purchasing gifts as a sahm..

happybride14

this might be a silly question but with the holidays here and gift shopping on my to-do list, i was wondering how you work out purchasing gifts for dh.  being a newly sahm, this got me thinking....does dh give you money on a regular basis that you save away for birthdays, christmas or do you just put it on the family credit card? i need to get used to the fact that i'm buying his gifts with his money.  

tia! 

memali26

We don't view it as his money. Yes, he goes to the job that earns it, but we are a team, so it is our money. DH doesn't give me an allowance for anything. We have joint checking and savings accounts, and money to cover all expenses, including gifts, come from those accounts.

ktsnshn

All money is our money. Because DH pays the credit card bill and sees the charges, I will either pay cash for gifts or have my mom charge them and pay her back if I want to surprise him.

passar3588

We have a joint account for all household and kid expenses and then we each have a personal checking/savings account for ourselves. I guess you could call it "fun money." We each get the same amount each year in one lump sum. I buy my DH's Christmas gift from that.

Turkey Lurkey

We don't buy for each other anymore. When we did, I'd just put it on the cc so he didn't see where I shopped and he'd usually use cash since I do the bills. Oh and it's our money.

angelakh

We don't normally buy Christmas gifts for each other.  We buy what we want when we want it as long as it's reasonable.  We are very much on the same page financially, so we would never go out and buy anything too extreme.  DH is not a surprise me with a gift kind of guy and he is not the best gift picker outer, so our system works out well.

happybride14

i know i should look at it as "our" money and not "his."  this is all new to me and i'm sure i will eventually get there..lol.  

NKR717

Same as other PPs Except I do work Part-Time, But the money both of us earn is OUR Money. We don't have CCs, so I just pay with Debit, or take out the cash. Either way he doesn't really see what I am buying him. If I really wanted something to be a huge suprise and make absolute sure he didn't have any way of finding out about it I would just take out the cash.

chicsub

If I really think about it, I admit I see it as his money, but 99% of the time I don't.  I can see where that can be an adjustment mentally. 

We have credit cards, but I can't remember the last time we've used one, so we just use our debit card.  I buy a lot on Amazon, so it doesn't give away the gift.  However, we're not big on gift giving anyways and like to do a nice dinner out instead.  I'm sure that costs us more than just buying straight gifts, but it's nice to splurge and spend time together.

happybride14

also, we have a joint account that i have access to but it is for grocery shopping and runs to target for household necessities.  we do have another account but i don't have access to that yet (credit card)...maybe i should discuss this with him later tonight.  

thanks for the advice ladies  

MrsBalletStar05

He knows I spend a lot of money on black Friday and at certain stores on a regular basis.... Sometimes I can buy his gifts in conjunction with those times and he doesn't realize that I bought him something :-) because we only have one checking account and no credit cards.

morgs8384

This question has popped up a few times lately.. perhaps a new one to drink to!

But in all seriousness, we have always had a joint bank account, so even before I was a SAHM he could "see" what I was buying if he ever wanted to. And we have always looked at it as "our" money since being married. We are a team.

angelakh

happybride14:

i know i should look at it as "our" money and not "his."  this is all new to me and i'm sure i will eventually get there..lol.  

 

It took me quite a while to get used to that as well.  I was 30 when we got married and had been working full time since I was 18, so it was hard to go from making money to sharing DH's.  I knew it was "our" money, but emotionally I had a hard time giving up my financial independence.  Now, I hardly think about it at all.  It took about a year of sharing accounts for me to get there. 

LynsiBHM

We view the money he makes at work as "ours" but we do have allownaces.  We started this when I was still working to stay on budget.  We each get a small amount of cash each week to spend on whatever- coffee, lunches, manicures, etc.  Basically anything that isn't a necessity or doesn't fall into any other category of our joint budget.  This money has been drastically cut since we're on one income now, but I suppose I could save it and use ot for gifts.

For now, we have a rewards credit card that we use on just about everything and pay each month in full. We also each have an "emergency" credit card that we keep for "just incase" and eachothers' gifts. We set a limit before the holidays and then pay if off ASAP. By the time he sees the bill, he'll already have the gifts, so it works for us.

MainelyFoolish

I buy all the Christmas gifts from our joint account. I even buy my own presents, because I was sick of getting dumb stuff from DH (he tries, but he's a terrible shopper).

WiFeY 4 LiFeY

memali26:

We don't view it as his money. Yes, he goes to the job that earns it, but we are a team, so it is our money. DH doesn't give me an allowance for anything. We have joint checking and savings accounts, and money to cover all expenses, including gifts, come from those accounts.

This is how we do it too, for gifts I'll pull cash out so he cant see it on our online banking

MaxandRuby

I have a separate checking account that he puts money in from his check. That account is for buying him gifts and for buying me fun stuff every now and again like the boots I just bought myself. We also use that account as a back up checking account too.

April37

memali26:

We don't view it as his money. Yes, he goes to the job that earns it, but we are a team, so it is our money. DH doesn't give me an allowance for anything. We have joint checking and savings accounts, and money to cover all expenses, including gifts, come from those accounts.

This.  I do have my own credit card (in addition to our joint credit card) so if I need to buy him a gift, I put it on there.  That bill is still paid out of our joint checking account but all he sees is the credit card name... he does not have access to my itemized credit card bill.

JenWhite123

We pay for Christmas with cash.  Every week I take an extra $10-20 out of the ATM and stash away in a jar at home. I also put Craigslist sales money in the jar.  I use that money to buy all of our Christmas gifts.

happybride14

!

angelakh:

happybride14:

i know i should look at it as "our" money and not "his."  this is all new to me and i'm sure i will eventually get there..lol.  

 

It took me quite a while to get used to that as well.  I was 30 when we got married and had been working full time since I was 18, so it was hard to go from making money to sharing DH's.  I knew it was "our" money, but emotionally I had a hard time giving up my financial independence.  Now, I hardly think about it at all.  It took about a year of sharing accounts for me to get there. 

l

 

this is me exactly!!  it's quite an adjustment but worth it for sure

happybride14

morgs8384:

This question has popped up a few times lately.. perhaps a new one to drink to!

But in all seriousness, we have always had a joint bank account, so even before I was a SAHM he could "see" what I was buying if he ever wanted to. And we have always looked at it as "our" money since being married. We are a team.

i'm sorry!!  drink up!  Lol.  

dsmithplus2

We are both bringing in money, yes he brings in the majority, but we don't view our money as separate. It is each others. I just started watching a few kids this year (for school teachers in my family), so I am paid each Friday. Before I did this, I would usually tell my H I needed to do Christmas shopping. He's not really into picking anything out or helping me unless it's his parents' gift. Usually, he just gives me a credit card, but if I ask him for money around this time, he knows. 

I never let him know its for his gifts though! 

notkateanymore

ktsnshn:

All money is our money. Because DH pays the credit card bill and sees the charges, I will either pay cash for gifts or have my mom charge them and pay her back if I want to surprise him.

This is exactly us.  

wifeandmama

It's our money, plain and simple.  Not his money.  I just buy the presents.