I actually had this conversation yesterday.
You know those little toy golf club sets? The boys have one, and they're forever taking the heads of the clubs out of the handles. So yesterday Daniel brought me what I guess would be, like, a yellow plastic 3 iron head, and the part that's supposed to fit into the handle of the club was all coated with something brown and smeary. The conversation:
DANIEL: Look, Mommy!
ME: Daniel... What is that?
DANIEL: It's a golf club, Mommy!
ME: Yes, I know. What's that brown stuff all over the golf club?
DANIEL: Well... I do not want to tell you, Mommy.
ME: Daniel, is it poo poo?
DANIEL: Yeah...
ME: (thoroughly grossed out and perplexed at why my little boy would stick part of a golf club up his butt) Daniel, I think you need to go upstairs to your room for a couple of minutes while I clean this off. I'll be up in just a minute and we'll talk about this.
So I go to the kitchen and start sterilizing the poopy golf club and trying to strategize this bizarre conversation I'm about to have. Daniel comes trotting back down after a minute or so has gone by.
DANIEL: Why was there poo poo on my golf club, Mommy?
ME: Well, because you put it in a hole that poo poo comes out of, Daniel. That's what we need to talk about.
DANIEL: But Mommy, why is there poo poo in that hole?
ME: Because it's what you use to poop, Daniel!
DANIEL: No I don't, Mommy. Why is there poo poo in our wall?
ME: In our wall?!? Into what hole did you put this, Daniel?
DANIEL: That one over there. (points at the hole in our wall next to the gas fireplace -- the one where you stick that thing you turn)
ME: Oh...
DANIEL: Where did you think I stuck it, Mommy?
ME: Well... Um... I... I thought you stuck it in your bottom, Daniel.
DANIEL: MOMmyyyyyy, why would I stick a golf club in my bottom?????
I felt like an idiot. A very relieved idiot.
Re: I actually had this conversation yesterday.
First, that's HILARIOUS!!!
Second, it happens =( We recently saw a young curious child in the ER who had given themselves a rectal injury with a stick like instrument. The parents were both just so shocked and the mom finally said out loud "It's just not something we ever thought to talk to them about not doing!"
BFP 12.20.2010 :: missed m/c 1/2011 around 8 weeks
BFP @ 9dpo 5.24.2011 :: missed m/c 6/2011 around 7 weeks
positive for ANAs (1:40) with a speckled pattern
MTHFR c677t mutation (heterozygous)
*folic acid, baby asprin, Prometrium, acupuncture, Lovenox*
BFP @ 9dpo 2.1.2012 || HCG = 8 : Progesterone = 19.2
2nd HCG @ 11dpo = 40 || 3rd HCG @ 21dpo = over 5000!
Stick, little one, stick! EDD October 15, 2012
Ditto! Way to jump to conclusions, there, Mommy!
But that is a funny, funny story!
When 3 Became 4