etiquette question

clichequeen

so for those ladies who split up while pregnant, do you invite your STBXH's family to your shower?  should they just do something on their own for him?  i'm at a loss as to what's the right thing here...

achase123

We split when I was pg and we had a family party that included XH's family when DS was about a month old.  It was pretty awkward because his mom was and isn't happy about things so she made it uncomfortable.  But we just ignored her and had a great time.

clichequeen

that's what i'm worried about - that it may be awkward.  on one hand, i want them to know that they are welcome in her life (regardless of what her father does), but on the other hand, i really don't want to be bothered with them beyond that....

PrettyInPearls23

It's not quite the same thing, but DS turned 1 year old when XH and I were separated. I threw a joint party and it was extremely awkward. I'll never do it again. XH can throw DS his own birthday parties for his side of the family if he chooses to do so.

On a side note, I told XH later that night that I was filing for divorce.

clichequeen

thanks ladies.  yeah, i think i'm going to leave them out.  this whole situation is hard enough as it is.  i want to enjoy the good moments, without there being any awkwardness....

Annplus1

I am pregnant now, and my family shower is this Sunday. STBXH's family is NOT included, on purpose. But I believe they are throwing him a shower. My XMIL has two different mental illnesses, and I am not willing to go out of my way to invite that into my life. I want the shower to be as stress free and un-related to my marriage as possible.

 

MsJosie

I left my x-boyfriend when I was 4 months pregnant because he was doing cocaine and smoking marijuana and when I found out he started abusing and offered me 25K to have an abortion so I left the SOB. I have not invited or included him or his family in anything. Personally they don't deserve it and all they do is give me a hard time and make my life a living hell. My daughter is MUCH better off without him or his family in her life at all!!!