I need an outside point of view.. (Moving)

MAMAxB

DH, my mom, and I have been talking and this is obviously an emotionally driven decision (although financial too). I know ultimately we have to decide... but I guess I just want your guys thoughts/viewpoint/opinions regarding us moving back home. We have basically made up two options.

 

SCENARIO 1 (the original plan):

Details:

  * Moving in May or June when our lease ends 

  * Buying a house so we never have to move again!

Pros:

  * 6+ months for DH to find the best job possible

  * New baby is born here and we have a few months with just him or her

  * More time to save for a down payment

Cons:

  * No guarantees we will have enough saved to buy a house

  * We may have a harder time with manual underwriting with DH starting a brand new job

  * It's a long ways away

  * We shell out a LOT for rent/babysitting right now

 

 

SCENARIO 2:

Details:

  * Aggressively having DH look for a job asap

  * Moving shortly after the baby is born (February or March)

  * Renting something short-term (6 months) then buying

Pros:

  * Moving sooner, family will be around to help with 2u2

  * We would be able to rent up there for $200-300 less than we are renting for here (side note: we can break our lease w/o penalties if we accept a job out of state) 

  * Cheaper rent = more money to save each month for our DP

  * DH will have a 6 month history with his new job when we apply for our mortgage

  * Less expenses on gas for visiting/babysitting/etc.

Cons:

  * Packing and moving soon and in winter and with a newborn

  * Having to move two more times (to another rental.. THEN finally a house)

  * DH can't be as selective with job offers

Other random details...

  * DH has 2-3 jobs he COULD take right now (through family friends.. connection my parents have.. etc.) but they are not necessarily his first choice

  * We were approved for the mortgage amount we wanted last summer right when DH started a new job with about 1/3 of the DP we will have when we actually buy.. so I don't think it would be a problem for Scenario 1, but it may

  * FWIW.. we are about 6 hours away and in a different state from Point A to B

penguingrrl

I've moved several times over the past few years, twice while in my third trimester and once with two little kids. I will say that given how long it took everyone to adjust there's no way I would move twice in within a year. It was absolutely miserable getting the house packed up and the kids adjusted. We will be doing it again next summer and I'm  already dreading looking for a place, packing and moving with the kids again. We have no choice and this will be a happy move (DH will be graduating with his PhD and moving to his next job, which is awesome) I'm still dreading the move itself!

MAMAxB

I feel you penguingrrl.

We moved when I was 34 weeks pg with DD (3 hours away). And again when she was 6 months old (5 hours away).

I am so over moving.. that's why I'm ready to just settle!

penguingrrl

I so feel that.DHs career path means a two year postdoc next then hopefully we'll settle after that with a tenure track professorship! The moving sucks, but seeing him happier than he's ever been makes it worth it!

Sharon21

This what I would do if I were in your position with the details given. I would aim for scenario 1 but be flexible for scenario 2 if DH found a good job. I would let the job hunt take the lead on deciding when to move. If your DH finds a good job next month move then if he hasn't found a good one until closer to May then wait. I am all about financial security balanced with happiness. You will be happier when you move home but how happy will you be if your DH takes a not so good job (and is unhappy about it or doesn't make as much) and you have to move twice in the next year just to make the move happen a couple of months sooner?  

Also some of the pros in the second scenario aren't guaranteed. If your DH ends up being less selective about finding a new job to make the move happen sooner then even if you are saving money on rent it might be canceled out by the lower paycheck making it so you wont actually have more for a down payment. KWIM? I would have DH start looking for a job aggressively now and be flexible about the moving date.