XH wants to change LOs last name...

Ariana2O11

so that it's hypenated with his last name in addition to mine. Lo currently has my last name because XH was not in our life in the beginning when Lo was born (his choice) so I gave the little guy my last name. 

 

He has now appeared and not only wants to add his last name but also wants to see LO 3 weekends a month.

 

How realistic is the possibility that the court will allow both to happen?

I want every other weekend visitations. 

 

 

JCGreene85

DS has my last name. EX now wants DS to have his last name or at the least hyphenation. I've heard it's honestly a coin toss.. I think I have a decent case for a judge to side with me on keeping it the same. It's something I worry about a lot because he is so pushy. I didn't agree to it in mediation so it's likely we'll go to court over it. 

Do you have anything court ordered? How old is your LO? Eow is pretty standard.  

nanabanana06

Since your LO is so little they probably won't even agree to overnights until they are over 18 months of age. They will probably give him a few hours a few times a week at most for now. Until you child is much older.

Also, both parents have to consent to the name change. I was looking into changing DD's last name to my FI after we get married (she currently has mine). Both parties have to agree. So if you don't want it then don't sign the paper. 

PrincessFiona9

Nana_Osaki06:

Since your LO is so little they probably won't even agree to overnights until they are over 18 months of age. They will probably give him a few hours a few times a week at most for now. Until you child is much older.

Also, both parents have to consent to the name change. I was looking into changing DD's last name to my FI after we get married (she currently has mine). Both parties have to agree. So if you don't want it then don't sign the paper. 

This.

JCGreene85

That's not true where I am. Yes, both parties have to agree if you want to change the last name to let's say, your FI. BUT if he wants to hyphenate it all he has to do is petition the courts and the judge hears both sides and makes a decision. Did he sign the BC? Bc if he did you have a decent chance of keeping it. 

clichequeen

I believe the laws vary by state.  I am in NY, and I changed my son's last name (from my ex's to mine) several years ago, because he was not in the picture at all.  I only had to notify him, and then he had the choice to fight it (which he didn't).  I didn't need his permission.

TurtleGirl3-4

My ODS's Father was not involved at all after our divorce when ODS was 6 months old. When ODS was just over 3 years old I petitioned the court to change his name since his Father was not involved. His Father tried to say if I did X with the CS he would sign the papers to change ODS's name. I didn't do X, appeared before a judge and got his names changed even without his Fathers approval. It can really go either way depending on your LO's age, state laws and the judge hearing the case.

Regarding visitation....EOW is the norm but don't count on no overnights until LO is 18 months. My YDS had overnights from 11 months on when I divorced his Dad.

Jennis22

Three weekends a month seems off, even for older children. If you both work full-time that would only leave you with one weekend a month? Not fair.

Unless you decided to switch months so that he'd have three weekends one month and you'd have three the next. It's uncommon, but as long as you both agree to it, it can happen.

I don't know about the last name issue. I guess that would depend on what state you're in!

Snowypumpkinqueen

LO will be getting my last name. If XH doesn't see LO much I would definitely not give him the last name!