intro + confusion

jcombs@utk.edu

This was my first pregnancy and I must say the entire time was one big "?"

 

I hadn't had AF since July 29th, had negative pregnancy tests mid September, then all of a sudden Oct 4th a BFP.  My husband and I were beside ourselves with excitement, but I had some worries. One, I had no idea how far along I was (best guess 5 weeks). First ultrasound showed nothing except a thickening uterine lining, then a few days later I had heavy cramps and bleeding. I know I was preggo, but was this a chemical pregnancy or miscarriage? I bled for 7 days and now nothing. I am still very sad, but ready to try again. I am going to find a new OB/GYN b/c mine answered hardly any questions for me, and, like the title says, I am just confused at this point. Any advice or clarity??

 

T&P's to all of you here! 

VineyardMel

I wish I had some advice, but just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for your loss and that you're going through this. ((Hugs))

babyquestnortheast

Unfortunately I don't have the answers that you need but definitely encourage you to seek out a new doctor if you don't feel like you are receiving the best care possible. You deserve that!

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had my m/c just a few days ago and received the official word from the dr today after my bloodwork came back.

So sorry - my thoughts and prayers are with you. Take the time you need to grieve and heal. It will not be easy but it does get a little better every day.

jcombs@utk.edu

I appreciate the kind words...I figured getting answers wasn't going to be that easy, but it was nice just getting it out there. My husband has been very sweet, but since I was not far along and he had not seen a baby, he doesn't quite understand why I am holding on to all the questions. It's one of those "that's life and we have to move on," but being the way I am makes that hard. I am def seeking a new doc. When my last appointment literally lasted 3 min with her not asking how I was or anything, I know she is not the doc for me.

 

Wish you all the best! 

mijakach

I am so sorry for your loss. Like you, this was also my first pregnancy and I feel like DH doesn't quite understand since I was only 7 weeks and it still hadn't really hit him yet that I was pregnant.

I definitely agree with others that you need to find a new doctor. It doesn't sound like this one was much help.

JessMike07

DS siggy warning! 

 

 

:::HUGS::: I'm sorry for your loss!!

Obviously I am NOT a doctor but from what you are describing and IF you were around 5 weeks along it was probably a chemical pregnancy. This is also considered a miscarriage and you have every right to grieve over your loss.

Did you have any hcg levels drawn? What were they??

My DH acted very similiar to yours. For me it almost destroyed our marriage. I never felt so disconnected in my life from him. It was awful. Men just view things totally different because they didn't actually go through it! We become mothers instantly and love our babies way before our husband does. Or at least we love them differently.

I would definitely seek out a new doctor if you aren't recieving the best care possible! I'm huge on women being their own health advocates because I've been through the ringer with docs in my area who could have cared less about my 4 m/c's before the age of 27.

jcombs@utk.edu

Thanks for sharing and so sorry for your losses. My levels did go down. At my first appointment to confirm the pregnancy they were at 990...the following monday at 440, then went to 188 and 20 as of this past tuesday. Come to find out, after the m/c was already in progress, my progesterone was really low. My wonderful doc, tho, never informed me of this so next pregnancy I was told to get it checked immediately. It has been a roller coaster, but it's nice to get to share and hear perspectives from others who are going through the same thing.