Ferber... this sucks

drpayne

So, we started the Ferber method Thursday night in the hopes things we be going pretty well by the end of the weekend.  The beginning of the night doesn't go horribly and he's been falling asleep within 30 minutes at the most.  The problems start when he wakes up later.  He wants to eat around 3 or 4 (prior to Thursday he was eating around midnight too so he's actually dropped a feeding already).  When I put him back down he fights sleep so much more than he did at the beginning of the night.  This morning we caved around 5:45 and brought him to bed with us because he'd been crying for an hour and we were exhausted.  I know we need to be consistent but I'm so freaking tired.  We don't mind him sleeping with us part of the night, honestly...but I know that if we wait to sleep train until he is sitting/pulling up, etc. it's just going to be harder.  I also know being inconsistent is counterproductive... but those last couple of hours of sleep before starting the day are much needed!  I don't even have it in me to tackle naps yet.  Anyone else have a harder time at certain times of night than others?  Other advice? TIA

sbmp10

We haven't done full out ferber yet as DS is a little young still but we did ferber and then CIO with DD.  One of the things we found with DS that seemed to help in the early morning is room temp.  We keep it cool in the house at night usually 68 but we programmed the heat to come one at 3am as opposed to 5am and set it at 72.  That seems to have helped a bit.  I should say that wake up time for us is 6 or 6:30 becuase of our work schedules.

erbear

He sounds like he might be a little too young still. I think I'd give it up for now (especially if we were on night 3 and my kiddo was still crying 30 minutes when we put her down and for an hour in the night) and try again in a month.

kewltif

How many night feedings are you trying to tackle at once? I wouldn't use Ferber to cut out more than one night feeding at a time, because LO might actually be hungry by the next feeding time.

agytay

We are in the same place -- sleep training and cutting night feedings. We plan to tackle night feedings first and then move to Ferber. Someone  suggested that we offer water during the night feedings instead of breast milk. Apparently, it is supposed to take 3 nights for you LO to figure that only water will be offered and not wake up again. My friend tried it with her little one. She said it only took one night and he never woke up again. I pray that this is me. Fingers crossed! 

mommy452011

This is interesting.

I BF/pump and am curious about the water thing. How many oz and how old is your LO?

 

My little lady has NEVER...I repeat...NEVER STTN yet ..... sslleeppyy parents!

agytay

My LO is 7 months old and started solids at 6 months. My ped said it was okay for him to have up to 4oz of water per day. In general, he takes in very little water during the day (max 1oz), but I plan to give him up to 3oz at his 2am night feeding since that is the one I am trying to eliminate first. If that works out, I will attempt to do the same with the 10pm feeding. I can report back on Tuesday (i.e., day 3) and let you know how it goes.

katlizabeth

kewltif:

How many night feedings are you trying to tackle at once? I wouldn't use Ferber to cut out more than one night feeding at a time, because LO might actually be hungry by the next feeding time.

I would agree with this.  And if OP is feeding and then putting her LO down, maybe just rock to sleep at that hour and count your blessings that you're getting sleep until 5ish!

Ernie52408

We are in our first week of Ferber so I know your pain. A few nights DS has STTN until 7 or 8, others he wakes up at 4:30.

Have you read his book? He suggests while training that they may be waking up much earlier than normal, and it may be impossible for your baby to fall back to sleep. He suggests to wake up and begin your morning routine and do not let them go back to sleep in another room. It's hard but you have to be consistent.

drpayne

I guess I should also mention that I am more concerned with him being able to fall asleep on his own than cutting out night feedings.  He just happened to drop the first feeding on the first night we started Ferber.  

If I knew he'd eventually start sleeping on his own, I wouldn't push it now.  I don't dislike him sleeping with us... I just don't want to do it forever and I'm afraid if we wait, it's only going to get harder.  I've talked to so many people who said "yeah, I thought he'd eventually just become a better sleeper and two years later he is still sleeping with us."