Shower invite didn't include registry

psneed809

The person throwing the shower asked where we were registered to put on the invitation but when my MIL received hers it wasn't on there; what do you do?  It's to late to add it since they have already been sent. 

RoxyLynn

The hostess was absolutely correct to leave it out - gift preferences should never be pushed on people who haven't asked for them.

If anyone wants to know, they'll ask when they RSVP, they'll check with your Mom, or they'll find it online.  If they're not willing to spend that 30 seconds (literally) on it, they didn't want to know.

srs5624

It's not that difficult to find a registry, whether online (amazon) or in-store (target, BRU, etc).

If someone can't manage to find you and they really want to know where you're registered, they'll ask.

They'll likely get you what they want to give you as a gift anyway. Most people get very little from their actual registry. Just a forewarning.

EastCoastBride

I agree that people will figure it out. It's not rocket science.

Christina_Diane

People figure it out by word of mouth; the same as the do for a baby shower as they would a bridal shower. It is tacky and gift-grabby to include the registry info on the shower invites, IMO.

greengirl0909

People will figure it out.  I think its acceptable to include these days, but it's also not that hard to find it.  GL

Charlyne

I find it kind of amusing that people will say it's "gift grabby" to put registry locations on an invite, but then tell people that showers are a gift giving occasion. Isn't the invite, in itself, "gift grabby" then?

I think putting registry info on an invite is fine, as anyone I have ever known wants to know where you're registered when they get a shower invite. If it wasn't included, though, people will likely ask whomever the host was listed as if you're registered somewhere and where at, or look at the most likely stores like BRU, BBB, Target, and Walmart for your name.

Julia_JJ

Christina_Diane:

People figure it out by word of mouth; the same as the do for a baby shower as they would a bridal shower. It is tacky and gift-grabby to include the registry info on the shower invites, IMO.

People will figure it out, yes. But the whole point of a shower is for people to bring gifts - how is the registry info tacky? It's not a wedding invitation.

Liz4444

If someone is close enough to you to be invited to your shower than they are close enough to feel comfortable asking you, your mother, or the host where you are registered. 

cmhicklin

Charlyne:

I find it kind of amusing that people will say it's "gift grabby" to put registry locations on an invite, but then tell people that showers are a gift giving occasion. Isn't the invite, in itself, "gift grabby" then?

I think putting registry info on an invite is fine, as anyone I have ever known wants to know where you're registered when they get a shower invite. If it wasn't included, though, people will likely ask whomever the host was listed as if you're registered somewhere and where at, or look at the most likely stores like BRU, BBB, Target, and Walmart for your name.

rhubarb123

I totally agree with Charlyne.  I find it a PITA when I get an invite with no registry info.  Most RSVP's are through email or if there is a phone number I call and have to leave a message.  I will rarely 'try to find" a registry myself at a store or even on-line.  There are so many variations with the way people are listed it is time consuming and I don't have that much time.  If I see the MTB, grandmother or hostess I can ask...but sometimes that doesn't happen.  My relatives live 3 hours away...not like I see them every month or so. 

IMO it is certainly acceptable to add the registry info on the invite and you are doing the guests a disservice by not adding it.  To the OP, I'm sure your hostess forgot to add it or she was told "mistakenly imo" that it is not proper etiquette.  Not sure how it could have anything to do with etiquette since when the "rules" were established there was no such thing as registries.  lol

Hopefully people are resourceful enough and take the time to look for your registry.  If not you will most likely be returning a lot of duplicates.  Let's hope you get gift receipts.

ryry1977

If I wanted to know I would ask when I RSVPed.  Otherwise your mom and others can spread it by word of mouth.

rhubarb123

RedheadBaker...not too much trouble but certainly too time consuming if I have to play phone tag (specifically when the hostess doesn't respond back!).  I ALWAYS RSVP whether it is via phone or email, so once I've done that I probably wouldn't remember to try calling again to find out where the MTB is registered.  I have to say that almost every invite I get has the registry info on it or little cards included.  I think I have gotten 1 that didn't include the info.  Lucky me.

backinpgh

If the people in your circle tend to purchase from registries, they will find or ask for the information. I know in our circle everyone ignores registries, so including it on our invites didn't help. It all depends on how your friends/family buy for showers.

BitsKD13

RoxyLynn:

The hostess was absolutely correct to leave it out - gift preferences should never be pushed on people who haven't asked for them.

If anyone wants to know, they'll ask when they RSVP, they'll check with your Mom, or they'll find it online.  If they're not willing to spend that 30 seconds (literally) on it, they didn't want to know.

Every shower invite I have ever gotten had the registry info included.  And no one I know feels like the "gift preferences" have been "pushed" them (honestly to that whole sentence I say "WTF?"- IMO).   If guests pay attention to the registry info or not is a totally up to them.

OP: If your guests want to know if you have a registry they will either ask, or do what I've done before getting the invite and check the likely places for a registry (BRU, Target, etc).  

laurakaz13

I'm usually really sensitive to traditional ettiquette, however I don't mind when a registry is on a shower invite. I just don't.   I could find it anyway, but some people are not as internet saavy as others.

Genevieve14

People will figure it out - I wouldn't worry about it.

nmcgoff

I agree in the sense that if the info is not included people can easily find out.  However, I don't think it's tacky to include the info in the invitation but actually convenient and informative.