Question for moms that had babies right after the other

Cheeb

My daughter is about to turn nine months old and I feel that right now is a good time to start trying for #2, or rather I feel like having another baby. Now who better to ask then the women that have done it! Is this a good idea or is it the sort of thing that women should be warned away from. What is the gap between your kids and are you happy with that gap?

CaitlinJ22

ours are 18 months apart and I got my BFP when DS was 3 days shy of 10 months old. I love the age gap. We planned it, but it happen SO fast that we were still in shock. Of course we were and are very happy it was fast. 

It depends on a lot of factors if its right for you. If you are emotionally, and financially ready then great. I think having a helpful partner is very nice as well You can't prepare for it really, but you have to realize its a lot of work now for us as parents, but as the kids get older they will benefit a lot from it. Thats what someone told me. I talk to many people who are less than 2 years apart with their sibs and they love it. Its also nice to have kids in the same toy range so they share toys, and when we go to disney they will like the same rides most likely since they are so close in age.

We wanted to have kids while I was young and we wanted at least 3 so we wanted to have smaller gaps. I dont want to be in my later 30's deciding whether I should have more.

We also have a steady income with DH's job, and it allows me to stay home. I dont know how moms who work out of the house do it with daycare costs. If I had to work outside the home, I wouldve waited a until my oldest was 3 to have #2.  But I love being a SAHM and love watching my kids love on each other.

One more thing that you may love to hear. DD just recently learned how to say I love you, and today she came up to DS and said "I love you Winn (Finn " and he hugs her and says "I love you too Eva" LOVE it  Its moments like that, that I am SO excited we made this decision. 

marielovestimothy03

My first 2 are 16.5 months apart (got my BFP for #2 when #1 was about 8.5 months old - we planned it and I got pregnant right away) and I LOVE it. We were planning on doing 2u2 again in a few years (similar spacing around that 16-18 month gap) but thanks to a little BCP fail we're expecting our 3rd who will be about 19.5 months younger than #2. I'm pretty excited about it though, Dh and I both grew up with 2 siblings close in age (all less than 2 years apart too) and we loved the dynamic.

My kids are SO sweet together though. They are so much fun. Lots of work but totally worth it! I couldn't imagine it any other way

12bailey18

I got pg with DD when DS was 10 months old. I like this age difference and really, I don't know any different so it works for me!

12bailey18

12bailey18:

I got pg with DD when DS was 10 months old. I like this age difference and really, I don't know any different so it works for me!

I should also add that it was planned. We always said we wanted our kids close in age. The first month off BCP we got pg.

kcisthebombdotcom

Just to let you know, whenever this question is asked in any forum, I'd say about 98% of moms, whether their kids are 9 months or 9 years apart, love the gap between their kids.

To answer your question, my kids are 12.5 months apart and I love this gap. Honestly, I wish I had them even closer.

memali26

My #2 is only a month old, but so far I love it. I got my BFP just a few days before DD1 was 11 months, so my girls are 19 months apart. DD1 is all about her baby sister - she asks to see her first thing in the morning, is always giving her kisses and hugs and trying to share with her, "helping" change diapers and give her bottles. DD2 will sit and watch DD1 talk to her longer than anything else holds her attention. I am so excited to see how their relationship grows as they get older. It is hard having two so young who still need so much, but I feel like it's so worth it to give the girls the gifts of a close sibling.

kagl04

My 2 are 13.5 months apart. We are only 3 weeks in but I'm loving it! We started trying and got pregnant when DD was 5 months old and it was planned. DS was 5 weeks early, so they are a little closer than we originally wanted, but we wouldn't change it! My DD is already so in love with her baby brother!

Mereou12

My boys are 21 months apart. I got pregnant right around DS1's first birthday. At the moment it's pretty exhausting, but everyone tells me that it really is SO worth it after awhile.

LJR 84

Mine are 12.5 months apart and I love it...as I'm sure everyone else will say! However, it is a lot of work. I stay at home, and come 7 I'm thinking about bed! I'm sure that will get better once ds sttn. We plan on having another and we are hoping that they'll be about 18 months to 2 years apart. I'm not sure I'd be willing to have two so close together again...only because I felt like I was pregnant for two years straight!

Katefor4

DD #1 turned 5 in August

DD #2 will turn 4 in December (16 months apart)

DS is 17 months

#4 is due in March (will be 22 months apart)

 

Love all of the spacing in the family.  I see my girls play together and have a really special bond.  They are also on the same schedule and need the same thigns for the most part.  I also see how they help their little brother.  We would have had #3 closer but we had a mc in there.   I think this is perfect right now.

rgtsmom01

Mine are 10 months apart and I love it.  I am already seeing the benefits of them playing together and the oldest one can't wait to go see the youngest in the mornings when he wakes up.  It's really fun.  We only wanted 2 so I knocked it out

Unknown

This content has been removed.

marielovestimothy03

McRib:

I got my BFP when LO was 7 months and they will have 16 months between them. I can't speak to the reality of 2u2 for a few more weeks but the pregnancy was not that bad. I say the sooner the better. It is harder now that DS is so mobile but he was not walking until I was well into the 2nd trimester so that helped a bit. The pregnancy part has not been so bad for me but I'm so glad it is almost over. DS is also in daycare 3x a week while I work to those days are actually easier for me than being home with DS, esp now at the end of pregnancy.

I can definitely attest to the bolded! DC1 was only 8.5 months when I got my BFP for DC2 and didn't walk until 13 months so I was past the worst of my morning sickness and early pregnancy fatigue. This time DC2 just turned one and is just starting to walk and it is EXHAUSTING. Granted I have two kids to chase after but man, I definitely took for granted those non-walking days the first time around. Its a lot more exhausting to chase a walker/runner. 

mrsseguin

My kids are 25 months apart.  I'm glad they are close, but to do it again, we'd wait till they were closer to 3 years apart.  We have had a hard time adjusting from 1-2 kids.  It's hard.  Doable, but hard.  Now that they are a bit older and sleeping through the night, and in a good routine, it's much easier. 

sweetpea2003

Mine are 16 months apart.

For me, 2u2 has been a roller coaster.  I have had great days, bad days, been thrilled and surprised.  It has also been an exhausting year...  DH left for deployment the day my son turned 6 months and he is still gone.  DS turns one next week.

Overall, I am happy we did it.  I love having two kids and love the lessons they both learn by not being the "only".  The past few months have proven challenging.  DD, who is typically a very laid back girl, has gotten frustrated since DS has been mobile and more in her space and toys.  It has surprised me because she had been so easy going up until this point.  We are working through it and she is getting more used to it.  So I guess we are in a "down phase" at the moment.

Would I do it again?  Yes.  I wouldn't change a thing about either of my kids.  But we haven't decided if we will have #3 and if we do we will obviously have a bigger age gap. 

I think so much of this experience has to do with the amount of support you have and the temperment of your kids.  I am pretty easy going and can laugh at things so I have done fine despite the fact my husband has been gone for so long.  But I know I would love it more if he were home and I wasn't running around like a chicken with my head cut off all the time. 

t.bird

my girls are 14 months apart.

besides the fact that my 2 year old all but detests her little sister 95% of the time- i love it. she'll grow out of it...eventually.

pinkeggs

My girls are 19 months apart and honestly, I pretty much hated the first year with two. Neither of them STTN for a 10 month overlap and I pretty much wanted to die some days. If we had family nearby, I am sure it would have made a huge difference. I felt like they both kind of got screwed out of one-on-one attention they needed because I was so exhausted all the time.

However, now they are 3 & 1.5 and I really like it. They enjoy the same toys and activities and play together instead of just around each other. They look for each other all the time and DD2 asks for DD1 when she is at preschool. They're turning into really good friends.

At this point I can say that it would have been harder on DD1 if we had waited until she was 2 or 3 to add a sibling. She was so young at the time, we really didn't deal with jealousy or aggression issues when we brought home DD2.

 

BrittKav

My girls are 14 months apart and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. I think it is the most perfect age gap ever. My only problem with it is that breastfeeding for at least a year is very important to me, and BFing through a pregnancy is tough. I'd space #3 and #4 the same way if I weren't worried about BFing.

juliane2004

My kids are 14 months apart and I love it. No jealousy when DS was born because DD was so little and didn't really know she was an only child till then. Now at 10 months and 2 years they play together.

Echowysp

We got pregnant when ds was 14 months old.  So they are 23 months apart and I love it.  He was a bit more independent when she came, which made things a lot easier.  He also PTd shortly after she was born, so I didn't have that long with 2 in diapers.

Tanya287

My daughter is 10 months old and we just found out that we are expecting baby #2 (planned). We are thrilled. The two of them will be about 16 months apart. I'm sure that having two under two will be a challenge at times, but I wanted my DD1 to grow up with a sibling close in age. My sister and I are less than two years apart and have always been close. I think you should do whatever feels right for you and your family. Good luck and God Bless!

 

macchiatto

I really did have babies right after the other; they are 7 minutes apart.

I think every spacing has its pros and cons. If I were to choose I probably would've gone with about 2.5 years in between kids. 2u2 is not something I would have chosen but obviously with twins, you don't really get a choice.

AB&TB

DS is 3

DD#1 is 18mo (20 months apart)

DD#2 is 6mo (12.5 months apart)

 

I loved the spacing between 1 & 2.  And I am so grateful that my #3 is patient.  But I do think the spacing between 2 & 3 is a little too close.  I prefer the 15 month+ spacing I think.

We will begin TTC #4 when #3 is around 10 months.  So if all goes well they will be around 18-19 months apart.

 

BetsyDavis

I got pregnant with DD2 when my DD1 was 13 months. It was exhausting. Being pregnant and chasing a toddler was more work then I ever thought it would be plus I had complications. The hardest part was when I had DD2. DD1 was a nightmare so jealous. I ended up quitting BF at 2 weeks because anytime I tried too she would throw huge fits and hit me or the baby. Now that DD2 is 3 months she is great she's my biggest helper. She still gets mad if DD2 touches any of her special toys but other then that she kisses and hugs her all the time and tries to help with everything. So my girls are 21 months apart. With baby number 3 on it's way DD2 and this one will be about 10 to 11 months apart(I've been induced early every pregnancy so far so they may end up 10 months instead of 11). And DD1 will be about 32 months older the new baby. It's not what we planned but I couldn't imagine it any other way.