Is this the ASD or My bad parenting?

sweetie0228

My DS is 11 going to be 12 in about a month.  I've posted before that I've suspected ASD/Asperger's for my son.  The school has now 40 more days to test him.  I"ve already sent back all of my evaluation forms.

The problem at hand is my DD got a new prescription for her ashtma to take the advair inhaler.  It's purple, it's a circle and it's a springloaded clicky dispenser.  My DD (14) took her first dose in the morning yesterday and left it out.  When she went back in the evening to take the second dose the counter said 0 doses left when it had 60 doses from the morning.

My DS found it and clicked about a thousand times throughout the day yesterday b/c it was fun.  Yes he realized it was her medicine but he didn't realize he was dispensing it.

I've called the doctor and they can't write her a new script but they will be giving us samples to cover the month until the refill can be made next month.

I'm so angry and frustrated.  Was this behavior bad parenting on my part b/c I didn't show it to him and say no touching like I would to a toddler or Should I be upset at my 14 yr DD who left it out and should have known to put it away ( she left it out b/c she didn't want to forget to take it since it was a new med routine.) DO I get angry at Advair for making a fun purply clicky dispenser?

Or is this ASD and I need to move on and take new precausions next time and fully explain to a nearly teenager this is medicine and you can't effin play with it.

I'm really frustrated at this one.  Most of his behaviors I can live with and they are the "normal" in my house so at this point I wouldn't want it anyother way but this really really gets me angry on a whole different level.

Any thoughts?  I know most of the parents on here have much younger children but anything to help me calm down even if you all say it was bad parenting on my part. 

 

ToastieSimons

I don't acutally have advice on the ASD part, however I have advice on the medication.

If you have prescription coverage you ask the pharmacist to refill it under the "lost dosages clause".  Some policies have this, some don't.

Simply explain to the pharmacist what happened. You may have to pay your co-pay again.

MirandaHobbes

Well it certainly isn't bad parenting imho! It sounds like pretty typical boy behavior. Shoot, I can see myself doing that at that age. Assuming that he really didn't know that the medication was being dispensed (I think at that age I would have known that- but boys are different)- then I'd chalk it up to curiosity and/or boredom. I'm in my 30s and all of my pen caps are broken. I fidget with them absently and then "snap"- they all break. I realize this is a lot more serious since it is important medications- but don't be so hard on yourself. It sounds like he just didn't appreciate the gravity of the item he was futzing with.

Justinlove

I wouldn't say bad parenting, but I do think that this is not something you should just "excuse away" because of ASD.  Unless he is operating on a 2 year old level, he should know that medicine is not a toy and should never be played with.  If he doesn't, I would make it a high priority for his safety.  What if he had put it in his mouth and inhaled all 60 puffs--or gotten into another medicine?  I don't have a child with ASD, but I do have a toddler and we are already teaching her that medicine is a "no touch."

 

sweetie0228

Justinlove:

I wouldn't say bad parenting, but I do think that this is not something you should just "excuse away" because of ASD.  Unless he is operating on a 2 year old level, he should know that medicine is not a toy and should never be played with.  If he doesn't, I would make it a high priority for his safety.  What if he had put it in his mouth and inhaled all 60 puffs--or gotten into another medicine?  I don't have a child with ASD, but I do have a toddler and we are already teaching her that medicine is a "no touch."

 

No he's not operating on a 2 yr old level, he's completely mainstreamed and in middle school in 6th grade.  I think maturity wise he's about acting at 8-9 year old but education wise he's grade level or above.

This is why I'm so angry is the what if's you mentioned and that medicines have already be covered  

CrazeyJaneyR

I have been tempted to play with one. I'm an adult, and I have always wanted to squoosh the air out of on of those things.

 

Explain it to him, tell him it could make it sick and that his sister needs it or it will make her very sick. That's all. Kid does something stupid (which they all do) = a talking to/punishment and that's it.

 

 

timeforthetruth

Bad parenting?  No.  Blaming the daughter for leaving it out is a bad idea though.  Consider it lesson learned and move on.

Poppywedding

Advair is "fun" to click and spin - I don't blame him. Any kid would want to do that. Put the medication away!!!! Salmeterol (1 ingredient) in Advair is quite deadly if overdosed on.

ridesbuttons

Auntie, sometimes kids are just kids and they do stupid kid things without thinking of the consequences (come to think of it this might be a decent definition of a teenager).  Doesn't make it ok but does make it common.

I don't think the other posters are saying it's ok, just that it is something that could happen to anyone, any kid, special needs or not.

To the OP: this is not bad parenting.  It happened, deal with the medical side so your DD has her medication (obviously), do what you have to to remind your DS that her medication is not a toy/dangerous/whatever and file it away.

ntyravgmom

You need to parent more proactively around this, to anticipate the sorts of impulsive things he might do and instruct him on what you want him to do in a positive manner. Even a Social Story about leaving other people's things untouched would be useful because you don't want to tell him over and over again not to touch/use your makeup, dad's keys or a classmate's toy.

Unfortunately, parents of kids on spectrum have to parent to a higher standard.

 

That article is so scary! And why I am so proactive with my eldest. 

ntyravgmom

Wow! Two wrongs certainly don't make a right! She should've gone to the police and let them handle things within the law. Putting him in a coma should've constituted stiffer sentencing for them; I agree with you.

It is sad that this stigma affects someone as innocent as your son. I hope that no one is scared of him for the actions of others. Crime can happen anywhere and by anyone-autism diagnosis or not! I do think that it can be an important factor, however. I dread the day my eldest enters puberty. ugh!