Pook- Ferber ?s — The Bump
May 2011 Moms

Pook- Ferber ?s

Pook - I recall you posting once that you did Ferber with your DD... I honestly can't think of anyone else on this board who did it..  if you have time, can you maybe possibly tell me how it went for you guys? I just bought the book, and I LOVE it. It's so clear-cut and well-organized..  so much easier to read than Weissbluth, which I've also flipped through this week.

Just totally curious how Ferber went for you!

AND - if anyone is lurking here and did Ferber - please chime in! :)

Re: Pook- Ferber ?s

  • i modified it.  i phased out feedings in the middle of the night by rocking her back to sleep, so she started sleeping thru that feeding on her own.  our problem was having to run in every few hours when she woke fussing for her paci.  we used ferber's method to stop that habit.  it took 3 nights and now she either doesn't wake up or she wakes up and finds her paci herself...sometimes it's in her mouth when i check on her and sometimes it's not.  the first night was brutal on me because three minutes is a long time to hear your baby cry!  i think we did 3 minutes then 5 minutes, and she fell asleep during the 5 minutes.  the second night we did 3, 5, 7 and she fell asleep during the 7.  the third night 5, 7, 10 and we didn't need to use the full 10.  after that we didn't have to use it anymore.  i also started the timer when she started fussing because she takes a few minutes to get from a fuss to a cry and i wanted it to "count".

    she never had problems falling asleep on her own, so we didn't have to do cio for that.  i feel like that's how lots of people use it.

  • I think we'll modify it too - we actually did a little last night (w/out fully starting the process formally).. I had DH rock her if she woke up less than 4 hours btwn her last feeding.

    I gotta say, reading the amazon reviews (and elsewhere) of this book make me feel more rested already! 

    Not looking fwd to the crying.. but honestly, this might make me sound heartless, I plan to plug my ears and have DH do it. He can stick with it, and I'm afraid I'll cave - which would defeat the purpose and have all that crying be for nothing.

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  • image kgail11:

    I think we'll modify it too - we actually did a little last night (w/out fully starting the process formally).. I had DH rock her if she woke up less than 4 hours btwn her last feeding.

    I gotta say, reading the amazon reviews (and elsewhere) of this book make me feel more rested already! 

    Not looking fwd to the crying.. but honestly, this might make me sound heartless, I plan to plug my ears and have DH do it. He can stick with it, and I'm afraid I'll cave - which would defeat the purpose and have all that crying be for nothing.

    After a couple nights of this, she stopped waking.  She was STTN totally at 9 oe 10 weeks, so I knew she could do it, she just got in the habit of waking to eat because I let her when we were on a trip.  Her schedule got off track and she was hungry then it turned into a habit for both of us.

    Honestly, my LO didn't really cry during ferber.  Maybe for a couple of minutes. But she gets way louder and more mad when we make her get out of the tub at bathtime! She would fuss, cry a few really loud cries, then whimper and roll over and fall asleep.  Good luck!!

  • Our problem is my husband.  He can't stand her crying and moves her to the stinkin' swing  Though we had a little talk last night when I was liek HOW IS SHE GOING TO FALL ASLEEP ONHER OWN IF YOU KEEP PUTTING HER IN THE SWING. ahh. She's always been fine when I've done it because I can handle the tears, but I can't handle bedtime every night.

    I'm not a fan of her waking 2 times still in the night but I'm not going to cut it out until she takes a bottle every day at daycare cuz I have no idea if she is waking because she is hungry or not until I know she eats during the time I'm gone!

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  • image pinkflipflops44:

    Our problem is my husband.  He can't stand her crying and moves her to the stinkin' swing  Though we had a little talk last night when I was liek HOW IS SHE GOING TO FALL ASLEEP ONHER OWN IF YOU KEEP PUTTING HER IN THE SWING. ahh. She's always been fine when I've done it because I can handle the tears, but I can't handle bedtime every night.

    I'm not a fan of her waking 2 times still in the night but I'm not going to cut it out until she takes a bottle every day at daycare cuz I have no idea if she is waking because she is hungry or not until I know she eats during the time I'm gone!

    This is wise.  Sleep training is NOT going to work unless your child is getting their calories in during the day. 

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  • I started sleep training on Monday. After I was up from 12:30am-5am on Sunday night popping her binky back in her mouth every half hour, I was at my wits end.

    I followed the 5, 10, 15 minute intervals.

    Day 1 

    Nap 1- 40 minutes- I ALMOST DIED

    Nap 2- 30 minutes- Brutal

    Nap 3- No crying at all

    Bed Time- No crying

    Woke up in the middle of the night and cried on and off for an hour

    Day 2

    NO CRYING FOR ANY NAP! Slept through the night completely! It was like Day 2 never happened.

    Day 3

    NO CRYING FOR ANY NAPS! Woke up in the middle of the night and fussed for five minutes. I went in and calmed her down. She fussed and played for a little longer but I didn't need to go back in.

    Day 4

    We're on nap 1 right now with no crying.

  • We're doing this now. Tonight will be night 3. We're doing it so that DS can go to sleep without nursing. I'm fine with feeding a couple of times in the night, but not every 45 minutes. DS was starting to eat all night and not eat at all during the day. We were both losing sleep.

    The first night, putting him down (fed, dry) without nursing to sleep was pretty brutal. I checked on him after 2 minutes, then 5, then 10, 10, etc. He got really worked up but eventually fell asleep. The second night (last night) wasn't as bad and he ended up sleeping the longest he ever has: 6.5 hours!.

    We'll be doing this for naps too, but that area is still a bit fuzzy. I'm working on putting him down and giving him an opportunity to sleep, but if he's still upset after 30 minutes then I pick him up. If he falls asleep somewhere else, it's ok as long as it's not on top of me.

    I'm kind of sad to do this s o soon as I love having him sleep on me, but I honestly think it's better for our family if we start this sleep training thing now. 

  • Here is my take on sleep training, and I am certainly not an expert. I think it works best when it is followed exactly instead of overly modified. I think it's the, "If my child is still crying at 20 minutes I'll pick her up" idea that can actually make things harder. I honestly wasn't all gungho about sleep training, but my daughter's binky addiction was getting out of control. I tried some other things first, but there seemed to be no rhyme or reason to it. One night she'd only wake up once. The next night she'd wake up 10 times.

    My philosophy (on lots of things in life actually) is to just pull the bandaid. If you're going to do sleep training, it's going to suck and be super hard, but you're better off just doing it all out and getting it done with in a few days, than dragging it out over months.

  • Mine hasn't instantly solved itself in 4 days.

    We started Friday.  Yesterday we had a couple times he went down with zero crying.  But there are still naps when he cries for about 15 minutes.  (which at this point is a whole interval) The day before yesterday we got him back up after 30 minutes (as per the book, after i think three intervals).

    It's definitely working for us, but it sounds a bit slower than the PP's.  

    We started because my LO had zero ability to put himself to sleep, therefore that part will be the hardest.  (He was nearly sleeping through the night already, but did drop his last feed all on his own on the second night).  I'm glad we started it.  I feel like by the weekend we should be on very minimal crying.  It's so awesome to watch LO drift off on his own.  

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  • image CanuckFan03:

    Mine hasn't instantly solved itself in 4 days.

    You will get there!  Doesn't Ferber say it usually takes 7 days anyway? You're halfway done.

    I am 100% confident that the reason my LO puts herself to sleep and naps so well is because we followed Babywise's Eat Play Sleep from DAY 1 with her.  So she's been on a routine for four weeks and knows what to expect duirng the day. I'm sure if we hadn't done that I would have had a lot tougher time with any other sort of sleep training.

  • image pook:
    image CanuckFan03:

    Mine hasn't instantly solved itself in 4 days.

    You will get there!  Doesn't Ferber say it usually takes 7 days anyway? You're halfway done.

    I am 100% confident that the reason my LO puts herself to sleep and naps so well is because we followed Babywise's Eat Play Sleep from DAY 1 with her.  So she's been on a routine for four weeks and knows what to expect duirng the day. I'm sure if we hadn't done that I would have had a lot tougher time with any other sort of sleep training.

    Oh yeah, I think we're a little more than halfway there.  I think he says your LO will be sleeping considerably better by day four, and it can take up to a week.  My LO is sleeping amazing (at night), but it still takes some crying/fussing to get him to sleep. (But that is the brand new skill he's learning).

    I just wanted to put it out there because some of the PP's made it sound like it was perfect after three days.  For us, its looking like a week will be pretty good. (I don't want other people to get frustrated after 2 days and say its not working)

    I wish we'd started putting him down drowsy but awake earlier.  Next baby! :)

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  • Thanks all for the input!

    I am excited to start this... I think maybe next weekend... why, I don't know. I think I'll just 'feel better' if she is 5 months old (on Monday) when we do this. 

    And Pook  - can I ask you a random ? - why is your screen-name Pook?? Pook is our nickname for our oldest - he's 3.5 - I called him Pooky Bear as a baby, and now he's just 'Pook' or Pooks (around the house of course!).. :)

  • image kgail11:

    Thanks all for the input!

    I am excited to start this... I think maybe next weekend... why, I don't know. I think I'll just 'feel better' if she is 5 months old (on Monday) when we do this. 

    And Pook  - can I ask you a random ? - why is your screen-name Pook?? Pook is our nickname for our oldest - he's 3.5 - I called him Pooky Bear as a baby, and now he's just 'Pook' or Pooks (around the house of course!).. :)

    Haha, funny! My DH used to have a nickname for me and pook is the short version of it. When we got engaged and I signed up for theknot, I didn't want anything with my real name in it.

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