Intro

pinacolodas

Hi everyone! I have lurked for awhile but now I am officially joining you. Dh and I are now separated, hoping to have a fast divorce. Pretty amicable, hoping it stays that way. Short story - I married a 13 year old boy trapped in a 37 year old body. Despite his desire to play video games for literally every waking hour outside of work he wants to have 50% custody of our 2 1/2 year old DD. He is a good dad and loves her but definitely doesn't put her needs first. Should I just see how it goes? After a few nights of her interrupting his game playing I think he will be begging me to have 100% custody.

I have been a SAHM for over a year so I have been job hunting non-stop. Lots of changes for us. Anyone share custody one week at a time? He wants to do alternating weeks with the other parent able to have 1 midweek visit. The thought of not seeing DD everyday is breaking my heart.

He would happily stay in the marriage (and provide finacially for DD and I - ie me be a SAHM) as long as he has no expectations except work. No housework, no family obligations (including holidays like Halloween and Christmas), no outings together. He wants to be able to devote all his time to World of Warcraft and becoming a grand master level player of chess. He honestly doesn't get that is not an option and not normal. He has aspergers and it gets worse the older he gets. I am tired of being a single parent in a relationship.

We have been married for 12 years. My heart is broken, mostly for the dream life I know I will never have. I keep reminding myself I never actually had that life. Anyways I am hoping to get lots of insight from you all!

DarthNBJenni

50/50 is not a good idea for a child as young as your DD. For younger children, stability is very necessary, with the non custodial parent having shorter, more frequent visits. The standard would be every other weekend, and one evening every other week, with holidays & summer break.

In all honesty, he's probably bluffing. Mine wanted full custody of my girls, offered to quit his job, and wanted me to pay child support on my "lucrative teaching salary". Yeah....judge saw right through that one. As it is, he rarely shows up for his scheduled visitation.  

JCGreene85

Do not agree to 50/50. She definitely needs stability. I am sorry for what you are going through, but it sounds like you are making the right decision for you and you LO.