Anyone else have the urge........

Twinkle5086

To just smack their husband or significant other?

For 9 months we go through morning, noon, and night sickness, round ligament pain, swelling everything, Doctors poking and prodding at us, constant blood tests, up all night to peeing everything 30 minutes. Our backs hurt, our feet hurt, our stomachs hurt and most of the time we suck it up and don't complain its all in the name of having a special little someone to love! Most women work full time on top of it all either being a stay at home mom or working a 40 hour work week and in a lot of cases both of those. We might complain and ask for a little sympathy do we get it most of the time....yea a little but not really...men just don't get it. Oh and did I forget to mention the labor? (FTM here, but from what I hear its not something you'll forget)

 This morning was one of those morning where I had to resist the urge to get up and strangle my dear husband. I have been sick for the last week, not sleeping and having constant BH contractions. Baby boy is also breech so he keeps kicking my in the bladder constantly...not fun. I get up every morning let the dogs out, make my hubby lunch and coffee, get myself ready for work and off I go. I drive an hour to work work all day drive an hour home when theres not traffic. My hubby gets home before I do and do you think he unloads the dishwasher, does a load of laundry, makes dinner? No he heads straight for his computer or a video game. I come home make the dinner clean up the house and when I finally do get to relax I cant even have the TV remote. 

This morning the jerk's alarm clock goes off and he sleeps right through it and I wanted to kill him I was actually comfortable for a change and sleeping. I get up turn it off and get back into bed and try to make him get up. He has the nerve to turn over and tell me hes not going to work today because he has a sore throat! What a freaking BABY!!!! I seriously thought I was going to lose my temper, so I got up and went about my business and just left the house I didn't even say goodbye. When I get home tonight he better have done some damn chors. His throat hurt ARGHHHH!!!

Ok Rant over LOL 

dmcgoey

I fortunately do not have any of these issues, but you can take care of it very simply....just stop taking care of him and take care of yourself.  Don't make his breakfast or coffee and don't make his dinner.  Make your own sit and enjoy it and when he asks why you didn't do it for him, just say it was too much for you and then say, remember how hard it was for you to go to work when you had your sore throat, I feel 10x's sicker.    Don't sweat this kind of stuff...  Good luck!

mols99

Yeah, guys are wimps.  My husband had the nerve to complain about how bad his flu shot hurt when I was getting two progesterone injections twice a week in my hips with an inch and a half long needle for pretty much the entire pregnancy.  I just had to laugh and make fun of him for being a baby.  Yeah, guys just don't understand sometimes.

Jlobebe2012

Yes! i want to punch my DH in the face at least once a week, for simular reasons, or just certain things that leave his mouth, however I agree with a PP that the silent treatment works miracles!

Guys are worse than babies, you clean up after them, cook for them, tend to them when they are sick, the only you dont have to do is clean their diapers, however, maybe in time when we are old and wrinkly!

I am also a FTM, and as I tell my DH, yes I love you with all my heart, however, when my LO comes, you will no longer be the center of my world, sorry....

HPickle23

That's brutal! I'm sorry you ladies have such babies for husbands. PP is right though, Stop doing all that stuff for him. He'll figure it out. Let him know it's not going to be like this after LO arrives, he's gonna have to step it up. Take care of yourself. I'm glad the only thing my DH really depends on me for is food...he doesn't know how to cook anything besides mac and cheese and oven pizzas.

catrinawaves

dmcgoey:

I fortunately do not have any of these issues, but you can take care of it very simply....just stop taking care of him and take care of yourself.  Don't make his breakfast or coffee and don't make his dinner.  Make your own sit and enjoy it and when he asks why you didn't do it for him, just say it was too much for you and then say, remember how hard it was for you to go to work when you had your sore throat, I feel 10x's sicker.    Don't sweat this kind of stuff...  Good luck!

Ditto this. I think it, unfortunately, goes against what women are taught much of the time, but don't clean up after him, don't cook for him, etc. As a general rule, I think people will rise to our expectations of them. If you expect him to act like a baby, and treat him accordingly, that's probably what you'll get.

At this point, you need to take care of yourself, first and foremost! GL, and I hope you get some rest and feel better!

Twinkle5086

I think half of my problem is I just hate sitting around. I get bored and it seems the house is always a mess. I go for a week of like making him do it all himself with the exception of cooking because he can't cook. His idea of dinner is a can of spaghetti o's. I'm sure if I had the nursery to deal with I'd be a lot more lax about everything else and make him help. But unfortunately as of the moment we don't know if we are staying in our current location and I don't want to set it up and break it down again if he has a job change and we have to relocate. Hopefully we'll know by next week and I can either get started on packing or start putting the nursery together. 

prairiegurl24

i do not have this problem with my hubby, he will make his own stuff if he wants to, and lately he has been making my meals for me since i have been on partial bed rest, and now im on limited activities, i agree with don't make him anything, and just tell him too that you are feeling ten times worse yet you still do stuff around the house and still go to work, maybe he will feel guilty

AliW220

My ex had similar behavior. Sat on his a$$ all the time, lost multiple jobs for calling in for every little minor thing, never appreciative of the things I did for him.  Looking back on it, I realize now that I enabled his behavior.  Yes, he was a lazy ungrateful lying sack of manure. But me making his lunches, doing all his laundry, babying him the same way his mother had, didn't let him grow up, and made me so resentful and angry toward him.

I think both you and your hubby would benefit from a good chat about sharing responsibilities.  You'll only get more bitter towards him as time goes on, and it needs to be confronted sooner rather than later.  Not that you have to make it into a fight, but  let him know that you just can't keep doing what you do.

Some guys need direct "you need to help me with ______" in order to realize that they should get off the couch.  For example - my SO is just clueless about certain things, like dirty counters or dishwasher full of clean dishes.  It takes me 5 seconds to kindly ask "while I cook supper can you please wipe down the table and put the dishes away?".  And then that light bulb goes off in his head that, hey, I'm cooking supper so he might as well take the few minutes to help get things done too.  Hmm... I should probably add that before I moved in, he was a single father, so I think he appreciates the things I do more than a man who hasn't been through a situation like that. Anyways, good luck, and really do get it all figured out before baby comes!!

jineau

I felt like that last night. After cleaning up for dinner i played with our 2 kids for half an hour then got each of the ready for bed, bath brushing teeth, books and tucked in. took the dog out and got the dog settled. Then I prep lunches for the next morning and get their clothes out for school the next day. Then close down the house. I made it to the room finally and did my night time bathroom routine and come into lay down. Mind you this whole hour and a half hes laying in bed playing games on his phone. I wanted to make the bed so I could finally lay down after an exhausting day. I have to rip the blankets out from under him as he complains that I'm taking all the pillows. I finally found a system with the pillow configuration that helps me sleep better. i climb into bed turn on the dvr to watch a show that I had been looking forward to. he keeps interrupting with really stupid things making me have to rewind this same part 3 times finally I just snap. pause the show look him straight in the eye and say are you done is there anything else you would like to get out now. I'm giving him my undivided attention and he calls me cranky. So I explode and give him an itemized list of everything I did that day and evening while he was chillen in bed playing on his phone.I went to bed frustrated just thinking when this baby comes I sure hope he'll help out more in the evenings, because 3 kids will take me forever to put down. i went to sleep using the silent treatment I think he got the hint.

honeybee #1

Wow, I'm suddenly glad my DH has a legitimate reason to complain. Saturday before last he broke a tooth and had it pulled on Tuesday. Thay didn't give him antibiotics for the infection they knew was there and it spread. Then the stitch didn't hold up and pulled out the clot and it developed dry socket. Which I hear is pretty much a living hell, so at least when he b!tches I don't feel like he's being a wuss.

reason00

dmcgoey:

I fortunately do not have any of these issues, but you can take care of it very simply....just stop taking care of him and take care of yourself.  Don't make his breakfast or coffee and don't make his dinner.  Make your own sit and enjoy it and when he asks why you didn't do it for him, just say it was too much for you and then say, remember how hard it was for you to go to work when you had your sore throat, I feel 10x's sicker.    Don't sweat this kind of stuff...  Good luck!

 

I also have no complaints about my pregnancy, but I do agree with this.