I need advice

ProudMama2DD

Hi all, forgive my AE screen name, I am an active poster on another board but I'm not ready to come out with this news yet.  I think my FI and I are calling off the engagement and going our separate ways, but we have a toddler together.  We have both been very stressed out lately and have all sorts of issues with each other and it doesn't seem to be getting better so tonight he's told me that he thinks it's best to not be together.  I'm definitely sad, but part of me thinks this is for the best.  I know the next few years are going to be very rough, but I think that down the road this will be the best thing for me.

Anyway, I feel terrible for our daughter, I just wanted to give her a "normal" life, which is something I never had (parents divorced when I was 6 months old).  FI is a very good father, so no complaints there, but I have all sorts of questions as far as custody and CS go.  What do I do first? Do I contact a lawyer?  Do we have to goto court or can we establish custody and CS in a mediation type thing? I don't want this to get messy, but I want full custody of her, where FI gets to see her maybe 2 nights a week and every other weekend - is that the normal?  She is almost 18 months old so I'm assuming she will do overnights with him.  If anyone has any insight or advice I'd really appreciate it.  You all are my inspiration! TIA

FyreFlyeRush

Contact your state's Attorney General and/or look on the web. They can get you pointed in the right direction. The best way to set up child support is through the court system. Most states at this point of Payroll Dedcution, keeping all parties honest. In Texas, they will also establish paternity, custody and visitation at that time. Depending on your state, you may have to file for divorce, so look into common law marriage laws, as well.