How old is too old for a pacifier?

sarahns80

We tried ditching the paci at 2.5 years but found it was taking close to an hour for her to go to sleep. She just uses it for sleep. I was sick of messing with it and having #2 just makes me want to go easy on everything. When do you think they should get rid of it by?

SeasideBride06

My personal opinion is age 2.  I can't stand to see a kid take one out of their mouth to talk or eat, then put it back in. With DD1 we went to bedtime/naps only a little after her first birthday and then completely away a month before her second birthday. 

About a month before getting rid of them altogether, we started reading books about getting rid of the paci with her.  The day we decided to do it, we had her help us gather them from all over the house and then she put them in the trash can.  She honestly asked for them one time after that and a simple reminder that she threw them away was good enough. 

la79al

Our pediatric dentist told us that it wouldn't affect her teeth permanently until age 5.  DD1 had hers 24/7 until a month before she turned 3.  She started chewing on them and had a huge hole in one.  DH cut the end off and gave it back.  DD was devastated, tried to suck on it and cried and cried.  She threw it away herself but was inconsolable for an hour.  She still remembers that 'daddy cut her bubby apart'.  Then a few months later she went through a phase where she would take one of DD2s and disappear.  And the pretty serious overbite that she had has long corrected itself.

mistresscox

Kindergarden?  High School?  j/k!

I personally think we put too much pressure on ourselves for silly things.  What is more important-sleep or her not having a paci?  I think it varies from household to household and there's no one answer.  Is it a real paci?  Like one that can affect her teeth?  (Even at that I'm not sure I'd be too worried.  My dentist admitted to me that his kids used theirs until they were 4 and their teeth are fine.)  

If it helps at all here is how we got rid of it for DD (just this October).  We had planned a trip where she was going to stay with my parents for the weekend (first time away from mommy and daddy!).  About a week or week and a half before we went we started talking to her about how we were going to leave "this" (that's what she called it) at Papa's house.  She knew at that point that it was for babies so we told her about Papa's baby kitties and how they didn't have a "this" and were very sad without it and that she would need to give it to them.  I figured this way my parents would have it to soothe her and then we would just go cold turkey.  

The day that we left we reminded her that she needed to leave "this" with the kitties.  She fussed a bit but then we found a cat, dangled it in front of her and she reached out and grabbed it with her little paw and put it right in her mouth (to chew it, but DD didn't know any better).  I made a bit of a deal out of how happy it made the kitty, we said bye bye and that was it.  Then we drove home for 10 hours and surprisingly she only asked for it twice the whole trip.  I reminded her that we gave it to the kitty and that seemed to be enough for her.  She asked a few times that following week and cried maybe 3 or 4 times but it was surprisingly uneventful.  I think because we talked about it so much before hand it really helped.  There was no surprise, she got to be a part of it, etc.  I'm sure it won't work for every kid, but it sure did for mine!  GL!   

Smores730

We didn't linger with the paci or bottles and not long after 1, everything was gone. My thought process was I'd rather suffer a few days of a grumpy baby then days/weeks of whining toddlers.

SimarikSmokin

My dd takes it at only naps and bedtime! She just turned 2 3 weeks ago so i am on a mission to get rid of it. but here is my point where evryone agrees if she is only taking at nap and bedtime whats the harm in that? she spits it right out soon as she is sound asleep. 

sharrow

I think a paci is fine till 3 or 4, if it is only used during bedtime.

Personally, I don't think they should have it during the day past 18 mo.- 2 years.  It can affect speech, not just teeth alignment.

AmandaP678

I HATE them, my DS is soo attached to his. We've tried everything and he won't give them up!

scaneiki

The paci should be gone around one to one and a half.  Its a lot easier to break the habit when they're younger.

LLB430

I was hoping by she was 3 we would get rid of it.  She has only used it for naps and bedtime since age 2.  At this point I am waaayyy behind because my kid isn't potty trained completely, sleeps in a crib and still has her paci.  I want her to have her paci through a transition to her big girl room/bed and haven't made plans for that yet...mostly because it is taking so long to ttc#2 and I don't want to move her until I know we have to.  

However, she only slept 15 mins total until she was age two so at this point since she sleeps awesome and is a happy little girl I really don't feel any pressure to change things up right now.

WifeofaMarine

mistresscox:

Kindergarden?  High School?  j/k!

I personally think we put too much pressure on ourselves for silly things.  What is more important-sleep or her not having a paci?  I think it varies from household to household and there's no one answer.  Is it a real paci?  Like one that can affect her teeth?  (Even at that I'm not sure I'd be too worried.  My dentist admitted to me that his kids used theirs until they were 4 and their teeth are fine.)  

If it helps at all here is how we got rid of it for DD (just this October).  We had planned a trip where she was going to stay with my parents for the weekend (first time away from mommy and daddy!).  About a week or week and a half before we went we started talking to her about how we were going to leave "this" (that's what she called it) at Papa's house.  She knew at that point that it was for babies so we told her about Papa's baby kitties and how they didn't have a "this" and were very sad without it and that she would need to give it to them.  I figured this way my parents would have it to soothe her and then we would just go cold turkey.  

The day that we left we reminded her that she needed to leave "this" with the kitties.  She fussed a bit but then we found a cat, dangled it in front of her and she reached out and grabbed it with her little paw and put it right in her mouth (to chew it, but DD didn't know any better).  I made a bit of a deal out of how happy it made the kitty, we said bye bye and that was it.  Then we drove home for 10 hours and surprisingly she only asked for it twice the whole trip.  I reminded her that we gave it to the kitty and that seemed to be enough for her.  She asked a few times that following week and cried maybe 3 or 4 times but it was surprisingly uneventful.  I think because we talked about it so much before hand it really helped.  There was no surprise, she got to be a part of it, etc.  I'm sure it won't work for every kid, but it sure did for mine!  GL!   

I agree with this. I've always kind of let DS do things at his own pace, not when people say he should give it up - such as the bottle and BFing. He never took to a pacifier, but he was obsessed with the bottle. He was drinking out of a bottle until he was 2.5. We tried to take it away before then, and it was a complete fail. We tried every sippy cup imaginable and he refused to drink out of it.

At 2.5, we didn't really even have to "take it away." We were boating at my parents lake house and we lost the bottle (not on purpose). We tried to find it (DS was around for the whole thing so he knew it was really lost) to no avail. I had only brought one bottle and a trainer cup. So, DS spent the rest of the weekend drinking out of the trainer cup (we did find the bottle two days later, but we just threw it away and DS never knew we found it), and then a few weeks drinking out of the trainer cup we were able to transition him to a sippy cup.

I also BF DS until he was 18 months old and so many people IRL were so judgy about it and that he was too old for it. But, like the bottle, he was obsessed with the boob. It was a much smoother process since he self-weaned instead of me choosing when he had to be done.

None of this was related specifically to the paci, but just saying that I was pretty lax about stuff and not "you have to give this up by X age." DH and I had decided if he hadn't given up the bottle by 3, we'd take it away cold turkey, but it happened pretty seamlessly at 2.5. 

Good luck mama! Trying to get rid of things they are so attached to is hard! 

JCM

DD never had a paci & I'm so happy we went that route!  One of my cousins let his little girl have one too long & it totally messed up her teeth.  She had it 24/7.  I also like seeing kids faces not this huge paci stuck in their mouths.  I think the AAP says no longer than 1.  

segerama

Our pediatrician recommended to be done with the paci by age 3.  All this fall, we talked to our daughter (2.5 years) about giving her paci to Santa, so that she could get some big girl toys.  Last week, we saw Santa at a Holiday lighting.  On her own, she said, "Mommy, can I give Santa my pacis?"  We waited in line, she handed him her pacis, and got a candy cane.  Later that night, I brought out one of the Christmas presents I had already bought and told her it was from Santa for giving him her pacis.  She has talked about them, but has not asked to have them back.  I think it worked because it was her idea.

 

CMDR513

smeame14:

Honestly, I can't stand seeing kids with a paci once they are able to start talking....Sorry, but just take the thing away, throw it away and don't give it back.  Sorry it sounds harsh, but a three year old doesn't need to suck on a paci.  We weaned our DD off at 15 months, and it wasn't that hard.  Sometimes I feel that parents just have to put their foot down and say enough is enough.  Two is the absolute oldest to have one.

Agree with the 1st line. Thank goodness DS didn't care for his. He stopped using them before he turned 8 weeks.

mrsjenniferg2010

My pedi told us by 3 we should have it taken. By then it can start messing up there teeth. He only gets it for naps right now. I plan on starting to take it away from.naps in the next 3 months. We just had a new baby and I don't want anymore changes for him right now.

SuperCuteBenz

smeame14:

Honestly, I can't stand seeing kids with a paci once they are able to start talking....Sorry, but just take the thing away, throw it away and don't give it back.  Sorry it sounds harsh, but a three year old doesn't need to suck on a paci.  We weaned our DD off at 15 months, and it wasn't that hard.  Sometimes I feel that parents just have to put their foot down and say enough is enough.  Two is the absolute oldest to have one.

I think this is a crazy thing to say when its not your child. My DD loved her "sassy" and we tried many times to get rid of it. No, a 3 year old doesn't "need" it, but it is a comfort item like many other things can be. 

To the OP: Here is our story...

My DD finally gave hers up in June of this year. She was almost 3 1/2. She didn't even take a paci until she was 1 and found it in her crib. We thought it would be nothing, but she was seriously addicted. We only let her use it at bedtime, naps and in the car from 2 on.

We tried many, many times to get her to give it up. Each time she started sucking on her fingers. She made it 2 months once before she started sucking them. It really stunk. We were trying so hard and pressuring her. At 2.5 our pedi said to leave it be, and she would likely give it up by 3. Well that came and went. My DD was a good sleeper without it, but that was because she would use her fingers to comfort her. Same thing at naps.

Maybe give it a couple more days, but honestly I wish we wouldn't have been so hard on DD. It was very comforting to her, and it really wasn't hurting anything in the long run. I also think it actually helped her with the birth of my DS. She had a really hard time dealing with me being in the hospital, and I imagine it would have been much harder had she not had her "sass" and blankie. I plan on letting DS wean himself. He is an amazing sleeper and I am not messing with that.

 

KathrynMD

I think 2 is about the max age unless there's some extenuating circumstance.  Whenever you alter your kid's habits its going to be tough, but the sooner the better IMO.

We were done w/ bottles at about 14 months and binkies at 22 months.  I tried at 16 months and just didn't have it in me to do it, but she got more and more addicted to it and DH and I used it as a crutch - so I made it my goal to be totally done by her 2nd birthday.

khagan9368

IMHO - opinion, if they are old enough to ASK for it with words - they shouldn't have them.  Kayla never really got into the whole paci thing though, we'll see what this baby does.  If he/she is a paci baby I will plan to take it away around a year - same time as the bottle.  Being a second time mom however - I admit that ANYTHING can change, lmao

Mrs.V

DS1 stopped at about 2.5 years. He used it for sleep only but he seemed to old for it. I thought it'd be awful but he gave them up just fine (we told him that he had to give them to his little baby cousin, whom he adores, so I think he felt like he was being really helpful). DS2 never took the paci and I'm glad because the lead up to cutting DS1 off of the paci was stressful for me. But really, if its just for bed and it really makes a difference in your LOs sleep, I'd wait a bit! I hate to mess with sleep!

faith_urz4eva

Have them send their pacifiers to the "garbage man" or mail them off to other "little babies"  Then you just have to deal with the crying/lack of sleep for a few days and thats that. You can't cave once you do this, because then they will know that their pacifiers didn't really go anywhere. You just have to be strong. It is so much better for their teeth/speech not to have it. imo....

kdeames

scaneiki:

The paci should be gone around one to one and a half.  Its a lot easier to break the habit when they're younger.

This. We weaned from the paci by 15 months with both kids. I was surprised that they were so easy goig about it considering they were so nuts for it before we weaned.

Pier1girl

It also makes me cringe when I see a kid over 2 walking around with a paci in public.  

Per our pedi's recommendation and our own feelings on the matter, we used it for naptime/bedtime only after age 1 or so.  At around 17 months we took the paci away.  It was rough for a day or two but she got over it quickly.  I'm really glad we did it before she got even more attached to it.  Now that she's 2, I cannot imagine trying to paci-wean her- it would be so much more difficult.  I think she's totally forgotten what one even is because there was a Sesame Street episode about paci-weaning and she didn't even really ask or talk about her paci.