how many kids do you want? why?

KatelynEA90

How many kids do you want? And are you basing it off something or just what you want?

This weekend we hung out with SO's family and he made a joke to his brother about me wanting 4 kids. His brother freaked out. He said we should only have two kids and not over populate the earth, which I can understand. But then he said we should only have two kids "one for you and one for him". I don't understand what that's suppose to mean but maybe I'm missing something. We want kids and we want our kids to have siblings because we both loved having siblings. I don't really know the exact number of kids I want, for now I feel like when we're done, we'll know. 

If my parents did 2 and done, I wouldn't exist. SO's mom wouldn't exist, she's the youngest of 11. Both of my parents wouldn't exist, they are the youngest of 4 and 6. 

preggersINschool25

KatelynEA90:

This weekend we hung out with SO's family and he made a joke to his brother about me wanting 4 kids. His brother freaked out. He said we should only have two kids and not over populate the earth, which I can understand. But then he said we should only have two kids "one for you and one for him". I don't understand what that's suppose to mean but maybe I'm missing something.

 

He means by only having two you are not increasing the population, just keeping it the same by replacing you and your husband.

KatelynEA90

preggersINschool25:

KatelynEA90:

This weekend we hung out with SO's family and he made a joke to his brother about me wanting 4 kids. His brother freaked out. He said we should only have two kids and not over populate the earth, which I can understand. But then he said we should only have two kids "one for you and one for him". I don't understand what that's suppose to mean but maybe I'm missing something.

 

He means by only having two you are not increasing the population, just keeping it the same by replacing you and your husband.

 

ohh! That makes sense. I could not for the life of me figure out what that meant. Thank you! 

alysalouton

I want 3 kids because im one of 2 and he's one of 5 so i figured it was in the middle. I want a big family but im a teacher soi dont want another classroom to come home to

kristin172429

Is it weird to say I have no idea?  We went back and forth a lot before deciding to have this one (which we are very excited about).  I think I need to feel what life is like with one and see if I get the urge to have another.  I don't think we would consider going beyond three though.  I know I don't want a giant family or to be outnumbered!  ; )

soralette

We're kind of at the "Two ... maybe three." stage. We'll see how we feel about a third after we have two. I'm an only child, so I definitely want more than one if we can, he's oldest of four, and feels that four was way too many. So we'll see if we feel up to a third after we have two.

HEmery

I'm the youngest of 4. My oldest brother is 10 years older than me so it was like the youngest 3 were the closest. That's what I want, 3 and relatively close together. I tried to convince Hubs to go to 4 but he's the youngest of 2 so we settled for 3. BUT if we had 3 boys, he told me the other day that we would try one more time for a girl. I was caught off guard when he said that, more like shocked! I think if we had 3 boys we would stop. My grocery bill would be outrageous with 4 boys plus my husband!

I've always wanted a house full of kids. I loved that our house was always filled with my family and our friends. I've always loved kids and we needed help with conceiving this one, our first, we feel so blessed and know we have the funds and love to give to many children. 

Beth1104

I used to want 3-4, but leaning more towards 4. This will be my 2nd and I am thinking I may be done.

jldubb0626

My brother and I have a great relationship now that we're adults, but growing up with a 7 year difference in age was rough. So coming from the "only child" mentality, I would like to have at least 2 closer in age so they can have a better relationship all through their lives. DH on the other hand is the only boy out of six children and wants our LO to be an only child since it was rough on him having to share everything.. especially with sisters.  But honestly, I think it will all depend on where we are financially and emotionally once LO gets old enough for us to try again

MollySm

H and I would both like a bunch.  We both come from large families (mine with 6 kids and his with 5).  We would like to have both biological and adopted children.  We don't have an actual number - I think we'll just see how it goes. 

JeniLovesNeil

We have always wanted just one. It makes more sense for the lifestyle we have and would like to have. 

However, we'll have the discussion again when this child is approaching two years old.  I think we'll base our decision on the needs of this child. 

babyau

I think we are going for 2. Both my husband and I have one sibling. At first, I only wanted one, but my husband is right, being an only child would be kind of boring, and we would love our child to have sibling to share and grow up together, so we are thinking 2, but probably not more than that.

KatelynEA90

ChoicesMom:

As weird as it sounds when I see a family with one boy and one girl it seems pretentious to me.  I know that is a ridiculous thing to say and I have no idea why I feel that way, maybe because in movies the perfect little snobby families have one boy and one girl but that is just my initial reaction.  I grew up most of my life with two older brothers and loved it and then when I was 13 my parents started fostering so I always had a bunch of baby siblings around and I loved it even more.  I loved the chaos of it all and always having somewhere to be and something to do.  I loved having to pile in to the van and be squished.  I'm weird I know but I loved it all.  

I totally understand. I have 2 older siblings(brother and sister) and I loved it. It was so much fun and it's still so much fun when we all get together. I couldn't imagine just one sibling or none at all! I also love the chaos of it all, the messes and noise and fun. 

kms34

My husband is dead set on two.  I'm fine with it.  I feel like the world is kind of built for a family of four.  Plus our boys will "replace" us when we die.  I know it sounds morbid but this planet isn't going to survive if we keep overpopulating it and draining it's resources.

PhysChic7685

Two (which is what we're already working on), maybe three.  We share the whole "overpopulating" perspective, so we'll abopt if we want any beyond the two.

kms34

PhysChic7685:

Two (which is what we're already working on), maybe three.  We share the whole "overpopulating" perspective, so we'll abopt if we want any beyond the two.

Exactly.  We'll likely adopt as well. We were starting to look into the adoption process when we got pregnant with DS.  After 2 m/c's we gave it "one more shot."

HattieLove

My plan is to have two and adopt one. I really want three kids but overpopulation is really something I don't want to contribute to. 

blondiemama09

When I think of "over populating the earth", I think maybe 5 or 6 PLUS kids. But not 4. I think anywhere from 1-4 is pretty normal, actually.

I want 3 kids. I grew up as the youngest of 5 kids, DH was an only child. So we did go back and forth alot on this, but ultimately we both decided (as of recently) that we want 3. 

ryry1977

Three (at least).  I always wanted quite a few kids, DH and I decided on 3.  In my family there is 5 of us, and I love my siblings!  I want my children to have siblings also.  We married late and will at least get our 3:)  If we had started younger maybe there would of been more (and if they were cheaper!).  LOL.  I really would of loved to have more, but I think I can defiantly live with 3.

KellyC703

My husband and I both come from families of 3 kids. I would like to have 3. We are having a girl this time, and if next time is a boy, I will have a very very hard time convincing my husband to go for a third. He wants one boy and one girl, that's it. And he says if it happens that way he will get snipped himself lol. So I'm hoping that the next one is a girl too so we can try for a boy on number 3. DH also wanted to wait a little while between the first and second, but when he found out we're having a girl (in his mind having a girl first was never really an option lol), he says lets not wait at all, to quote him "take one out and put one right back in". I said I would like to enjoy a glass of wine before I get pregnant again! He wants our daughter to have a brother close in age to stick up for her, I said if our girl has any of me in her at all, she won't need a brother to stick up for her, she'll be able to stick up for herself.

balihaigirl

Two, possibly 3.  We're going to evaluate it after we have this second baby.  If we can afford it, and if we can handle having three, we'd love to have a third. But I don't want to stretch us financially or emotionally by bringing a third baby into the mix unless we can handle it. 

sapphirebride06

We only want 2.  I don't want more kids than I have hands - we aren't really into the big chaotic moments and H has 2 sisters and hated it.  We want to give our kids more than his mom was able to give him and his sisters so we want 2 and that's it.  He was a middle child and I am the youngest of 3 technically but my older sibling is a half sib and is 10 years older so we weren't really growing up together so I liked it being just me and my brother. 

Jen&Louie

Your BIL sounds like a piece of work.  It's really not his business or concern how many children you and your husband choose to have.  And, IMO the over-population excuse is garbage.  There are plenty of people in the world who do not reproduce and others who are one and done. 

We are hoping to have three.  DH always pictured himself having 5 children (he's an only child) but, since I'll be 37 when our second child is born, having three more is out of the question for me.  I'm taking a one-child-at-time attitude.  We'll know when our family is complete, whether it is after this baby or if we decide to have one more.