October 2011 Moms

Uh Oh, Name Help Please!

We'd settled on a name months ago--DH had it before he had me. 

Then my SIL & her husband quietly let us know they had planned for the same name based on his now-deceased grandmother's name (she was his one of his primary caregivers all the way through high school).  It does sound better with their last name, and we don't have any connection to it except liking it, whereas they have the family/emotional connection to it.  They're not being horrible about it, but I know they'd really like to use it and just won't if we do, though they live many states away.  At the same time, they are not pregnant now, and may never have a daughter. Still, I think DH feels like we're stealing the name.

Add to that the fact that DH tends to strongly dislike the names I've liked and vice versa, we need help. And there's a question about any of them being limiting in a professional setting.

Liberty would be nicknamed "Libby". Tonna, Maureen, and Jane are all family names.  "Mariposa" is Spanish for butterfly and would probably be nicknamed "Poesy".  Stella would just be Stella.

And now my head hurts.

TIA! [Poll]

Re: Uh Oh, Name Help Please!

  • why not first name Tonna? it is very unique.

    I have to vote for Mariposa since I am also considering a butterfly name too.  Parveneh means butterfly in Iranian. 

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  • imagerkto:

    why not first name Tonna? it is very unique.

    I have to vote for Mariposa since I am also considering a butterfly name too.  Parveneh means butterfly in Iranian. 

    Yes, I love Tonna too, but it's my mom's name and I think it might cause a bit of tension to go straight-up namesake.  Also, she's spent her life trying to get people to quit calling her Donna or Tonya, so she's not as hot on it as she might be:).

  • Can you just use Libby instead of Liberty? I know several people that have Libby as their legal name - not just a nickname.
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  • That really stinks to feel like you have to change your LO's name so last minute, especially if you both have already gotten used to calling her by the original name you chose. I might be in the minority here, but I really don't understand having dibs on a name, even if someone has a more "valid" reason to use it than you do. If you both end up with daughters who share the same first name, it doesn't change the fact that you all mutually love the name and have two unique little girls.

    It's really nice of you and your DH to have empathy for the other couple who also like the name, but you should choose the name that YOU like best, regardless of who else has "claimed" the name. However, if you decide not to, I personally love the name Stella and think Mariposa is really cute, especially with the nn "Poesy". Good luck in whatever you decide! 

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  • imagerubysue267:

    It's really nice of you and your DH to have empathy for the other couple who also like the name, but you should choose the name that YOU like best, regardless of who else has "claimed" the name. 

    agreed! there is a very good chance that name will never be used.  even if they knew they were pregnant w/ a girl, it's not stealing "their"name at all.  you can't claim a name.  considering they live nowhere near you i'd use it and if they really want to use it too they can.  why can't cousins have the same name??   

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  • In our family, whoever is born first gets the name.  I had no idea that what I named my son was what my brother had always wanted. . . not like my brother and I ever talked about baby names.  Then they named their son what we thought we were going to name our son (we had a list for each sex since we were team green).  Then when they had their daughter a few months ago, they used our top choice girl name as her middle name.  We have no problems using that name as a first name, so it's still on our list if baby is a girl- but we're the type that needs to meet the baby- so we may not even use it.

    Point is, if you love the name- use it.  If your SIL still loves the name- they can use it too. . . it's not "theirs." 

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