Stressing out!

cadgirl

We finally completed our 17pg questionnaire all about ourselves and sent it to our licensing worker on Friday, and so now we can proceed with the homestudy portion.

Well, I got an email yesterday from her, saying that she would like to stop by our house on Friday and begin the interviews of each of us, and take a look at our house... AHHHH!

I was not expecting this to be so soon after sending in the questionnaire!  So our house is a mess, and we don't have things done that I wanted to have done before she came like putting plastic on windows for insulation - old windows, switching rooms around to make the current sewing room the nursery, buying a lock box for our med, etc...

 If you only had say, 5 hours to get ready for her coming for the first view of your house, what would you focus on?

Dr.Loretta

Relax. I wish I only had 5 hours, or we wouldn't have wasted time cleaning things we didn't need to. I know it will be hard, but they're looking for a house that a child can live in, not a museum showpiece.

If I had 5 hours, I'd make sure the kitchen and bathrooms were clean, basic clutter was removed, and that's about it. We didn't have to have a nursery set up, and you can likely just tell her "here's where the nursery is going to be." What she may end up doing is saying you need to do X, Y, and Z before the end of the homestudy, and she'll swing by again to make sure it's taken care of. NBD, I promise.

GL!

firecracker8

I would think that she would understand that this is short notice. You obviously know all the things that you want to do, just let her know what's on your list. Don't stress!! When our caseworker came to our house it was fun. We got to show her our cute house and she didn't care that it wasn't perfect.

CaptainSerious

Ditto the others.  The homestudy is to make sure your home is a safe environment in which to raise a child and to help prepare you for some of the challenges of adoption.

Are you adopting or fostering/foster-adopt?  I ask because I know that some foster programs have strict requirements about things like escape plans, safety equipment, and storage of medicines and dangerous items, but generally you'll learn about those at the first meeting and have a chance when you get closer to licensing to show that you've meet all the standards.

Relax.  The social worker is coming to help you through the process, not to judge and eliminate you!

cadgirl

Thanks ladies for talking me down from a crazy lady!  We would like foster/adopt, but are also open to just foster.

You know, I've read your advice before, given to others, and thought "yeah, that sounds like good advice."  But then to be suddenly faced with it, it does kinda feel like she will be looking for things to eliminate us... even though I know she won't be.  I guess I kinda feel like we are good enough, and so I expect that she will think that too, even though there's really no reason to.

But tonight when I get home from work late... I will be running through your advice and seeing what I can get done

lafayettegirl

We haven't gotten the visit scheduled, but I did ask our SW what we should be focused on. She said she is going to look for fire extinguishers on every floor, working smoke and carbon monoxide detectors on every floor, and cleared floor space big enough for a pack and play to be erected. Other than that, she wants to see that we aren't hiding Granny in a back room and we aren't cooking meth in the basement. See - NBD!

firefightersgal

I don't want to scare you, but our social worker WAS looking for ways to eliminate us.  However, we weren't able to take sibling groups or older children, so she didn't want us anyway.  I have a bad taste in my mouth about foster/adopt, but I know most social workers are not like ours.

I will say that she was fine on the initial/informal walk-through on our house.  It wasn't until we were nearing licensing that she started getting nasty.

Good luck and I hope you have a MUCH better experience than we did!

cadgirl

firefightersgal:

I don't want to scare you, but our social worker WAS looking for ways to eliminate us.  However, we weren't able to take sibling groups or older children, so she didn't want us anyway.  I have a bad taste in my mouth about foster/adopt, but I know most social workers are not like ours.

I will say that she was fine on the initial/informal walk-through on our house.  It wasn't until we were nearing licensing that she started getting nasty.

Good luck and I hope you have a MUCH better experience than we did!

Wow!  That's crazy!  Well, we had our initial walk through today and she seemed pretty easy going.  Even suggesting things like since we just want little ones (0-3 yrs) that a baby safety lock thing on our cabinet that holds meds is fine instead of a full-fledged lock.  Or saying that even though our basement doesn't have an egress window, that we could still use it for a play room assuming we are down there with the children.  So hopefully it doesn't turn into what you experienced.  But thanks for the heads up!  And I'm sorry it turned out that way for you!

CaptainSerious

Aw, I'm glad it went so well!