He won't sleep

mmkaye

He is breaking my spirit. I am so tired I don't know how much longer I can keep functioning on this little sleep. I am beginning to get scared to drive to work because I can barely stay awake. I don't know what to do for him anymore either. Plus I am getting so short tempered and I feel so guilty when I yell at the baby for little things. (Not screaming yelling or anything just annoyed Malachi's. I am not a horrible mother. LOL)

Last night he fell asleep (in his crib, by himself with no paci) at 7:45 like normal. He was up at 10:30 (back to sleep right away with paci), 12 (screamfest where I ended up feeding him and it was 1:30 before he went back to sleep because he decided he wanted to talk to us), and then again at 3 when I brought him in our bed. I dozed off and on until 4 when he started screaming again. So in other words I got 1 1/2 hour stretch followed by 1 1/2 hour, and then maybe another hour all broken up into little chunks. The same thing happened this entire weekend.

I am so behind at work because I am so tired it takes all my effort just to stay awake. My house is a disaster and I don't even know what to do. I am not against cio, but they say not to do it when they are in growth spurts (which he might be because he has been super hungry), teething (which he definitely is since I can see his two bottom teeth about to push through the gums, etc.

Okay vent over.

FLMommy2B

For a moment I truey thought you were talking about my son. This was my night lastnight and has been for the last couple weeks. Think it's a mixture of growing and teeething.  Regardless I am one zombified Mommy

kerrbear72

Could have written that myself.

Lisa Frank

This is where sleep training, IMO is necessary. Once it starts affecting YOUR health, you HAVE to do something.

I strongly urge you to consider some sleep training. And if you are paci popping 25 times a night, that's a huge problem I'm sorry you're dealing with this, but also remember that you have the power to stop it. 

mmkaye

Lisa Frank:

This is where sleep training, IMO is necessary. Once it starts affecting YOUR health, you HAVE to do something.

I strongly urge you to consider some sleep training. And if you are paci popping 25 times a night, that's a huge problem I'm sorry you're dealing with this, but also remember that you have the power to stop it. 

I have been sleep training.  It just isn't working so well.  I think I need to go to a different method.  I read the Sleeping through the Night book and according to it once they start going down by themselves easily at night, within a few weeks they will start sttn.  That is a bunch of crap.  

I think I am going to get the Ferber book, but don't know if I should start it right now since he has two teeth about to come through.  Ugghhh.

What I don't get is how he can be such a dream to put down for bed.  Literally we do our bedtime routine, I lay him down, he fusses for a max of five minutes or less, and it out.  But such a demon spawn when it comes to night wakenings.  I really thought the paci was the problem, but the last week it doesn't even help him go back to sleep.  And last night the big guns (aka feeding him and laying him back down awake) didn't work.  He never would go back to sleep when usually as soon as I lay him back down he it out.

mmkaye

mullenem:

I'm not really one for drugging but sometimes, some Tylenol or Ibuprophen before bed may help.  The waking up screaming makes me think he's in pain (especially with the teeth coming in).

He laughed in the face of Tylenol.  I thought Advil might work better, but last night it didn't help at all.  Teething tablets occasionally seem to help, but that is about it.

Lisa Frank

mullenem:

I'm not really one for drugging but sometimes, some Tylenol or Ibuprophen before bed may help.  The waking up screaming makes me think he's in pain (especially with the teeth coming in).

I was JUST going to say this.  

If all of your other options aren't working, it's safe to say it's his teeth.  I hope it gets better and that you can get some rest.  Can your DH do the bedtime routine and you go to bed early tonight?

mmkaye

Lisa Frank:

mullenem:

I'm not really one for drugging but sometimes, some Tylenol or Ibuprophen before bed may help.  The waking up screaming makes me think he's in pain (especially with the teeth coming in).

I was JUST going to say this.  

If all of your other options aren't working, it's safe to say it's his teeth.  I hope it gets better and that you can get some rest.  Can your DH do the bedtime routine and you go to bed early tonight?

Actually tonight will be better no matter how possessed Kai acts.  My mom keeps him Tue/Wed and typically stays the night since it is an hour drive one way.  She agreed to take the monitor when she saw the walking zombies this morning.  

I think after this we are going to have to split the nights between dh and I and maybe give him bottles at least once in a while at night so that I can get a little more sleep.  

Tinybride08

I feel your pain sister. Believe me I do. This is DD too!. Only she's not waking up screaming, she's just waking up and it's hard to put her back down without feeding her. I'm supposed to be up around 5 but have been crawling out of bed by 6:15-6:30 and have been late every day. It's a good thing my job is pretty flexible.

I understand about how it affects the mood. I get way more emotional when I'm tired. On top of that, I'm still dealing with painful muscle knots in my shoulders so taking her in and out of the crib is not easy and aggravates it. So I'm tired and hurting and I believe it's taking me longer to heal because I'm not getting that good REM sleep. When you are in deep sleep that's when tissue and muscles really repair. Your body needs sleep to feel good.

Tonight I am going to give her formula with oatmeal and see how long that keeps her full for. I'll try that for a few days and then I'm going to move onto another method.  

CanuckFan03

Hang in there. It can only get better right?  

What are you doing when he wakes after he goes to bed? I haven't read that book, so I"m not sure what the method is?  

Ferber worked for us, so I would recommend checking it out at least.

Is he eating a lot/enough during the day? Could he really be hungry?  

I second the tylenol as well.   

pinkflipflops44

(((()))) Isla had a stretch of only one wake ups and now is back to more.  I blame her inablity to breathe through her nose because as soon as I put her in the swing it works.

Hope you get some rest soon!

aerotigergirl

I know where you're at with this. I wrote this post just over a week ago (I hope that link works!). I got some good feedback, so if you've got time, it's worth reading through. The long and short of it, though, is this: the night I wrote that post, my DS had been up and down every 30-45 minutes from 9ish until midnight, and then I was up with him from midnight until 4AM trying to get him back to sleep. It was the most challenging night with him so far.

Since that post, things have gotten significantly better. I've started more of a bedtime routine with him (still based on his cues rather than on the clock, but I do the same things with him every night in the same order) and it has really helped us. He now goes down in his crib without a fight, and his night wakings are typically very brief and he goes down easily afterward. If he wakes in the night, I go in and pat or rub his back/shush/sing to him until he falls back to sleep. If he seems hungry, I'll nurse. I realize this isn't "sleep training" and he's still depending on my to fall back to sleep, but it is a step in the right direction for us. Rome wasn't built in a day, right? So far, he hasn't cried at all during this process.

This morning, he woke at 4:45, and rather than immediately going to him I decided to wait it out a little to see if he might put himself back to sleep without any assistance from me at all. He didn't cry, he was just babbling and talking to himself. My DH did eventually go in there and pick him up, so I didn't get to see if he would fall back to sleep on his own. I'll try it again tonight, though.

Hang in there, mama. I completely understand how exhausted and frustrated you are. You are not alone.

mmkaye

CanuckFan03:

Hang in there. It can only get better right?  I sure hope so.

What are you doing when he wakes after he goes to bed? I haven't read that book, so I"m not sure what the method is?      Right now I am trying to get him back to sleep without picking him up.  The book basically says that once they have a good bedtime routine (he does and has for quite some time) and are going to bed easily (he is w/o a paci in his crib by himself) within a few weeks they should start sttn.  If not, you have to do something along the lines of CIO which I have tried and failed at because I have to work the next day and can't stay up all night.  He is persistent and has persisted for two hours or more.  I need to try again on the weekend when I don't have to be functional the next day.

Ferber worked for us, so I would recommend checking it out at least.  I am going to get that book this afternoon.

Is he eating a lot/enough during the day?  He typically nurses at 5 AM, gets a bottle at 9 AM (5 oz), 5 oz bottle at 12, lunch around 12:30-1, 5 oz bottle at 2:30-3, nurses as soon as I get home around 4:30ish, nurses around 5:45ish, dinner at 6, and then one more nursing session around 7.  (He is also currently waking up to eat once overnight most commonly around 3:30 AM.)

Could he really be hungry?  I have trouble thinking he is hungrier than one feeding.  I am okay with one feeding a night as long as he sleeps the rest of the time.  LOL  He is small so I figure it is a way to get extra calories into him.  But he is waking up nearly hourly or more.

I second the tylenol as well.