NBR: How do you and your DH handle gifts/surprises?

austxgrl

DH and I have joint checking and savings accounts.  I pay the bills, check the bank account everyday, set speding budget, etc..  But because I am ocd about checking the account every.single.day he can never surprise me.  Like if he wanted to buy me flowers or a gift or something, I would know right away (probably before he even gave it to me).  So we were trying to figure out how we can do gifts/surprise budgets.  How do you and your DH handle this if you have just joint accounts?  Thanks!

kiarox2002

Well, in the past we each had personal credit cards (that we paid off at the end of each month) so we would charge them.  This year, I gave my friend cash to go buy it at Costco, but I told him that I gave the cash to my mom to order it from Amazon.  

Basically, if I want to surprise him, I pay with cash. 

colleenor

we aren't big into gifts/surprises but if he does get me flowers or the such he just uses his credit card.  i'm like you, i pay all the bill, etc, but i usually only go over the credit card statement 1-2 times a month. 

joyco

Ditto kia on paying with cash.  I do a scrapbook crop once a month and most of the women give me cash, so I squirrel that away and then when it's Jay's birthday, I usually buy him something from my cash stash.  Like last year, he had no idea I'd gone and bought him a cordless drill to replace his broken one b/c he's as much a stickler about the bank account as you, austx.  He checks it multiple times daily.  If I'm ever going to sneak something past him, it has to be well-planned and paid w/ cash.

If I didn't have the cash stash, I'd probably just start debiting stuff at grocery stores, a little at a time.

FireChiefsBride

We also share one bank acct. We have a credit card that we use for randoms like Redbox, tolls, online purchases, etc.

DH does most of the accounting. (Read: I look at the bank acct if forced.)  During the holiday it's a given that I will buy him stuff from HD, some tool stores, etc. He knows where its from, but doesn't really know what it's going to be. If it's from a store I want to hide, I'll snag the cc and pay with that; it'll pop up on the bill in Jan. Because my gifts are going to be from less obvious places, if I was going to see the acct I would prefer he pay with the cc or use cash.   

Except this year we activated that card monitor so now I get emails when purchases over $50 are made on that cc, just bc of the nature of our use.   

OrangeFelt

Ditto the others on the Cash - that's usually method #2.  #1 is we both have our own credit cards that we use and pay off every month (points! yay!), so that's where surprise type stuff if its ordered online goes.

ssinca

I buy so much on amazon that he wouldn't know if it was for him, me, or the baby. 

Emer

I pay with cash when I have it or I charge it to my mom's cc.  Of course, then I have to pay her back, but at least he's already received the surprise before he sees that money come out.

shanwalk2

I am the one that checks our account.

DH typically goes to the ATM and withdraws a large sum of money.  I freak and tell him be shouldn't spend that much on a gift.  Then he randomly will want to start to pay cash when we're at dinner, etc.  I think he just takes a big amount to throw me off, then buys it, and uses the rest of the cash on "regular" purchases.  

I buy stuff for him on the credit card because he never sees it, and I pay it every month.  He'll randomly ask "did you pay the CC".  As long as I say yes, he doesn't require an itemized list of what the costs were. 

amyliisa

FireChiefsBride:

DH does most of the accounting. (Read: I look at the bank acct if forced.)  

Same here!  But we use Amex for everything except the bills that we can't pay with it, or merchants that don't accept it (dry cleaning, my hairdresser, etc) then he sends a big check to Amex every month.  So if I buy him something, he has usually received it before the Amex bill is paid.  I can't think of anytime I've bought him something so far in advance that he would see it on the bill before I gave it to him, but if for some reason that would happen, I'd end up telling him about the surprise before hand.

He, on the other hand, cannot keep a surprise a surprise to save his life.  Even though I'd have virtually no clue because I rarely ever look at the bank acct or Amex bill, he's just too giddy when he tries to surprise me that he ends up giving it to me/telling me about it early.  It's cute.

meg120510

DH handles all of the bills. He also checks the checking account daily. Any gifts I purchase go on the cc. I know when the bill usually comes and plan the purchase so it will show up after he receives it.

JayandJack

DH felt the same way yours did. We ended up getting a seperate checking account and he gets $15 each paycheck going into it. It's not much but it's something. I have my own checking account money put into it per paycheck but mine is higher because I also use it to pay for a lot of other things. I use mine as my safety account in case anything happens to us that I can take care of myself and DS for a few months in an emergency.

I don't like it when he buys me flowers and I'd prefer if he didn't buy me gifts but I'm really weird like that. I'd rather just go shopping for myself. 

thethomps

We have two credit cards.  We usually both use the same one (that earns airline miles and gets paid off every month), but at birthdays and holidays we use the other card so no one is checking and ruining surprises.

Jess.O

DH never looks at the account...ever.  If he's planning on getting something for me he'll either use cash, tell me not to check the bank for however long or use his credit card and then we'll pay it off after I get the gift.