So my first post on this board is a long DC vent - sorry about that

Cytina

I didn't realize there was a preschool board.

So, this one teacher at DC is a know-it-all, we'll call her Ms. C.  She is 25 and has no children of her own but thinks she knows more than the parents (I only mention age b/c it's not like she has 20 years of professional childcare experience).  I've heard her talk to the other teachers about some parents/children - i.e. this person needs to get rid of the binky, this parent needs to start cereal.  She's very opinionated.  I've personally had a couple of run-ins with her over the years about my kids and what I do vs. her opinion.  Earlier this year, we had a conflict over her not getting invited to my younger son's 1st birthday party and I went to the director b/c there were racial accusations for that one.

So this morning, MH got the boys dressed and my 3yo refused to wear anything other than pajamas (though he had sneakers on).  He is a "spirited" child and clothing is a battle we've agreed not to fight, because there are so many others. LOL  We get to school today and Ms. C. notices the pj's so I say jokingly "he refused to wear regular clothes today, what are you gonna do?"  She looks at me, then him and snidely says "Refused? S, are you the parent now?"  So I said she knows he can be tough, and we just didn't want to fight the battle this morning.  To which she replies, very condescendingly, "I would have been able to get him dressed."  I just again said something about not picking the battle and left.  I was so angry.  It's one thing if you want to give me CONSTRUCTIVE advice, but not just insinuate I'm a parenting failure.  Especially over something as silly as clothing.

I'm afraid if I confront her, it will turn ugly so I'm not sure what to do.  I don't want to let it go though b/c I'm sick of it, I'm sick of her holier-than-thou attitude.  Any thoughts?

FriskyPanda

She sounds like a ***. If you don't trust yourself to stay civil in a confrontation, I'd go to the Director with specific examples of her belittling parenting decisions made by you and the other parents. Let her know that you bring your children there to be cared for while you work, not to be judged on decisions you make for your family, and that it has to stop or you will find care elsewhere (if you are in a position to do so). I dont think I be able to deal with that. The attitude is not appropriate.

RoxBride

I think you need to go to the director and be very specific in your complaints, and provide as many examples of what you've personally seen. That's unacceptable. If they don't want a 3 year old there in pajamas, I understand that. But she didn't handle it correctly at all.

kmhunt11

FriskyPanda:

She sounds like a ***. If you don't trust yourself to stay civil in a confrontation, I'd go to the Director with specific examples of her belittling parenting decisions made by you and the other parents. Let her know that you bring your children there to be cared for while you work, not to be judged on decisions you make for your family, and that it has to stop or you will find care elsewhere (if you are in a position to do so). I dont think I be able to deal with that. The attitude is not appropriate.

 

Exactly.  You are the paying customer here.  This woman has got to go.  

angelakh

I wouldn't have been able to resist saying something really sarcastic like "Well, that's why I didn't worry about getting him dressed since you do such a great job at it." all the time smiling.  

I would go to the director.  If it doesn't get better then I would look into other childcare options. 

June2007

I remember the birthday party story and honestly, I don't know why you're still at that daycare. They sound extremely unprofessional and I wouldn't trust them to not harbor a grudge against my children because of their perceived injustice.

FeedTheCrocs

She sounds like a know it all ass.  It's none of her business how you parent your kids!  We send DD to school in pjs whenever she wants (not the ones she wears to bed but if she want to put on pjs or a tutu or mismatched shoes she can).  I'd talk to the Director about her attitude.

shellybird101

kmhunt11:

FriskyPanda:

She sounds like a ***. If you don't trust yourself to stay civil in a confrontation, I'd go to the Director with specific examples of her belittling parenting decisions made by you and the other parents. Let her know that you bring your children there to be cared for while you work, not to be judged on decisions you make for your family, and that it has to stop or you will find care elsewhere (if you are in a position to do so). I dont think I be able to deal with that. The attitude is not appropriate.

 

Exactly.  You are the paying customer here.  This woman has got to go.  

Really you would tell the director to fire her over this.  I get it she's a know it all & stepping over her boundaries, but FIRE her.  As a DC teacher myself I would not say some of the same things she has said out loud, but I DO know how she will feel if you want to get her fired for this small issue.  Just think about your JOB and that if you did something small and all your employees(clients) ganged up on you and got you FIRED, how would you feel.  This is her JOB not a HOBBY! IMHO

I feel that you should talk to the Director and tell her that you feel that some of the commets that this teacher is saying are crossing the line of teacher/client.  And if you are that upset then maybe it time to fine a different daycare.  But honestly I have a feeling that once you talk to the Director things will change. GL

tqsbride

I remember your birthday party story--wow, you're still roughing it at that daycare.  I agree with the previous posters, this is a matter that needs to be handled by the Director.  You should also expect an immediate change in this DC's attitude toward you or you will take your business elsewhere.  Because that's what DC is, a business. 

This person isn't family or a close friend who can simply voice their opinions--they're a paid employee who also isn't a licensed social worker, therapist, specialist, etc.  She apparently takes her job in this tough economy for granted.  She needs to go.