I mostly lurk but I just needed to post a vent. Im getting really tired of non parents posting and bashing parents for being "lazy" by using certain things. Just now a girl a know posted a picture of the mesh feeder on facebook and said that parents were lazy, it was gross and people should just take the time to feed their children.
I can kind of see where she is coming from. When you first see that thing your like ew and there are lazy parents out there that do leave food in it for hours and continue to give it to their kids, I've seen it. As a parent who is dealing with an early teether, Im counting down the days when I can feed him solids so I can just stick an ice cold apple in it and he can nom to his hearts content.
My other problem is the bumbo. A "friend" of mine (Not really anymore but were still talking kind of.) said parents were lazy and stupid for using bumbos and anyone who uses one is a bad parent. Im sorry I had no idea you knew what it was like to have a child, and knew everything about how to raise and care for one. Basically Im sick and tired of being told Im a bad parent for using things to make my day a little easier and my child enjoys. Im not one of those idiots who leaves their child sitting on the edge of the table in the bumbo unattended or feeds them every meal in a mesh feeder. If my child isn't napping Im there caring and playing with him, he is fed clothed and I try to keep up with the mountain of dirty diapers he supplies during the day. I think Im a pretty damn good parent, so screw you.
There is my vent, sorry its long. Im wondering what you ladies have been told your using thats making you a lazy/bad parent?
Re: Sure Im a lazy parent (vent)long
I think the only lazy parenting I ever hear people claim is using the tv (for their toddlers), but no one in my group of FB friends would ever say that to another mom. They may think it, but would never call them out on it. I don't really care too much what people think, but I used to care more. It just comes with time, though, because you become more confident in your parenting abilities and realize some things work for you and not others.
so true so true. these items are not lazy at all they are considered safety items. the mesh helps them only get a little out so they do not choke but still can get the benefit of chewing on something. the bumbo helps them learn now to sit and it keeps them upright to see things. seriously NO PARENT can hold their child 24 hours a day.
I LOVE the quote "I will never" I learned early on in life to never say never. life has managed very early on to make me eat those words.
Wait till they have kids. they will learn what the devices are for. Some just do not know cause they do not have kids. The best part for you is when they do you can get a chuckle from watching them use the same items they are commenting about.
Not that it made me a bad parent but when I was pregnant my mom told me that having a boppy was a huge waste of money and totally unnecessary. Then she came and stayed with me from when M was 3-5 weeks old. Once she was here and saw it in use she never said that again. She even used it to keep her arm comfy when just holding M, and we would lay her down in it next to us on he couch.
I think sometimes people (especially those with no kids) are quick to make assumptions about products they've never used.
This person sounds like an idiot. She obviously does not have a child of her own or she would not make such dumb statements. Wait till she has a baby and needs to pee. Will she be a "lazy" mom for laying her baby in her crib? Will she pee while holding her baby? (NASTY).
We have a mesh feeder and we will be introducing it to A soon, as she turns 6 months on the 4th. She also sits in her bumbo, and i sit next to her and we play together.
This woman is in for a really rude awakening when she has a baby. It is harder than anything you can imagine. I do not judge any moms (unless they are smoking by their baby or endangering them).
I agree with you on this one. CIO is not for our family, but I know that if done the right way it can really help both the baby and the parents. However, I think that it does need to be done the right way and the parents need to be informed and sensitive to their baby's particular needs. Some babies just don't benefit from it. I had planned on doing a variation on Ferber originally, but have been blessed with a high needs baby so it's just not in the cards (at least not right now). All that being said, I do think it's lazy and bad parenting to not be informed on how to do CIO right and to just close the door on your crying baby until they finally stop. CIO done right can be a life saver, but done wrong can be down-right dangerous and kind of abusive IMO.
DD born 6.13.11 at 37w5d
DS born 5.23.12 at 36w5d
BFP 6.9.13|heartbeat of 128bpm 7weeks|7.23.13 ultrasound revealed no heartbeat|natural m/c and d&c 7.25.13
DS born 5.20.14 at 38 weeks
All are welcome
People get bashed on here for all sorts of things. In fact, they get bashed the moment they become parents for every decision they make.
A girl on the Health and Fitness board just told me that people have criticized her for running with her baby in the jogging stroller. It never ends.
I had a set list of things I would "never" do before I had my baby. Now I just do what works best for us. People are stupid. Just ignore or you can say, "Gee, I never knew you could get such great parenting advice from someone who doesn't have kids. Thanks! *eyeroll*"
Wait, so letting babies learn to feed themselves and, uh, sit in chairs is lazy? Sure, if you're putting a baby in a Bumbo for hours that's lazy, but whose baby would even allow that? My kid doesn't use his Bumbo much now that he can sit up, but when he did, he'd try to push out when he was tired of it. Your friends are nuts.
That said, I'm pretty sure every piece of baby stuff we have has at least one person in the world say we're bad parents, so I just brush it all off.
Well said! Couldn't agree with you more. Some parents may just hear the term CIO and not really know the right ways to do it or read books on it or research it to make sure that they're not doing it too young, or when the baby may have a medical issue that's causing their fussiness, etc.
Bumping up this post to say, what an awesome idea! A mesh feeder is now on my shopping list.
Oh, and I will admit to thinking some parenting practices are lazy. I also think some people make things harder on themselves than they have to. But I don't find either of the things in the OP judge worthy, and I would only give advice or my opinion to a parent if asked.