my little nephew

b0undl0v3

My little nephew,who's mom was pregnant the same time as me with his Brother,was always so happy when he seen me when i was excepting and always asked how baby Bentley or Elise was doing and would tell me he was going to play with baby and wanted to feel my belly.He was always so sweet about it for a 3 year old,when i was in labor he would tell his mom he wanted to see me and she would tell him no she is in labor and he knew that he was going to have a buddy.

after my son was born still-born my nephew asked his mom where my baby was after seeing me,she just told him"she doesn't have a baby"ever time he asked.  well the other day he asked me "oh honey!where is your baby!?how is it doin!?" all i could say was "i love you" i felt horrible,it just made me think that terrible reality and think all over again,was there something i could have done more?is it my fault,i did everything i could right?..

dandywarhol

{[hugs}} it isn't your fault. you did everything right.  {{hugs}}

some of the most innocent comments or questions can be the hardest, especially when dealing with children.  i had lunch with a group of my mother's friends today (kind of a wisdom circle of comfort) and one of the ladies brought up that she had lost her sister many years ago when the sister (Alice) was just 6yo.  my friend said years later she spoke with someone who had been best friends with Alice and she said that as a child and playmate of Alice, it was difficult because back then no one spoke about Alice's death to her.  The point of this anecdote is even though your little nephew is only 3, it might be worth having someone (not necessarily you, unless you'd like) talk with your nephew about your son's death. 

roxyttandme

I can remember answering the door the day we got our of the hospital. My two nephews were so uncomfortable and scared to see me. It broke me heart. 

(((hugs)))

Not an easy situation - ever!  

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mrsnapaluch

This was NOT your fault. You did everything you could. There is no mommy on this board that didn't do everything they could to protect their baby. We all feel guilty and that is one of the things that proves what a wonderful mommies we are. Your son would not want you to torture yourself over something you had no control over. I am so sorry for your loss and T&P are coming your way. BIG HUGS! 

swenie1234

My BF sister just lost her baby at 21 weeks. She has a 3 year old and told her and other neice/nephews that Auntie had an angel instead of a baby. There is a book that talks about giving births to Angels in stead of babies, they bought it at the hospital gift shop.

 So sorry for your loss.