So here's the dilemma....

JWiety030411

I am planning on becoming a SAHM once our baby is born.  It will be our first, and the money I currently make is sort of just our "spending" money - my husband makes enough to support our family.  I'd basically use all of my salary to pay for child care, so it's not really worth it to me.  ANYWAY - I don't know when to announce this to work.  If I tell them BEFORE I leave to have the baby, then my salary and benefits would end at the end of the month that I quit work (my due date is July 2, so they'd probably end in June).  I could potentially have a lapse of time where I'm off my current insurance and not quite on my husband's plan yet.  If I tell them AFTER I leave, and after the baby is born, I'd get paid maternity time and my benefits would continue seamlessly without me having to go on my husband's plan.  I'd then have to tell them as my maternity time was ending that I wasn't coming back.  However, I work at a church and I would feel bad to mislead them into thinking I plan on coming back when I don't, just to have paid maternity time.

Any thoughts?  I know I should probably just do what's best for our family (which would be holding out my benefits and pay as long as I can) but I just feel like I'm being dishonest.

bride2bee2008

Personally I couldn't do that, I would feel too guilty taking money from a Church and leading them on.

Are you positive you can't get on DH's insurance?  I had a similar problem and just had a few weeks overlap to ensure I was covered.  Alternatively, could you talk to work and mention that you are doubtful that you'll return but instead of taking the maternity leave you were hoping to just keep the insurance until you are on your DH's plan.  I would think they would be understanding about that since you were being honest with them! 

bookworm982

I told my principal today that I'm planning on leaving, but nothing is official until I submit a written letter of resignation. My pregnant sister is doing the same thing in her job as a social worker.

Could you do something similar? That would mean that you could have the benefits, but your employer would know to start looking for someone to replace you. In most jobs it is possible to have the best of both worlds.

dogsfornow

Legally they have the right to ask for all the benefits and salary BACK from you if you don't come back from leave.  I think it would be highly unethical to know you weren't returning and act like you were.

Most group plans have automatic sign up due to life changes (i.e. job loss or birth of a child.)  I would ask more questions about your husband's insurance. 

WiFeY 4 LiFeY

Well I know this might be the wrong thing to do but I told my work I wasnt sure, so I would get paid leave. Then after that was over (6 wks) I extended it to the 3month leave, and about a month before my time to come back I told them I wasnt returning.

I didnt feel to bad at the time bc it was Macy's and the turn over is so high

MrsCAA

We could switch to DH's insurance on my "quit day." So there was no- not coverage. But he had to get it all set up about a month prior for a smooth transition.

I quit at 24 wks, but we also moved states. Personally I would quit before hand, just b/c i would feel bad quiting during materity leave.

bride2bee2008

WiFeY 4 LiFeY:

Well I know this might be the wrong thing to do but I told my work I wasnt sure, so I would get paid leave. Then after that was over (6 wks) I extended it to the 3month leave, and about a month before my time to come back I told them I wasnt returning.

I didnt feel to bad at the time bc it was Macy's and the turn over is so high

Wow!  I feel like this is the reason companies hesitate to take on pregnant women or look for ways to "get rid of them" during the middle of their pregnancies. 

AlfiesMOM

I think it also depends on when you leave vs. when you get paid. I know my husband recently just left his job and was off two weeks before he started another. I was concerned because we were out of the country but HR told him because he was leaving two weeks into the month he would have benefits till the end of the month because they were already paid for. I would check into when your benefits would actually stop. You also should havethe option of cobra for at least a few weeks till you could get on your husbands.

erichesin

I feel if they offer paid maternity leave then you should not feel bad. It's like when you have paid vacation, if you quit they pay you for the days you didn't already take off. The maternity leave is something you are given after working there a certain period so why feel bad if it is a benefit they give you? I know it would feel kind of bad, but they have to go into a situation of whether giving paid maternity leave or not thinking that a lot of women might wanna stay at home afterwards and quit!

arobertson62282

That's tricky - prior to TTC, I talked with our benefits person who was pregnant at the time to talk through my options. I didn't have maternity benefits on my company's plan so my husband was going to create a new plan for us since he's a consultant. As a result, I dropped my insurance at work all together.

Is there someone you can talk to at work about your options? Maybe wait til you're further along? I don't know....your husband may also want to talk to his insurance provider about when you can cross over to his plan.

vjmc21

If you were planning to switch to the insurance provided by your DH's employer, quitting your job would be considered a "qualifying event" and you should be able to enroll under his insurance once your current insurance ends.  As long as you enroll within 30 days of the event, his insurance will begin after your policy expires (meaning there will be no lapse in coverage as your new insurance will back date to the day following your old policy expiring - as long as you enroll within the 30 days).  Make sure your DH checks with his HR dept to be sure that what I've told you is accurate, but it shouldn't be a problem to have one insurance policy end June 30 and another start July 1.  However, if you do end up having your baby in July, you will have to meet your deductable again with the new insurance.  HTH!

mel101

Since you work at a church you probably believe in God, I don't have to risk offending you or being too preachy lol God will bless your honesty if you decide to be up front about your plans.

toridear

One other thought - this time of year is typically "open enrollment" - are you sure you can't get on your husband's plan now?

MrsMommyD

I was gonna say to just do what's best for you and "pretend" that you're unsure.  But that was until I read you work for a church LOL  I don't think I could do it.  I would feel very bad and I think it's just too risky to mess around with a church!  And I'm not even a very religious person!

faith_urz4eva

I worked for the a company for 4 years before I became pregnant. All of my bosses had an "idea" that I would most likely be staying home after my maternatly leave, but they are not legally allowed to ask that question. I took my 12 weeks paid leave, and put in my 2 weeks notice. My bosses were very understanding, and I don't feel at all that I did the company wrong. I paid into my short term disability everymonth, and that is exactly what I got back. It is just part of life, and business. I guess it may depend on who you work for, but I worked for a corporation. They did not lose money over this. If you are paying into short term disability, then you should get your maternanty leave. I understand you work for a church, but it is still a place of business. It should not affect your decision making process. IMO

allisonmarie22

Is your husband's company doing an open enrollment sometime around the end of the year? Most companies do it either around mid-year or the end of the year.

If so then I would go ahead and get on your husband's insurance during open enrollment so there is no question as to whether or not you can be added to his policy.

As far as your job goes, I would tell them before you go on maternity leave. I would feel guilty taking pay and benefits from a job I don't plan to go back to.

tyla1111

Yeah, I couldn't do that.  I would have to tell.  If one of my employees did that I would lose a lot of respect for her.

wh288205

It isn't dishonest if you wait to use the benefits because you have worked hard to earn those benefits. You deserve to be able to use them.

dreambig527

Why don't you switch to your husbands insurance now- if you know you'll be there anyway, I would switch ASAP.   My sister did the same thing - and her husband's insurance tried to not cover the delivery because it was a "preexisting condition"- which was crap. Of course, my sister fought it and won- the ins. company paid- but not something you want to deal with. Personally, I'd wait until the start of your 3rd tri. or end of your 2nd - and then let work know.  Then they'll have plenty of time to hire someone new and get them trained before you leave.