NBR: DH argument

octoberbridesrule

 

I am a cranky, tired pregnant lady and last night DH got on my last nerve. He was complaining about how he never gets to hang out with anyone. So I totally made fun of him. Not my best moment, but he has been driving me nuts. And it's true that he does not have any local friends, but I keep telling him to go out and try to do stuff to meet people. He has plans this weekend to go to Boston to visit his best man, so it's not like he doesn't do anything.

I don't think it helps that I like to stay busy and try to do stuff with people. I like to have plans! I like hanging out with other moms/friends/people with pulses! I sort of feel like he doesn't want me to do this until he has friends to hang out with too.

Am I overreacting? Should I bite the bullet and apologize first?  

 

meryltheresa

I totally get where you're coming from, but I can also see his side too.  Whenwe moved to Baltimore it was like DH had a group of friends right away.  He worked with a great group of guys, and they would do happy hour a couple of times a week.  Unfortunately most of them were single, so it wasn't like I could become friends with their SO's.  My job brought on some huge weirdos that I wouldnt' have befriended in a million years.  Dh would always say, "Why don't you just strike up a conversatin with a girl at the bar and then maybe you can become friends?"  Yeah maybe...or maybe not.  haha!

sunnygirl05

My dh doesn't have a lot of local friends that he hangs out with either.   I have some girlfriends that I get together with every so often.  We joke about it though.  He'll jokingly tell me that the reason he doesn't go out is because he's a family man and doesn't want to be away from the boys....and how our boys will remember him being with them and not me.  He's totally joking though because I don't really go out that much...maybe 1x/month with the girls for lunch or dinner.  After he says that to me I just say that I can't help that he doesn't have any friends....lol.

Irisheyes1247

I would be upset that DH was making me feel guilty about wanting to go out and see people, because I do like to get together with friends. Neither of us have a lot of local friends and I feel like it is a lot more difficult to make friends as an adult, so I guess I can see his side too. DH is more of a homebody and luckily we have a few friends who are married, so we can get together and have them over for dinner and such, but it would be hard if he or I were friends with a lot of single people.

jnk062602

octoberbridesrule:

I sort of feel like he doesn't want me to do this until he has friends to hang out with too.

Did he ever say this?  Maybe bring it up sometime and see if he actually feels bad or not.  Maybe he doesn't mind at all, and you just feel bad bc you wouldn't want the roles to be reversed.

As far as apologizing....I always apologize first.  Unless it was something totally off the wall and all dh's fault, but that almost never happens.  But that's just how it is with us.  But yes, I would at least certainly apologize for making fun of him.  I don't think you need to apologize for going out with friends though.

octoberbridesrule

Yeah. I totally apologized for being a jerk.