Scared of doing it alone..

mpotts09

I am due in 9 days and the baby's dad is just now talking to me again since July...b.c he hasn't had a phone I guess. He texted me last week and I didn't really know how to handle it, if I should be calm and handle it well which I usually do, or blow up on him about everything. I asked if he was going to be at the hospital when I go into labor, he said idk if I wanna be there...he won't come until after he sees a picture of the baby. (bc he thinks the baby could be someone else's and he's not) So I said don't even come at all then, that's your choice. The last time we talked about names was before July..and he didn't like any of mine. He said it's hard to agree on a name that he has no part in? I was confused..then he said he'll think of one and it's been days and he hasn't gotten back with me. So at this point, I'm naming my son whatever I want and the dad will have to deal since he has "no part". I still love him...and wanted to be with him, but I know I deserve better than that and I want him to see his son but I can't force him. He has a 10 mo. old daughter with his ex too. I don't want a relationship with him bc of how bad he's hurt me throughout this whole pregnancy. I'm just scared of not finding anyone who will accept me and my baby Ik it will be hard, I just don't know how I'll do it alone and hoping the dad will help out and get to know his son. Then I think of holidays coming up like Thanksgiving and Christmas and his family will be coming from out of state and I just wonder if the baby will get to meet them, or if I willl have to be w/ the dad at his family gatherings  with the baby just so he can see them.We get along great when we see each other, so Idk how awkward it would be if I was there.. Idk..I'm thinking ahead and don't know how to handle it. Well I feel better..any advice would be great

blissfullyignorant

I'm usually a lurker but I'll respond since nobody else has.

It sucks sometimes. It's frequently hard. Sometimes it's lonely and you'll always have questions you may never get an answer for. I wish I had the perfect response but that's really all I've got. Your kid will make every second worth while.

For holidays, do what you can to be surrounded by love and friendship. Let his dad do what he wants and let him ask you if he's interested in seeing his son. He sounds like an a$$ and you ARE better off! Kudos to you for having the strength to realize that.

Don't worry about finding another man just yet. It's totally possible though. There's an intro post down the page and you can see a lot of the gals on this board are currently dating someone new.

mpotts09

Thank you so much!!

lilhotcandie69

If he has doubts about it being his kid he won't be there. And sadly the first pic can't always tell you something. Sounds like he's too immature. Sadly he won't be there to support you in labor which shows his true colors. Sadly, don't deal with him and find support outside of him. He's not worth it even though I understand its hard to deal with and except.

precbaby3

It is scary and very sad going it alone:(  I just try to do the best i can for my kids and hope that some day they will look back and say...I am glad that she was there for me and did everything she could to let me know how much i was loved...even if i am the only one that did love them!! Some day hopefully they understand that i did have them and do my best for them out of the GREAT amount of love i had for them and that hopefully it will be enough..Definately don't settle because you think that you can't find someone...you might find the man of your dreams tomorrow and he could absolutely love kids...if not, know that you have your baby and focus all that love towards that:)