Babies: 3 - 6 Months
cyprissa
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People always talk about the breastfeeding zealots but...
cyprissa
member
I swear everyone I know is constantly trying to convince me to feed formula. Why do people care one way or another? Seriously dude, what is it to you? My baby has been gaining weight steadily and consistently (50th percentile for weight, 70th for height on the AAP charts). I've been really successful with breastfeeding and pumping at work (after a very rough start) and I'm really enjoying it but I have had so many people try to convince me to feed formula or ask expectantly when I'm switching to half and half.
For the record, I think formula feeding is fine and have no judgment on women who want or need to feed formula. I just don't feel like I need to at this time and I am nursing happily.
Anyone else?
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Re: People always talk about the breastfeeding zealots but...
A lot of people are control freaks. I know a lot of people were concerned while I was trying to BF E because there was no way to know exactly how much she was getting.
I live in a very small blue-collar town...I don't know any other person here who has breastfed. When one person asked what type of formula I used, they were shocked to hear that I wasn't using formula. Her response: "Well why would you do that if you can get formula through WIC?"
She seriously thought that everyone got WIC when they had babies. WTF. That's how common it is here to be on that. I am glad that it is available, because it really does help...but I don't qualify. But I chose to BF because it fit my family's needs the best. I could care less if a baby is FF or BF. As long as the baby is fed.
My experience has taught me that those who know the least about BFing are the ones who are the most against it. My DH tried to give LO formula once while I was out running errands. I came home to a very upset little girl and a very frightened DH. So I just tell people that LO refuses formula.
I believe everyone should do what works best for them and I feel blessed that BFing is what works best for us.
I am right there with you, I haven't had one ounce of support with me breastfeeding.
I've heard - are you sure he is getting enough, maybe he isn't getting satisfied with only the breast milk, why do you want to make it hard on yourself just give him formula, etc.....
First of all, my LO is in the 90th percentile for his weight, so he is definately getting satisfied. He is almost 6 months and is about 20 lbs. So there is no problem with my breastmilk not satisfying him. Breastfeeding is not an easy thing and it does take up alot of your time, but if you are committed and have a good mind set, its for you. I have definately been committed, but I think it would make it alot easier on my mind set if I just had people encouraging me instead of discouraging me.
I also feel for the ones who are on board with breastfeeding but for some sad reason it just didn't work for them, cause I know that was one worrying I had before I had my LO. What if my body just doesn't supply enough or my LO just can't get the hang of it, etc.
OP, it's unfortunate, but a lot of people have the old school belief that formula is better. There was a time when BFing was considered a dirty little habit that only poor people did because they couldn't afford formula.
If it helps at all, WIC has been making big strides toward encouraging breastfeeding first and I think they'll also pay for a pump, though maybe just a manual one. If they paid for higher-grade pumps so the moms on WIC could work and BF more easily, I think keeping formula free on WIC would still make sense.
A lot of women who formula fed in those days truly believed they were doing what was best for their children, and they will never admit that they were wrong because it would break their heart to know that they could have done something better. So they truly think that your baby would be better off formula fed too.
For other women, I think formula feeding really WAS the best thing for them, but they always feel a bit guilty because they know that breast is best and feel bad that they couldn't provide that. Seeing other women breastfeeding successfully makes them feel insecure, and seeing someone switch to formula makes them feel better about their own decision.
I only say that last one because I have to formula feed myself, and even though it was entirely not my fault or decision (extremely low supply, tried everything), the guilt and jealousy I feel when I see other mothers nursing is overwhelming, and I always feel a little better about it when I meet someone else who uses formula.
Not that this excuses anyone trying to tell you what to do, but sometimes understanding where this ridiculous "advice" is coming from helps to make it less annoying.
Aquarian Mommmy Blog
agreed! WTF? Sorry you have to deal with that from family!
Almost everyone is supportive of me breastfeeding. We had a horrible start. I had a ton of support from my Mom, DH, sister in-laws and mother in-law. I have only recieved one comment that was negative about breastfeeding. It was from my manager who is a nurse lol. Most of my co-workers breastfeed so they are supportive also. They are all nurses though, so that helps.
I feel awful for everyone who did recieve support.
I have had a ton of support for BFing, and no one has asked me when I am switching, which I don't plan to.
That said, every it comes up, someone has to tell their story about some mom they know who still breastfeeds their 4 year old (or 1 year old, or 2 or 3 year old, depending on when they think you should wean) and how wrong it is.
I don't know when we will wean, and I have a feeling it will be emotional for me to give it up. I'm not going to be that lady BFing her 8 year old, but I really don't see a problem with nursing a 2 year old. Jus' sayin.
I have the exact OPPOSITE problem. I chose to formula feed from the beginning and everyone was jumping down my throat to BF. My baby is growing just fine and not having any problems, yet I STILL get comments.
No matter what you choose, there are always people who feel the need to express their "expert" opinion on raising your child. Who cares what they think?
I qualify for WIC and actually get more food items on my checks b/c I don't need formula. I'm sure that it's still much less of a payout from the state than formula would be- so it's really a win-win. I think WIC varies by state, but they've never said anything to me about a pump (although I SAH so that may have something to do with it). It's sad that so many WIC recipients just take the formula without educating themselves or giving BF a chance.
And I agree with the PP's statement that it's generally those least educated about BFing that are the ones most urging moms to switch to formula. My MIL told me that BFing increases my chances of getting breast cancer, when actually the opposite is true.
honestly i think it's a bit weird when they can ask for it (talk/start unbuttoning your shirt) *shivers* creepy....
I was 100% pro breastfeeding DD. I never gave her a bottle, never supplemented, and would have gone past a year had I not gotten pg with DS and my supply dropped (weaned at 9 months old).
My MIL was very against bfing and would pressure me all the time to quit and would even suggest that she would give DD formula if I ever let her baby sit (she never babysat).
I was willing to bfed DS but it just didn't work out. Having Mastitis 5x in 3 months and my supply dropping meant I weaned him at 4 months old.
I can honestly say hindsight is 20/20. I feel Liberated not bfing anymore! It is so nice to be able to go out for more than 2.5 hours (DD never spaced out her feedings due to GERD), let someone else feed DS so I can tend to DD, and not get any uncomfortable or awkward moments when bfing in public.
I found that when I told people I weaned DS everyone (my OBGYN/the pedi/ nurses/strangers) would say "oh don't feel bad you tried." I never felt bad about my decision or guilty. Both have been great experiences but overall I am a happier mommy ff and don't have any regrets.
If it didn't say you are from Indiana I would have asked if you lived in my town. When the WIC lady came to talk to DH and I in the hospital, he told her he alone makes more than the limit, let alone adding in my salary and she was stunned.
At DD 2 month check-up, the doctor asked what formula she was on. Not if she was still BFing, strait up what formula she was on. I was a little stunned becuse I'd talked to him about wanting to BF for at least 6 months and closer to a year if possible. It was like he figured I'd given that up. Obviously he was happy I was still bfing, but it made me realize how few people do it where I live.
We are 6 months in. It was a rocky start, but we have been very successful. My LO is in the 85th percentile for weight and 75th percentile for height. Obviously he is satisfied. But my grandmother still asks me about formula almost weekly. Any time I mention that he's had a bad nap she says "well he might sleep longer if he had some formula." Now that he's old enough to eat solids, she's hopped on that, too. I think it's a generational thing.
BTW, DS sleeps through the night 10-11 hours, so any time anyone mentions 'sleep' and 'formula' in the same breath I just laugh to myself. Would my kid sleep until noon if he was on formula? Puleeze.
This!
I breastfed my DS to 6 months and only BF DD to 6 weeks. I got comments back then about how I should feed formula, and I get comments now about how horrible I am for not sticking with breastfeeding. Opinions are like a$$holes. Everybody's got one.
True enough. DS isn't even 6 months old and pulls on my shirt if he wants to eat. He also latches onto my face if I'm holding him -- I'd really prefer asking in words to a baby licking my chin, but what can you do?