Does your SO come with you to appts?

Tiffany5412

DH wants to come to all of my major appointments (first US, 16 week, etc) but this is also our first child together.

BetsyDavis

He came to all my appointments up to 20 weeks with my previous pregnancies. This baby he will miss the first few but will be there for the 2nd tri and part of the third because he'll be on seasonal layoff. Otherwise unless I develop complications again we will only go to the ones when he is not working. Though with two babes he may just stay home with them while I go. 

GracieBlue

DH will come to all the u/s appointments.  He would come to any/all if I asked him to, I just don't see the point of him taking time off of work for a 15 minute appointment!

3giraffes

venussapphire:

AuroraMarieMcG:

STW14:

bananers:

AuroraMarieMcG:

DH and I plan on him coming to all appointments while his schedule is flexible. He likes to be right there hearing stuff as I do, and it helps us remember questions/answers better (darn preganancy brain). However, I kind of wish he wasn't there for the first one. He still quotes what the doctor was saying during the rectal exam portion of the appointment... men can act like such children sometimes! LOL.

Dear God, why is there a rectal exam? Is this normal?

Ditto, I need to know!  I have my appointment tomorrow and DH is coming.  I was gonna have him wait in the waiting area during the exam and come back for the u/s and question and answer portion of the appointment. 

I never heard of a rectal exam... I can hear DH now.. "rectum.... damn near killed' em" 

Sorry - this will be kind of graphic for some!!! Well she was doing a pelvic exam, to check on everything to see if my body could actually support the pregnancy. So she had one hand on my belly and one hand "inside" of me feeling around my baby's new home, and all of a sudden she goes "and now to check the rectum" and just slid her finger in while she said it! Ahh! I was so shocked I didn't know what to do. LOL. I thought I was the only one that didn't know this would happen, so I'm glad you guys didn't know either! Glad I could share! LOL.

but WHY?! what is the benefit?

 My DH went to the first and may continue as he has Fridays off and doesn't have to take time off to go with me. 

I didn't have this with my DS and had a 7 wk appointment and this wasn't done either.  I've never heard of it until now!

naflmj

DH came to the first one, will come to the nt and the a/s and that's about it. I don't feel like he needs to take time off for them.

rayne779

DH missed the first one, but that was just a bunch of questions and a physical exam. He has been to both U/S's, and plans to come next week when we meet our midwife. After that, he will probably just come to any other U/S's we have.

Katie829

My husband went to the the first he will go to the next two. The next appointment we will hear the heartbeat and the appointment after is the a/s. 

colonialbride

Dh came with me to almost every appointment with my last pregnancy. So far he has been to 2 this time around. I don't expect him to come to all of them, but I really like him there for appointments when there is lab work because I HATE giving blood!!

LottaLattes

Mine wants to come for definitely all the ultrasounds and possibly all the appointments (though he doesn't really know what he's signed up for as they do internal checks toward the end, haha).  My X didn't come to any but the ultrasounds, and that was fine with me at the time.

historygirl1863

When we lived at our other base, DH was able to go to every appt (with DD) because 1 I didnt have my car anymore and 2 they had 6 other people who did his job, so it didnt matter. (I miss that base so much). Here on our new base its just DH and his supervisor, so itll be harder for him to get away. Hopefully he'll be able to come to the 20 week scan but Im not getting my hopes up.

PregNerd

STW14:

DH plans on going to all.  Not because I said so, but because that's what he wants!  

This!

It's our first so he wants to be a part of everything, get the information, ask his own questions.

If DH isn't available to go, my BFF is there for me (neither family lives in our city). I really enjoy having the support - it helps keep me calm more than anything. 

PAAZwife

DH made it to all but one or two of my appts with DS.  This time around the location of my midwives office is right near my work and no where near DH's work.  So I'll be going alone to most appointments.

BeerBeck

My husband came to every one of the appointments with our daughter, and will do so with this pregnancy too!  In fact, I ensure that all appointments are scheduled around his work schedule for this exact reason.  I couldn't imagine not having him involved.

Aamazing

AuroraMarieMcG:

DH and I plan on him coming to all appointments while his schedule is flexible. He likes to be right there hearing stuff as I do, and it helps us remember questions/answers better (darn preganancy brain). However, I kind of wish he wasn't there for the first one. He still quotes what the doctor was saying during the rectal exam portion of the appointment... men can act like such children sometimes! LOL.

 

I have never had a rectal exam at any point during my previous pregnancy and nothing so far this pregnancy.  Although I'm sure there was a medical reason for her doing it, I am quite sure it is not the norm.

As for the appointments, my DH came to every appointment last time around, and will be coming to them all this time as well.  I make a point to schedule them on his days off.  He comes because he really likes being involved in this way, even if I only pee in a cup and talk to the midwife briefly.  Gives him a chance to ask his own questions, listen to the heartbeat, and hear everything straight from the horse's mouth (I am notoriously bad at effectively communicating important information to other people)  

I personally love this arrangement. 

SummerMama12

He comes to ultrasounds; no need for him at the regular appointments.  He came to a few with our first, if his work schedule permitted.  I'm sure he would do the same now, but really, there is no need.  Plus, we have a 3-year-old to watch while I go to the dr.

rickisue80

Mine will most likely come to all (or almost all) of my appts until it's towards the end. He tries to be involved as much as he can. Plus, he's a guy's guy and likes to feel like he's protecting his little wifey by driving her around. lol

littlemaybaby

Last time, my DH went to the first appointment, ultrasound appointments, and then the appointments at the very end talking about L&D.

It will probably be largely the same this time around.  

littlemaybaby

Oh and on the rectal exam thing - my last OB did that at every physical exam (all my yearlies, my first pregnancy appointment, and my 6 week post partum). 

Believe it or not, it's fairly standard protocol for a full gynecological exam.  (https://library.mothernature.com/l/the-female-body-an-owners-manual/gynecological-exam_829.html)

My MW practice however does not do this and I'm not the least bit upset!!!

If you OB hasn't done it with previous manual exams, you probably have nothing to worry about . . .