for full custody with some sort of visitation which we can discuss after he is released. Considering his background I don't think this should be too difficult.

So where do I start? I want someone I know will fight for me and won't play games.

DaringMiss

Chances are the attorney will ask YOU a ton of questions.

Make sure you have *all* of the paperwork from your H's arrest and conviction.  Obviously, your H is likely to do jail time for such charges.  Was the domestic abuse towards you?  Were your children (born or unborn) injured or threatened in any way?   Is there a Protection Order in place for you and the kids?   Did drugs or alcohol play a role in the events that led to his arrest?  

Eventually you will want to get a copy of the full arrest file with pictures and any audio/video recording that the police might have made (interrogation, 911 tapes) so that you have all of the proof you need to show how violent/dangerous he is.  Any medical records generated as a result of the event?

Chances are, with such a violent felony conviction, your husband will get at best supervised visitation and he will likely have to pay for the supervisor.   The courts will attempt to help your H maintain his relationship with the children unless he was directly abusive to them.  If you were the one threatened or abused, you can ask that the pick up and drop offs be done in a police station so that you guys never have to see one another.  If there is a substance abuse problems, you might be able to require random drug testing when he is released.

Ask your lawyer how you can protect yourself and the kids as much as possible. 

LoveyFNR

To answer you, yes the abuse was towards me while pregnant. He threatened to kill both my son and I as well so I do view him as a danger to both of us. He has a severe drinking problem which causes his violence issues. He has not yet been charged so how do I get copies of these records? Considering I am the victim I should be able to acquire them easier right? I will contact the district attorney and see if he can't get that information to me tomorrow.

There was no need for medical attention following the incident but they did take pictures as I had a visibly swollen face and chunks of hair ripped out.

The courts automatically put an order of protection over both myself and my son so that part is covered. I will acquire copies of the report and then contact an attorney.

I am glad to hear there is a strong possibility for supervised visitation. I was extremely worried about that as I fear for my child's safety. My STBXH has a long long history of violent behaviors and has drank around my child before. Because of his priors he is already supposed to do alcohol and anger counseling and have random UAs and breathalizers. After 2 years he still never completed the counseling and has only received one drug test. Hopefully that will change once he is sentenced.

Should I wait for his sentencing to be completed (which could be anytime within the next 3 months) before filing so that his new charges can factor in or will the report be sufficient?

Thank you so much for your answer.

DaringMiss

I can't answer your question about timing of divorce filings -- that is a question that only your lawyer can answer.  A great deal of this depends on the laws of your state and the predilections of the local judges.  

But given your H's violent and addicted history, I can't imagine that visitation would be allowed without HUGE hurdles put in place.  Supervised visitation would be necessary at a minimum and if your husband is required to pay for the supervisor, I can't imagine that he will be able to exercise the option frequently.  Plus, if addiction continues, it is unlikely that he will be able to hold his life together well enough to make it happen.

cautionwillburneyes

I have something similar with my XH.  He was convicted of a felony because of his behavior towards me and sentenced to 7 years in prison.  He served 2 years and has been released, but is out of state.  He also has some mental health issues.  I have a 5 year restraining order and it includes the kids so he has had no phone, in person contact or visitation for going on 4 years now.  I did stipulate that he could write to the children and send it to my attorney's office (who is also my aunt).  He has only done so 3 times though.

I guess I'm just saying that if he's a danger to you, it's possible that he won't be granted visitation at all.