You know what I really hate? (fill in the blank with your own too)

lovemymaddy

I really hate that after school yesterday a student was walking down the hall with their mom. While passing my room I heard the student say, "This teacher just had her newborn baby die."  Ouch. I heard that.  Made me sad.

Additionally, I hate the head tilt that people do when they look at you. I'm sure you know what I mean. It's the head tilt to the side that accompanies the look in their eyes as they ask, "How are you?"  Ugh. Do you really need an answer to that question?

Sorry girls. It's three weeks today since he passed away. I think I'm just having a bitter morning.  

What do you hate??? 

kdp2008

Ugh, I HATE the head tilt too! 

I also hate that just because I lost my children some people think that my advice about infants, mothering, or care of a baby does not matter or that I don't know what I am talking about since my children are not physically here. I got the major blow off last weekend from someone and thought I was going to throat punch her. 

niknak1128

I think you're doing great for 3 weeks out.. better than I was doing at 3 weeks out.  I'ts been 5 weeks since we lost Brooke and I feel like I'm still a little bit bitter sometimes. 

I hate that I had to tell my 'friend' last night to STOP texting me about her accidental pregnancy. I hate that she didn't remember all on her own.

 I hate that my mom keeps telling me that she can't understand the loss I feel but that she still feels the loss of her divorce. Not the same thing mom. I love you but not the same thing. 

I hate that my husband thinks that I should be 'over it'. 

I hate that every time I talk about someone asks me if I need to seek counseling. 

 Ugh. Thank god for this board. You are my counseling. ~

Shayna0182

I hate that people assume that just because I am 28, I have no problems with pregnancy.  Well I have no problem getting pregnant, but staying pregnant is my issue, so Fvck off!

I hate that my own mother keeps telling what a bad idea she thinks it is for my dh and I to even think about ttc again.  I have told that her this will be thoroughly discussed with my high risk doctor, and it will not be without thoughtful consideration. 

I hate that people tell me I'm lucky to have ds, and should just call it a day.  Meanwhile, those are always the people who have never had a loss, have had 2-3 full term pregnancies.  Just shut-it already!

Last, I hate that everyone tells me that I can always adopt.  Like adoption is just some magical cure.  We may go that route evenutally, but it's not particularly comforting when I talk about losing my girls.

LoveOfMikesLife

oh I HATE the head tilt!!!!

I hate that everyone watches me like I'm a train wreck about to happen. It's like oh she's going to have a break down soon and I want to be there to watch.

this on is really vain: I hate the way my breast look now if I had someone to show for it I'd be fine but I don't! I want my perky boobs back

krysiahamaty

I hate people constantly telling me God needed him more than I do. I need and want him here with me more than anyone or anything. My family is very religious. Me, not so much, not anymore....

I hate that my breasts were leaking. Breast feeding is something I really looked forward to. It broke my heart every time I saw a leak. 

 And I just plain hate the fact that my Jack is not here with me.  

figgs0831

niknak1128:

I hate that I had to tell my 'friend' last night to STOP texting me about her accidental pregnancy. I hate that she didn't remember all on her own.

I hate that my husband thinks that I should be 'over it'. 

I hate that every time I talk about someone asks me if I need to seek counseling. 

This..... I am still getting it now and hate it.  I would also like to add that I hate the following comment I have been getting from my 8.5 month pregnant friend with accidental pregnancy... " Oh... don't worry, you will get to experience this someday.."  You know what... Eff you!

niknak1128

Oh!  How about when I first started taking DS back to daycare and everyone was looking at me like I was going to start snatching up babies! Hellooo I dont' want your babies..I want my babies! Geesh! 

Yeah and well you could always adopt or be thankful for what you do have.. like you're not already thankful for what you do have. That one really makes me angry and DH has even said that to me a few times referred to DS.  Like I would ever not be thankful for DS? only every single day that I'm alive but that doesn't mean that it hurts any less to go through any of this. 

roxyttandme

I hate pity. I don't need people to feel sorry for me. If they need to feel sorry for someone - they can think of my daughter - not me. She suffered more than we did. She was the victim - not us. 

magdalina.h

I despise the head tilt

I hate when people say Oh you're all better now that Lucas is here. Ummm no. I still miss my Aidan just as much today as I did at 3:06pm on 2/9/10.

Mrs Nice

I hate when ppl say "don't worry, you WILL be a mother someday." Um, What?! I AM a mother already! Just because he was born still does not mean that I am not his mother!

schenkertobe

{hugs}

starrkitten89

I also really despise the head tilt.Although we got it more when A was in the hospital than when she passed,but it is the most obnoxious thing.ever.

I hate that when my boss hires new staff,she tells them about my loss,and then promptly tells them to not talk to me about it.I love to talk about my daughter!So now when I do talk about her,everyone looks around like "oh crap,she's talking about her kid,which I was told not to talk about.What do I do?"

I hate when people ask us if we feel we made the right decision,and when we tell them yes,they say "well,doctors aren't always right,you know".I know that.We had specific criteria,and once Adria had those things happen and there was almost zero chance,we went to comfort care.I don't like when people make me feel guilty for having compassion for my child's suffering.I know that isn't how they mean it but it still makes me mad.

MrsRiceARoni

There are a whole lot of things I hate but here's a few

I hate the first time I see someone, I know it's been 7 months but I've still managed to avoid some people, which is quite easy since most of my family is out of state. But unfortunatly Thanksgiving which is usually my favorite day of the year will be the first time I see about 40 people from my family. Better start preparing myself for the sympathetic looks and the ackwardness of people not knowing how to act around me. *sigh*

I hate when my mom calls me and asks over and over again if anything "exciting" is going on I know she's leading trying to get me to tell her I'm pg again, maybe she doesn't know mh told me that she told him after my loss that we "had to wait a year before trying again"?? or perhaps she just "forgot". I think she'll shut up now that I told her I have PCOS and will be on bcp for several months.

I hate when people tell me to take advantage of this extra time I have with mh. Are you kidding me?? Oh it's ok that my son is dead because now I get to have time with my husband??? I love mh dearly but I'd rather be spending this time with the three of us as a family than the two of us mourning!

I also hate my body now, my stomach looks like it was attacked by a wild animal and my breasts look like deflated baloons from when my milk came in. All that and I haven't been able to lose my pregnancy weight so people keep looking at my stomach thinking I'm pregnant again. It'd be one thing if I had a baby to show for what has happened to my body.

Wow I really went on quite a bit, there's more but I'll save it for next time

Mjmksb04

I hate how I sometimes feel the need to look at the December 2010 board to see what my DD would be doing or think about what she would have been like had she not died.

greekimport83

I really hate when I haven't seen someone since i was pregnant and they ask "omg how's that baby doing?" fail...I know it's not their fault but goodness that juicy piece of gossip slipped by? I swear it happens at least weekly