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Babies: 6 - 9 Months
Can I do a UO?
That stands for Unwanted Opinion, doesn't it? Well watch out, I'm doing it!
I honestly think Dr. Sears and his Attachment Parenting movement have done a lot of harm, possibly more harm than good. I believe he means well, and I'm guessing that his books are a response to a previous generation of possibly even worse parenting "rules", but I think he presents his personal opinions as scientific facts, and in an unnecessarily judgmental tone.
Yes, co-sleeping, baby wearing, nursing on demand, etc are all wonderful things. Every parent should be aware of them and free to use them if they want to. But there are completely valid reasons for a family to make choices different from what he pushes, and its ridiculous to paint them all as "unattached" "bad" parents because of it.
Why can't someone with impressive credentials write a short, popular book that just says, "Here are all the different ways people parent, do what feels right to you and trust your judgement"?
Ugh. And yes, this is a response to the "OMG you let your baby nap in the carseat??? OMG you feed your baby *oatmeal*?? Aren't you worried you're going to damage the breastfeeding relationship??" lady at storytime today. Seriously people, get a freaking grip.
Sincerely,
Water-birthing, pro-vax, baby-wearing, stroller-using, BLW, sometimes co-sleeping/sometimes CIO-using mom who is doing just fine as a parent, thankyouverymuch. 
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Re: Can I do a UO?
AMEN!
I totally get what you are saying, except for one small part. I don't think that NonAP = unattached.
I hate the way his alternate schedule is being used by so many people now. The reason he came up with an alternate schedule was to get those that would not otherwise vax to actually vax their kids...not because he thought that everyone should delay vax.
Sometimes I really just want to tell people to "suck it" their their opinions. Not you...but the lady that make the asstastic comment to you.
Honestly, the McJudgy mom seemed like a nice person, and I really don't think she realizes how that sort of thing sounds to other parents... but I do think it's hard to read Dr. Sears and not come away from it using the same sort of tone that he does:
So basically, do what feels right to you, as long as it's what I'm advocating, otherwise you're a bad parent.
Eh, it probably depends on where you live. Yeah, I live in an Ivy League town, so everyone is up on the AP stuff, but in most places people have literally never heard of attachment parenting, so it's not affecting anything. The truth is a lot of that stuff IS scientific fact, in that research shows benefits for all of it, so presenting it as such shouldn't be considered harmful. The same goes for Ferber and the What To Expect series and Harvey Karp and the Mayo Clinic and AAP and WHO, etc etc etc.
But it's up to parents to show a little critical thinking when they hear opinions no matter WHO it's from -- I mean, if I listened to every bit of advice I heard, I'd have put rice cereal in LO's bottle at 3 months and also not fed him solids until a year. I'd be bedsharing and also putting him in a crib on the other side of the house at one day old. I'd be breastfeeding every hour and also formula feeding!
Thank you for saying this. William Sears is VERY pro-vax.
I say this all the time!!! Aahhhh if only my credentials were more impressive
But it wouldn't be popular. Common sense isn't trendy right now.
Seriously though, no matter what your parenting approach is, you will get judged for it by someone. Just try not to be that someone.
This is exactly how I would summarize Attachment Parenting, FTR.
Sorry you were judged.
Have you really read a lot on Dr. Sears? Because it seems you haven't.
https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/attachment-parenting/what-ap-7-baby-bs
AP is an approach, rather than a strict set of rules. It's actually the style that many parents use instinctively. Parenting is too individual and baby too complex for there to be only one way. The important point is to get connected to your baby, and the baby B's of attachment parenting help. Once connected, stick with what is working and modify what is not. You will ultimately develop your own parenting style that helps parent and baby find a way to fit ? the little word that so economically describes the relationship between parent and baby.
AP is a tool. Tools are things you use to complete a job. The better the tools, the easier and the better you can do the job. Notice we use the term "tools" rather than "steps." With tools you can pick and choose which of those fit your personal parent-child relationship. Steps imply that you have to use all the steps to get the job done. Think of attachment parenting as connecting tools, interactions with your infant that help you and your child get connected.
He definitely promotes certain choices, like BF/cosleeping/etc but I never felt that he "forced" parents into them.
I am a part time working mom who FF, bedshares, vaccinated on a regular schedule, etc but I still feel that Dr. Sears definition of AP is broad enough that I can connect with a lot of the choices but never felt like I could never use a stroller or I wasnt AP anymore. I feel his approach leaves a lot of wiggle room so you can make choices that work best for your family/your child.
I completely agree with you. We vaccinate 100% on schedule. My point is that people are always pointing to Dr. Sears as the one promoting delayed vaxing and I wanted to clarify that there are two (actually he has a few Dr sons) Dr Sears and the one that wrote all the books people often reference is not the one who wrote the Vaccine book.